Parents of ATS, I really need your opinions! Was innocence taken away by choice of book from teacher

Originally posted by Hawkwind.

Originally posted by nixie_nox
reply to post by Hawkwind.

 

As someone who was a child more then 13 years ago, you are deluding yourself if you think kids didn't know what is going on.

At ten years old you were learning about porn were you? Not gonna happen in my house. Just because you knew about it it doesn't mean all ten year olds are exposed to it. Deluded my arse.

They were only learning about the word.. and quite frankly any 10 year old that watches any kind of television.. most likely already knows what porn is..especially if they watch mtv.

We are bombarded with sexuality everywhere these days.. in movies..commercials.. and to think that a 10 year old child doesn't have questions..irregardless of what the teacher was teaching, is being naive..

I think the best thing parents can do for their children is to talk to them about sex, and not make it some taboo subject. ..and I think it should be the right of the parent, or guardian to do it.

I really liked what chrOnot had to say..so I"ll quote..

If your daughter understands that sex can lead to having to care for a baby (too hard for a child themselves), is a part of romantic love and commitment and that sex without romantic love can be hurtful and dangerous, then she will have a balanced, reasonable and healthy outlook. Innocence does not have to mean ignorance. Follow up with the teacher and explain the approach to sex education that you wish your daughter to have.

Originally posted by gabby2011

They were only learning about the word.. and quite frankly any 10 year old that watches any kind of television.. most likely already knows what porn is..especially if they watch mtv.

This is why I control what my kids watch, as should every parent. As for MTV, gradual desensitisation has allowed what is virtually softporn video to accompany much of the crappy music they play. I'm not exposing my kids to that bullcrap, when they're older they can do what they want but while I'm in charge of them I'm not filling their head with close ups of tits and arses on M damn TV and I'm certainly gonna do my best to shield them from anything porn until they're at least 12-13, what's wrong with that?

reply to post by Hawkwind.

This is why I control what my kids watch, as should every parent. As for MTV, gradual desensitisation has allowed what is virtually softporn video to accompany much of the crappy music they play. I'm not exposing my kids to that bullcrap, when they're older they can do what they want but while I'm in charge of them I'm not filling their head with close ups of tits and arses on M damn TV and I'm certainly gonna do my best to shield them from anything porn until they're at least 12-13, what's wrong with that?

There's nothing wrong with that.. and I admire that you care enough for your child to take the precautions, and filter out the inappropriate stuff that is out there.

That being said, does she go to friends houses to play?.. what sort of things are they talking about at school?.. Like one member here said, I would rather tell them the about the realities of sex , with what I think is wisdom, than have some 9 year old..telling them their version of sexuality, in the school playground.

Lets face it..you can't get away from the topic of sex.. its always been a part of life, and is what creates life..so why do we hide talking about it..like its some taboo thing..that is dirty..?

Another member pointed out how she grew up feeling sex was dirty and bad ? ...

Though it can be brought down to degraded level, that is disgusting and bad... we need to teach our kids why ,and how we view sex...and how it should be respected.

That's why for me personally, because of the way society is, and media.. I would much prefer to talk to my kids about the basic scientific realities of sex... from an early age. Feelings of attraction, romance.. are very much in media and society as well, so we need to address those types of feelings, and the healthiest and most appropriate ways of dealing with them.

Some kids can have very " romantic" type feelings starting from a young age.. so discussing different kinds of loves, attractions. giving them some guidance on manners of the heart, as well as understanding the chemistry of attraction...and the different types of attraction..and love.

This is just how I think and feel about it..and the key is picking the most appropriate time to slowly start introducing these subjects, and kids will give you ques on when they are ready, and what they understand and want to discuss.

I am not saying you are wrong , we just view it differently.

If I could do my parenting over again, I would make some different choices, and would teach my kids much differently... and even earlier on, just because of the realities of this society , and curious human sexual nature itself.

Originally posted by gabby2011

Lets face it..you can't get away from the topic of sex.. its always been a part of life, and is what creates life..so why do we hide talking about it..like its some taboo thing..that is dirty..?

Another member pointed out how she grew up feeling sex was dirty and bad ? ...

You cover many points but I'll respond to the above one by saying people who grow up being told sex is dirty do so precisely because they've been told it's dirty, not because it's not been discussed. I wouldn't dream of handling the situation in such a way that would create sexual hang ups in later life for my kids, especially seeing as I'm sex's number one fan on the planet. If they ask me about something they've heard in the schoolyard I'll discuss it with them but I'm not pro-actively discussing it with them until such an age that they can understand better, in my mind that's about 12 years old ideally and that's when they really need to know as they're hitting puberty e.c.t about then. 10 year olds should be into Ben 10, not Ben Dover, heh, ok, that was going a bit far as far as analogies go but you know what I mean.

reply to post by Ittabena


DID you even read the rest of my post where i said that yeah burning it was a little much

reply to post by WeBrooklyn


I have son who's 21 and a daughter who's 13, I think your naive to think you can stop your daughter from learning what's what in life.. it's a part of growing up!