Bi-racial racism

FYI.. I'm starting this post with a little background on myself and my experiences with racism. Then I get into the statistics! PLEASE DON'T SKIM THROUGH THIS AND ASSUME I'M PINNING BLACKS AGAINST WHITES or WHITES AGAINST BLACKS. Or any other race for that matter. I am just bringing up the point that racism towards milti-racial relationships and their offspring seems to be more prevalent.

For starters, I'm bi-racial. I am half black and white. I'm going to avoid using politically correct terms.
My mother is a tall, beautiful Swedish woman and my dad is a big black man! Looks a lot like Bernie Mac. He has 5 brothers, 4 married white women and one married an Asian woman. Two of my aunts married black men. Most of my dads uncles married white women as well. I always joke that all of the bi-racial people here must be related to me.
Growing up, I never thought too much about race since what I was seemed "normal". It wasn't until I encountered a very dark skinned black teacher in 8th grade that the issue of racial profiling came up.
I was a straight A student. Very quiet and polite. Involved in band (instead of sports like I "should" have been.. ya know... because I'm part black).
Everyday I would walk into her class and she would comment that I was trying to be "white" by the way I wore my hair or dressed. I also got a C in her class. It was a freaking health class! How does an A student get a C in a health class? My parents explained to me that some darker black people don't like lighter skinned black people. And left it at that.
It was that moment that I started becoming ashamed of who I was. I started SEEING myself. I was too dark to be considered white. I had very curly, dark hair. But I was too light to be accepted by black people. I was "light skinned with hazel eyes." I'm not afraid to admit that I am ashamed of myself to this day. 15 years later and I'm still not comfortable with my skin.

The story continues. I've encountered countless people growing up and even recently who have had some racial remark to say. A man asking me if I have problems because of my "race". MANY remarks about how interracial breeding is not natural and disgusting. Black people saying I'm denying my "race" since I straighten and lighten my hair. My own black Aunt telling me that I'm finally starting to look like "one of them." I get darker in the summers obviously. This was at a family bbq in the summer.
Getting rejected by men who blatantly state that they only date white women.
I had a white woman in front of a group of people say these exact words, "Who are those people who live in the trees? Aborigines? You look like one of them."
People assume I'm Mexican, Cuban. Someone has asked if I was from the middle east.
It's difficult not to notice the look of disgust on some peoples faces when I meet new clients for the first time. Maybe if I was totally black or totally white, it would be easier to accept.
The stares and looks of disgust I get it getting to be too much to handle. I feel... maybe as a part of some sort of natural process, racial divides are becoming more prevalent. And multi-racial reproducing is becoming a thing of the past and it's deemed un-natural. I really can't help who I am. I didn't ask to be put here on earth. And I definitely didn't ask to be mixed race. The only good that has come from all of this is that I over compensate a little. Un-healthy I know. And I probably need some serious mental help to learn to accept myself. But I finished my masters degree early. I've obviously stayed out of trouble with the law. I'm a very successful business owner. I purchased a house at 22. Would I have done all these things if I was totally black or totally white? Maybe. But I feel like the constant awareness of race and the stereotypes pushed me to NOT fall into those stereotypes.

So that's my story. After thinking about this a lot over the past year, I decided to look up bi or multi racial racism to find any insight as to WHY it happens. It's rather difficult to find non-biased statistics. Even more difficult to find statistics on milti-racial racism. I looked for surveys done by mostly younger people. It seems younger people are MORE racist these days. At least that's my opinion.


This one was primarily young black men answering the survey questions..

A survey done by very young white females

The main problem among interracial marriages is not: their history, their race, their marriage, or their children, the problem is society. If society were not so judgmental and concerned with race, people would live more happily. Relations among groups would be easier to develop if they didn't have to face the strains from society. Many things still have to be done within our society to allow race relation in our country, especially among marriages, to take another path, a positive path.

Source from quote above

Personal account of being in an interracial relationship

A disturbing video about pro-black relationships. IMO if a white person posted this, it would be taken down immediately, citing extreme racism.


So what is a mixed race person to do? Upon some of my research, there were even accounts of Latinos being extremely racist towards half black and half white people. If anyone else has any insight, please feel free to post. Finding non-biased information about this is extremely difficult.

Being mixed is an advantage, not a disadvantage imo. I suspect mixed people tend to be more creative. When two different cultures collide, a third culture not heretofore seen arises. Conflict breeds creativity and that includes inner conflict. Be proud of your black heritage, be proud of your white Heritage.

I'm completely astonished a teacher would knowingly make you feel like that mate. I mean what the hell. I've experienced prejudice too, although it wasn't due to the color of my skin. You've got to try and ignore these medieval dick 'eds. I can tell you with certainty that the majority of people don't think badly of you for having a darker shade of skin, avoid thinking about the negative interactions you've had, focus and remember the positive.

How rotten a person must be to judge anyone over their shade of skin, it's them you should be pitying.

Don't worry about it.. I'm half lebanese half american.. I know it's not that extreme but I get teased because of the mix. I look like a regular white dude, not blonde but just white with brown hair. I have been mistaken for many races.. British, Italian, Spanish, Mexican, Turkish,, you name it.

The thing is do not see yourself as a race, or a mix of them... See yourself as a human being as everyone else in this planet. You have your good things and your bad things like everyone else. So stop feeling bad because of people looking at you like that. They're the ones with the problem.

Let's face it, every single human being here isn't pure race at all... unless their race or tribe or w/e has just been found.

The world is very old and so is the human race.

I like to think about horses there are many races of horses but they're still horses right?

