Funny Racist Joke

(Ok, I'll start off by saying this comes from a movie...Boondock Saints).

However, I'm going to leave the actual race names out of this. Why? Well, I don't want to sound racist for one, but secondly, it actually works on many levels, depending on what race you are, or are joking about. You can pretty much interchange race or group here, or even sports teams.

But, it's just a funny joke. (just sub a race for A, B, and C), where C is your race/group/team, etc.

So, an A man, a B man, and a C man are all walking along the beach. They come across a bottle, and pick it up. A genie comes out, and says, "I am the Genie of the Lamp...I will grant you each a wish!".

The A man speaks up and says, I wish that all A's were back in (A's homeland), happy, and free. POOF, the Genie says, "It is done!"

The B man speaks up and says, I wish that all B's were back in (B's homeland), happy, and free. POOF, the Genie says, "It is done!"

The Genie turns to the C man and says, "What is your wish?"

The C man looks at the Genie and says, "You mean to tell me that all the A's are back in (A's homeland), and all the B's are back in (B's homeland)?"

The Genie replies, "Yes, that is correct...now what can I do for you?"

The C man answers, "Well...then I'll have a Coke..."


Yeah, yeah, I know, many here will boo such jokes, but man, some folks just take things too seriously. Personally, I've head many jokes at my race's expense, and laugh right along with them. If more did the same, they'd realize that there's a reason these jokes grate some more than others. Heck, Blazing Saddles is a classic comedy, almost completely revolving around racial jokes.

It was actually funny!



Cheers mate!

LMAO

Nice, I tried it with a few variations on A B and C and they all work.
When not talking about race you need to change the wish a bit but its good and Ill use it at some stage over the next few days.

Wish I had a short one to give ya in exchange but I only know story jokes.

Sorry

S&F coz it made me chuckle

Well have a coke and a smile and shut the F*** up Bill!!!

As Eddie Murphy said in response to Bill cosby criticizing his act!

That is one of the funniest parts of a Side splittingly hilarious movie.

reply to post by roguetechie


Yeah, I saw it on the weekend, and Willem Dafoe's character steals the entire movie (and he wasn't even the one who made the joke)....

reply to post by Gazrok




I've heard one like this before, But it wasn't racist.

Three men, walking along the beach.
They stumble upon a magic lamp.

The first man rubs the lamp, A genie appears.
''I will grant you one wish, one wish only.'' Said the Genie.
The first man wishes for a pile of gold.
''You're wish is my Command'' Said the Genie.
The next morning, The first man woke to a pile of gold.

The second man rubs the lamp, And a Genie appears.
''I will grant you one wish, One wish only.''
The second man wishes too win the Lottery jackpot.
The next morning, He found a ticket that won.

The third man approached the lamp with a big smirk, He rubs the lamp.
''I will grant you one wish, One wish only.'' said the Genie.
''I wan't to be a stallion.''
''What do you mean'' Said the Genie.
''I want my penis to touch the ground''.
''You're wish is my command.''

The next morning the man woke up with no legs.

reply to post by Gazrok


That's the thing about Dafoe, He can basically steal any movie he is in. Remember Bobby Peru in "Wild at Heart"?

reply to post by YoungMind92


Frickin hilarious. I haven't heard that joke in years. Thanks for the laugh.

Great joke from a great movie. And totally agree that Dafoe stole the show.

reply to post by BishopNGreen


No problem.
If it wasn't for OP I wouldn't have remembered it.

Here's a text joke I got of a mate.

A suicide bomber blows himself up (BOOM)
next thing he sees is a man with a beard standing at the pearly gates
are you mohammad asked the bomber
no said the man I'm St peter mohammad is further up
the bomber sees a flight of stairs and starts to walk up them
when he reaches the top he sees another man with a beard
are you mohammad asked the bomber the man smiles and says no my friend I am jesus
mohammad is further up
he sees more stairs and walks up them to the top
where he sees an old man with a beard
are you mohammad asked the bomber
no my child I am god
the bomber thinks to himself my god the prophet mohammad must be greater than god himself.
god looks at the bomber and says you look tired my child would you like a drink
the bomber says yes please
god claps his hands and shouts mohammad you little b@$%£?d put the f@&$king kettle on.

There are a few different versions of the 3 guys/Genie joke or even just the 3 guys... These version include two regular guys, then whatever group/race/team/nationality, etc. you want to make fun of (Man C)

3 guys break out from prison. They run into the woods, and each one of them climbs up a different tree.

The cops approach the tree where Man A is hiding..."Hey, what's up there?" one cop says to his partner. Man A goes, "Hoo, Hoo!". "Oh, it's just an owl" the cop's partner says.

They go up to the tree where Man B is hiding..."Hey, what's up there?" the cop says. Man B goes, "Tweet, tweet, tweet!" "Oh, it's just a tweety bird" the cop's partner says.

Now, Man C has been watching all of this. They come up to Man C's tree, and Man C goes, "Mooo!!!!"

****************

3 guys break out from prison. They get to the edge of a cliff, where they see a genie bottle. They rub it, and out pops a genie to grant them each a wish.

Man A runs toward the cliff, "I wish to be an eagle!" POOF, he turns into an eagle and flies away.

Man B runs toward the cliff, "I wish to be a hawk!" POOF, he turns into a hawk and flies away.

Man C runs toward the cliff, but trips on a rock and starts falling, "Oh crap!" POOF! (you can guess what he turned into)