Everyone is completely mad!

So basically, I'm just so angry, confused, bemused, and plain old frustrated with he human race in general - including myself. I've come to the conclusion that we're all nuts.. Like really.

I'll look a couple of examples.

Love: The best thing you can have in life, right? Love is the one thing we're all searching for, the search never ends, from the moment we're born we're developing as people with a primal objective to find love and multiply. But there's a problem.
First of all contrary to popular belief not everyone finds love, some people are destined from the moment they're born to search for love, not find it, and die alone and unhappy. A cruel prospect.
Others find their love, they're over the moon happy, until one day their loved one decides they're just not the one for them and bring out the awful news that makes your heart fall out onto the floor and melt into the concrete never to be seen again.
Others find their love, but just can't control their emotions and desires and eventually fall to temptation permanently botching the happiness they once had.
Love is cruel, and yet this is what we're all striving for in life, isn't it?

Our human nature:
I can only really look at myself and try to explain to you my views perceptions and judgements regarding human nature, but to tell you a little about my personal nature I'd tell you that if you were to meet me at random not knowing who I was you'd probably leave thinking I was nice, or okay. The truth is I'd do absolutely anything for you, I have so much love for everyone. Sometimes I actually sit at night and wish that everyone could just be happy and have everything they could ever want, yet I'd be embarrassed to tell someone that, why!? That's one example of how crazy human nature is - I'd feel embarrassed about telling someone that I wish happiness on everyone because I'd fear they'd just think I was a freak.
All this aside though, I am also very flawed, I have found love as described above, and it all starts off so well, it's so easy to be nice to the one you love - for a while. I now find myself struggling not to snap at or get angry at my loved one. Why did it all change? I never wanted it or meant it to, and yet sometimes I find it more difficult to show love to the one I love most than perhaps I would a complete stranger! You can't tell me that's not messed up, yet I'm willing to bet I'm not the only one.

I think it's just so crazy, are we doomed to be unhappy? Or am I the only one who feels this way?

Anyway thanks for reading,
I wish you all the best, I really do.
GodForbid.

reply to post by GodForbid


I can definitely sympathize with your words. I remember being in the position where I stopped showing love to my loved one even when I loved her. Eventually I realized that was a measure of insecurity but by that time it was too late. The way I look at it, life is a balance between happiness and sadness. Just try to find a comfortable balance between the two, and always expect that at the best of times, something bad is around the corner. Vice-versa, but as long as you know that it is a balance, and you are ready for it, it is easier to enjoy life's ride.

Wow.

You bring up some serious points. I have never looked at love from that view point before.
Your argument holds a good amount of water....

I am off to think about this for a bit.

S+F!

reply to post by GodForbid


I think the journey may be to love yourself

reply to post by GodForbid


i certainly do feel more angst and concern lately than in years past. but seeking and finding and even losing love is about the greatest experience one can have. as long as you have breath, the search for love will never die. you can't "feel" love all the time, but deep down you know that someone does love you very very much. isn't that what we want our children to know? and we are all somebody's child. isn't love why our savior died for us? and isn't love why we try and continue to try even though life is so hard sometimes. seeking love and never finding it, and the journey is still worth it. ability to love is what makes us special. easy to hate. hard to love.

reply to post by GodForbid

Love

From your description I think you may be confusing "love" with "filling needs."

I now find myself struggling not to snap at or get
angry at my loved one. Why did it all change?

Because you've mistaken "need fulfillment" for "love." This individual is feeding you "energy" that you need in the form of emotion, intellectual discourse, sex, companionship, etc. And you are similarly supplying her with her needs. However, you are also feeding each other energies that you don't particularly want. And now that your needs are largely filled because you've had someone feeding you these energies for some time, you're temporarily "sated" and don't feel as "hungry" for them. This makes it easier to focus on the energies you're being fed that you dislike.

Nothing to do with love.

I understand completely. I think the biggest problem is that what we call "love" is at odds with the world today. We evolved to have compassion as a means to increase survival. Now with the male/female roles on the brink of complete polar reversal, our relationships with any significant other works more like a male/male relationship. You end up with both sides butting heads more often than not.

The fact that you realize this, means that you are adapting like others ahead of their time. It reminds me of the song "Vincent" by Don McLean. I think the message holds true. Those who are inherently compassionate are bound to suffer because the affection will never be returned in this greedy world. After a while you end up getting jaded about it all after your repeated acts of kindness are seldom recognized much less appreciated and reciprocated (not a reason to do anything by the way, but it's nice to get once in a while).

There's really a fine line you have to walk. One which I have to admit I've never been able to find. I'm either dealing with those who wish to have over 50% of control, those who go through life totally haphazardly, or the most dangerous ones who wish to have it both ways.

Your specific case though, leads me to believe there is an issue you have that you aren't addressing and it's bubbling up through everyday things that should really be a non-issue. My best suggestion is find out what it is, or more likely admit to yourself that something you feel shouldn't be an issue actually is, and work it out the best you can. Dragging it out will only hurt everyone involved.

