posted on Mar, 31 2011 @ 01:35 PM
Ignore Badw0lf and listen to Heff...
Hey, I have a very successful relationship and marriage. Ive been married a long time and think I found the holy grail of relationship advise.
Here it is.. BE YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS BEST FRIEND AND PUT NO ONE OR NOTHING ELSE ( in this world) BEFORE THEM.
LET ME CLARIFY:
Be yourself and marry/live with someone who is themselves.. and most things really ARE just small things
.Play games.. get heartache.Yes, men play them too. Dont be a sucka.
NEVER be something or someone else for a potential mate/long term booty call.. for short term ones use a fake name and a hotel in another town.
I also dont care what anyone says.. because the naysayers are usually failures in relationships.. sex is a HUGE factor. If you are NOT sexually
compatible or your wife is scared of saying hello to your penis.. or husband does the same.. its destined for unhappiness and failure. For gods sake,
stop whining about what your spouse isnt giving you that you want.. you knew what you were getting when you married them.. choose someone sexually
compatible from the start. Cuts down on headaches and someone taking your stuff.
Dont give so much in the begining of yourself.. be honest, but be cautious. Im not saying hold back and hide things, but why expose your soft
underbelly to a complete stranger?
Intimacy is much more than sex.. cause sport sex is great too you know.. intimacy is being in your partners head... and being their right hand
man/woman. The spouse should NEVER be the enemy. DONT marry or get involved with enemies.
Be choosy. VERY choosy. I didnt marry until I was older. Id dated and etc.. and always dumped them when I saw what was hidden. I didnt care how much
money he had or how good looking. I had a certain idea of what I wanted for the rest of my life.. and would rather have been alone than settle for
less. Life is fleeting.. why waste it? DUMP them if they arent what you want.. why do you people settle for so little or delude yourselves into
thinking you can change someone into what you want to begin with?
If you date a slob.. they will be a slob when you marry them. If you date an easy ho.. guess what? Same thing. If you date a party girl.. it doesnt
change after they get a ring. If you date a psycho.. youre gonna get psycho for the rest of your life. You CAN NOT CHANGE ANYONE. Dont try.. why would
you want to anyway.. just look for someone thats already readymade what you want. If you dont knwo what you want.. figure it out or youre most of your
DOnt have kids immediately. I know, accidents happen.. but choosing not to use protection IS NOT an accident I dont care if she said she was on BC
or he said he was sterile. Youre in control of your own body.. so act like it. Dont marry for "accidents" because having a child doesnt make a
relationship and many times living in a war zone is worse for a kid than having 2 parents. Thats the absolute truth.Pregnancy is used by women
sometimes for control and to rope you in.. you CAN prevent this. If a relationship is troubled.. for Gods sake DONT have kids! They wont fix the
marriage.. or relationship. If anything it will complicate it worse and then youre responsible for using a human being liek a tool to fix what YOU
want.. how terrible and selfish!
Im dealing with this with a relative right now.. women CAN be abusers and violent. They CAN ruin a man if he dares to protect himself or fight back..
and some psychos will injure themselves and blame it on the man to get control of the situation. Its the way our society is set up and I disagree with
it, but I figure if a woman wants to act like a man.. treat her like one. Her vagina doesnt entitle her to be violent and you have to sit back and
take it. Unfortunately the law doesnt listen to me. You see this out of a woman.. have her arrested and get away from her IMMEDIATELY. I dont care
what your feelings are for her.. they obviously arent reciprocated. You cant win this situation regardless of right and wrong.. trust me. Women dont
hide behind petticoats anymore.. they hide behind biased gender-centric laws.
The first indication of her lunacy was that she was a huge attention whore. SHe'd dress sexy as possible and at first he thought it was great..
everyone wanted her and HE got to go home with her. You know the type I mean. It changed.. after several yrs and her getting older.. and not being as
in demand as a 20 yr old.... into her demanding attention everywhere and with every situation. WHen she didnt get it.. it was like an addict who didnt
get their drug.. she went PSYCHO. Unfortunately my relative was the one who got it taken out on him. Beware of women who are so insecure they have to
have attention like this.. who knows what it will become.
Cheating? No second chances IMO. Cheating is so much more than the sex act.. and its an solid indication that the person is not worthy of your
friendship. It will never be as you thought it was before. Anyone who purposely causes one of hte partners to be insecure in the solidness of the
partnership.. they are no one I would personally trust again. Thats a huge violation.. and I dont think it can ever truly be mended. Maybe on the
surface.. but this is something that ends a dynamic and growing thing such as a relationship. Like throwing ground killer in a garden. Somehting might
grow.. but it sure as hell isnt what was originally planted.
Love? Hmm its a hard one. I have ideas abotu it.. no one really can say what it is as its so individual. Its not as selfless as some say I dont
think. I think I love my husband because of the way he makes me feel around him and there is a trust there that surpasses anything else.. I am cared
for above all others, I am considered when decisions are made, I am secure and he will go out of his way to make me secure in our marriage,My quirks
arent just indulged.. theyre supported by him, etc etc etc.. and I return it *all* to him. There is a true trust there that occurs nowhere else in
life with no one else in life. I think thats love.. not just that feeling when you are with them physically.. but the emotional and mental ties that
bind you.. its the true friendship.
There.. wall 0' text.. youre all fixed now. I dont want to be cool cause I have an outstanding relationship.. I truly and honestly want
everyone to experience what I am and what he is. Its not hard and really able to be done. We are truly happy and I want everyone to be happy. I want
kids to grow up in happy homes with happy parents.. and repeat that cycle. It would make the world and my own experiences with others so much better.