What's the funniest thing your kids have ever said to you?

reply to post by GypsK


My son was about 3 yrs old, we were coming home from the beach and drove past a condo. Standing next to the pool at the condo was a big fat woman with enormous breasts. My son said "Daddy...look at them Super-Saggers !"
Me, my wife, and his older brothers all about died laughing. I think I had to pull the car over.

reply to post by Noromyxo


LOL good thing she couldn't hear that?
Where do kids that young learn this words huh?

Mine called me when she was on the buss from school on her way home two weeks back, she said "mom, when I get home, remember that forgiveness is a beautifull thing"
You can imagine my heart went racing till she came through that front door, lol
Turned out she had snatched a 200 euro phonebill out of the mailbox that morning so I wouldn't see all her phonecalls. *sigh*.
I can assure you that forgiveness was the last thing on my mind!

don't we love our kids?

I was about 10 and spending the summer on a family friends' farm. During dinner someone made a comment about the "timothy fields".
I said " where do the Timothys live?"
Everybody laughed at me because Timothy is a type of grass.

probably the most memorable was when my youngest who was just starting to talk fluently had somehow got into our 'whats for dinner' conversation and said "mommy likes pickles in her noodles", we definately shed some tears over that one

and this I'll never forget from when I was a young child due to the trouble I got in (plus the often reminders ever since ) and the look on moms face when I stood up in the blazer and proclaimed to my aunt "up your rear with a can of beer"

reply to post by Rustami


pickles in the noodles
is that something you would recommend?
Doesn't sound so bad.....

reply to post by GypsK


My daughter told me that normal parents feed their kids poison.


Well, not in so many words but read the thread and you'll see how I came to that conclusion.

reply to post by FortAnthem


At age 6 & 7, my kids were having sex ed classes, and upon returning home from school one afternoon, said I should tell them all about sex. Nonplussed, I agreed and sat them on either side of me on the couch. "Ok," I said, "ask me your questions and I'll answer them.

"Well is it true that before we were born, we were an egg inside of you?" my daughter asked.
I nodded, getting a hint now of what they were being taught in school.

My daughter thought for a moment and asked, "Well Mom, do you have any more eggs in you?"
Her older and wiser brother sighed in exasperation and declared knowingly, "No, silly. She already hatched us. Now, can we go out to play?"

reply to post by GypsK


no
like the new avatar by the way! specially the eyes

being from Belgium and all do you know who St. Bernardus is?

Gosh there are so many of these kinds of things that my darling daughter says, but three which stand out....

She calls vampires grampires,

Variety cereal (those little boxes of creal from Kelloggs) Karate cereal,

But my all time favourite has to be garlics, instead of daleks

She's 4 now, and its only the dalek one she seems to have finally got he head around, in time she will stop mispronouncing the others, but actually I quite like it, and have been known to join in with her at times

reply to post by Rustami


thanks

If your talking about the holy St Bernardus, I think he was from France, not from Belgium. Here we only have a famous brewery named after him and dozens of schools and churches.

when my youngest son was about 3 or 4 years old I took him to the doctors.
We sit down in the waiting room and across from us is a black man.
Being from a predominantly white area he had never seen a black man in the flesh before.
Anyway I'm sat there browsing through a magazine when my son goes

son: Daddy
Me: yep
son: Why is that man brown.

I look straight at the man, he looks at me , he smiles, he must of sense my embarrassment.
I say to my son.

Me: Oh people come in different colours and sizes son.
son: yeah but why his he brown.

By now I hoping the ground would just open up.

Then the man say's to my son I've got brown skin because I'm from Africa and people who come from Africa have brown skin.
My son looks at him puzzled for a second and say's " aren't you tired coming all that way just to go the doctors "

To my relief the man burst out laughing.

We were grinding wheat to make home made wheat bread and it gets tiring after awhile so I had everybody rotate in for a turn.

Our 15 year old son said: This sucks...... what is this the 1980's?

reply to post by GypsK


yes that one, definately my favorite from the 'drinking days'
that alone makes me want to take an European vacation

My daughter, Kim, when she was seven asked me about dwarfs when she saw one in our local shopping centre. I tried to explain before she had me in stitches when she said, "Dwarfs, they're almost human!"

The youngest is 5.. and I wonder about that one, but I have to tell this just because this is ATS related.. ATS has the Euro Show on illustrial.net and we listen in. I had the 5 yr old in the room and Ayana ( the one with the golden vocal cords) said she was so hungry she was going to eat someone.. or something to that effect. The 5 yr old heard it and said " is she really going to eat someone?! " It was funny so I told Ayana and Nefermore in chat.. I didnt expect them to speak to her on the radio. They said her name on the radio ( computer speakers) and assured her no humans were going to be eaten.. this kid FLIPPED OUT.. the computer was talking to HER and saying HER name. She was amazed and excited.. the laptop spoke to her and knew her name Now she talks to my laptop.. and Im not joking. SHe keeps expecting it to say her name again and talk back. LMAO!!!


The folks here on ATS are truly great. The oldest is okay, the middle has been severely ill since birth and treated special by everyone as we did not expect her to live this long and the little one has always been left out. She was given a little time in the spotlight with the guys on ATS and the Euro show.. you have to admit.. thats special and this place has special folks modding and owning it.. and not special in the short bus way.

My niece was driving with my mother somewhere and when they passed by a cemetery my neice said,

"Grandma, did you know there are people under those rocks?" (referring to tombstones)

And my Mom said, "Yes, I do know that, Erin."

And my neice said, "Maybe we could dig one up and bring him home and use it for a doll!"

Ugh. Understanding death is a hard one for kids, isn't it?

My not so little at the time daughter (13y.o.) saw me unpacking my old records so I could play them after dinner on the new stereo I just purchased. She was really interested in the LP's and as we ate dinner she asked, "Can we listen to one of those big black CD's Dad?"

Originally posted by Tayesin
My not so little at the time daughter (13y.o.) saw me unpacking my old records so I could play them after dinner on the new stereo I just purchased. She was really interested in the LP's and as we ate dinner she asked, "Can we listen to one of those big black CD's Dad?"

I feel you. I bought a tall stand up antique record player Im restoring.. my 5 yr old asked where the CDs go.

My 2 year old son has the habit of saying daddy over and over again till he gets me too say "what!?!" then he says...your face. Funniest time he did this he had just woke up and in a very sleepy voice said...daddy.. your face. Almost as good as when my 8 year old told me "Look Dad I got 2 balls" as he held up two golf balls he was playing with at the time.