Rant over I just woke up and I think I don't make much sense.

Pax et veritas

I have yet to see a child from a mixed background that wasn't drop dead gorgeous. The only race you should be worried about is the human race, all other classifications are pointless.

It might be the part of the world you live in, I don't know. My oldest daughter is mixed half black and half white, has lived in Chicago and Phoenix and has never encountered the problems that you have stated on the scale that you have experienced. There was one instance I remember back in the mid '90's when she wasn't even a teenager yet when a darker skinned black man, VERY dark, straight outta Kenya maybe, made a comment "You aint black, you # colored" then he looked at me. I'm white. I won't say what happened next because it's off topic, but she hasn't had any problems like that since.

It's usually the less educated among us who make racial distinctions like that, so I wouldn't worry too much about it. Remember, you can't control what other people do, you can only control how you react to what other people do.

Keep your head up and keep the peace, hopefully it'll rub off on people.

My wife is a hot Irish red head and I'm Hispanic-Cuban to be more specific. While some of her family has been somewhat resistant toward accepting me, at the end of the day, we all drink together(Obviously they drink more than I do) and they've learned to get over it.

I don't think her family is racist. I think they grew up in a certain culture with certain ways of thinking. But anyone can change given the right opportunity.

I don't get down on anyone's race. Before I got married I sampled the rainbow, and I'm here to tell you that it's all good.

I'm not a huge fan of multiculturalism...But when it comes to the dating scene, the more the merrier!

Screw what 'society' says. Society never got in the way of my good time and it shouldn't get in the way of anyone else's.


OP, at the risk of sounding inappropriate...I'll bet you're gorgeous.

Originally posted by rcanem
I have yet to see a child from a mixed background that wasn't drop dead gorgeous. The only race you should be worried about is the human race, all other classifications are pointless.

Likewise.

It's like they pick up the best physical traits from both parents. I have a weakness for mixed girls....And red heads.

The main problem among interracial marriages is not: their history, their race, their marriage, or their children, the problem is society. If society were not so judgmental and concerned with race, people would live more happily. Relations among groups would be easier to develop if they didn't have to face the strains from society. Many things still have to be done within our society to allow race relation in our country, especially among marriages, to take another path, a positive path.

Where is society having a problem with this? I'm not seeing it.
Example:
After preparing dinner the other night I had the idiot box on &
noticed some dance show was on as I can't stand those shows
I went to put on the local news. Anyways, two couples were being
rated for their routines & both were mixed (White/black) couples.
I've yet to hear any complaints. Today on my bank's website I
was greeted by a splash for their Mortgage offerings & a picture
of a gay couple sitting on their porch (Different subject matter, I know).

Maybe it's because I live in southern California? I don't know. I see
mixed couples daily where I live. All kinds, black, asian, mexican, etc.
I'm not saying racism doesn't happen, but I just don't see society having
such a problem with this compared to 30 years ago.

reply to post by PassedKarma

I'm not afraid to admit that I am ashamed of myself to this day. 15 years later and I'm still not comfortable with my skin.

Don't be. You are who you are. Think of it this way, even if you were 100% white or black, there would still be people out there discriminating and hating on you.

And by what you have accomplished so far speaks volumes. Most people can't achieve that no matter what color they are.

Hang your head high and keep moving forward.

Thanks for all the positive responses! Apparently I need to move... I was wondering if it had something to do where I live. I live in a big city... but there are TONS of racial divisions and hatred. It's sad.

Blood is red, regardless of skin colour. people are people...

You might find those lines drawn in the sand everywhere, though maybe not with the same outlet. You gave some good links on why, and another thread got me thinking about it. Pride in natural things like race seems misplaced. Though, that doesn't apply to what we experience because of it.

It is conditioned into us in many ways, but maybe the ones that are more obvious tend to be the most common. Someone elses perspective will be unknown beyond what the individual can communicate, so right from the start we have that divide.

It is different to approach these differences with a healthy respect than it is to approach them with automatic fear. If a society is based on fear, then it is possible that the nature of people, or even reality, takes care of the rest. All that needs to happen is for an item of doubt or faith to be introduced into the mix. Then the reactions based on that will take care of the rest, because right from the start, even the individual perspectives are unknown to each other. When looking at things like race and culture the differences are even further removed.

Even if people were all the exact same color, the same attitudes and problems would likely exist towards differences because our society is based on capitalizing on that. It is possible that what we see with racism is showing a deeper problem.

It is entirely possible to change that at its root, individually, though the actual outcome may be unknown on large scales. It is a choice, and maybe it does require a bit of awareness, but it is possible. Those natural differences just need to be approached with healthy respect instead of fear.

We can change that ourselves and eliminate racism at its source.

reply to post by PassedKarma


Reminds me of how some tanned white people will tell other white people that they're too pale.

Your old health teacher sounded horrible. I hope she got fired. A person cannot act or dress white or black. That's just dumb. People dress according to whichever fashion they like.

But since you're bi-racial and you mentioned how people confused your ethnicity, you should learn different languages and intentionally confuse people just to get back at them and to have some fun with them. Or if someone mistakes you for being Middle-Eastern, tell them you're Cuban, or if they confuse you for being Cuban, really confuse them and say that you're Asian. And if they tell you that you aren't Asian, directly confront them and ask them what an Asian is supposed to look like and ask why it even matters what ethnicity you are, then ask if the person is racist. Chances are they'll shut up, because people don't like to be identified as a racist.

reply to post by arbitrarygeneraiist


Hahaha that would be hilarious! I should learn a form of Swahili and then Scandinavian or something.