I have read your thread and I feel I have some insight to share with you....
From a very young age, I was one of those insecure young women ,who wanted badly for someone to truly love her...I was a attractive young women with nothing much to offer a relationship except my undying "Love"...
This idea landed me two marriages, both which were not what you would call a health situation...In my early 40's still looking for my Prince ,or just someone I can share my thoughts my heart...I meet back up with a man I had dated in my 20's (You know the one you wished you'd never dumped.) We decided to revisit a courtship;unsuccessfully I might add...At this moment I realized the Universe had been trying to teach me something, and trust me I can be a slow learner...I need to stop my search for my true love and love what is around me...love your house, your garden ,your pets, and people in your family...

but most of all love yourself...

and then and only then will you find true happyness...

Peace
Z

I knew I smelled pot in here...
So. After all of this thinking, do you have a solution to fix the insanity or is it mere speculation?

reply to post by GodForbid


I have made it a practice to break the ice for people not caring what they think anymore. It is not easy to stand apart from the crowd and wish goodwill and happiness for everyone. They do think you are nuts. However, do not feel you are alone. Ever heard that song "Billionaire" where he sings about how he would spend his money? First time I heard it I said now there is a person that I would like to meet. You cannot make those things up unless you really feel them and have pondered on them. Listen to the Lyrics after the first verse it kind of describes your thoughts.

reply to post by GodForbid


Its impossable to be happy or in love or any extreme all the time. Life will enevitably lead to suffering. Its in flux and so cannot settle on one extreme. The trick is to be realistic. Just accept that your not perfect and neither is any one else. You cant be responsable for everyone else. You've just got to try to make your own peace with the world and those around you. When you do find someone that you love and they love you, you should treasure it. Their will be times when you fall in and out of love with each other. Argue and fight stuff like that. Thats out of your control. You just need to understand that it will happen anyway whether you want it to or not. Understand thats its just part of the cycle and then you can better deal with these periods in your life.

Peace.

If it matters, there are lots of us out here who truly love you... you just must not have met us yet
www.youtube.com...

Love is something i never wanted and never will. Also human nature is just pure evil, and when you have been haressed like me you see the dark side of humans forever you will see it.

Pure evil resides in most humans, and most do not understand what is right and what is wrong, and i do not care one bit about what anyone says, this is true. I have never harmed anyone or did anything, and i have had 18 plus years of peopel trying desperately to get me to do something.

Just take sports, you would guess and be right that pure evil resides in staduims, just to do anything to win at all costs,a nd laugh in there opponants faces. There is no such thing as fairness, and if your naive, your gone in these things, fact, as someone will always do what you will not.

Yep i agree that all peopel are what is mad, and they are driven this way by society in general. Peopel love to destroy and take what is clean and pure and destroy it, amazing. Like how anyone can hurt kids. But if the police go after your life for no reason, they may use weaposn on your homes, and try to organise crimes against your family,a nd you did nothing. Pure evil.

I will never ever even consider bringing someone into this world. The peopel running it and society in general are just pure animals, waiting to destroy anyone.

reply to post by GodForbid


If only we all strived to only 'offer' love instead of always looking to be 'given' love.

Be glad for all of those that you have 'gave and offered' love to....for at some point in their life, they may need to recall the selfless offering of someone that 'loved' them.

Try to seek happiness in the fact that you have love to offer...instead of always looking for where you can 'receive'.

The best love that can be found...is not between 'human and human' but is between 'human and Spirit'. When you hear a love song...know there is no human that is going to love you unconditionally like the Holy Spirit.

Some really insightful replies here.

I really could have gone on forever about how mad I think the human race is, the whole "system" in general, ie money, 9-5 day jobs, late retirement, it seems like we're born to work monotonously for the best part of our lives doing something not many of us enjoy, only to die at the end of it, and the things that make it worth while (love) are flawed too.

It's a crazy crazy world, but I think the general solution as other have mention is to just make the best out of it and enjoy what you can.

Thanks for the wonderful replies.

reply to post by GodForbid


Yeah. I don't think it's fair to say that your loved one is mad or anything. I think your loved one is trying to do his or her best to fulfill your desires. What you have to do is keep in mind that people are only human. People can't be perfect all the time so even when you desire people's qualities you can't expect them to always be like that all the time. I think you might be expecting too much from that person and that's what the problem you're having is.

Can a mod move this to the relationship forum? This might fit better in there.

reply to post by GodForbid

My 'lover' tells me I'm nuts all the time, and she doesn't even know I am a member here. Your right, everyone is on the money trip, it's crazy out there. I put it down to irresponsible breading. This is a small planet and there is seventy billion people wanting. I like being on my own because you don't have to deal with anyone else's mess.

Lewtra

'There is always some madness in love. But there is also some reason in madness' Friedrich Nietzsche

Humanity is insane, the world is insane. We use logic and reason to maintain the insanity! Is it reasonable to go smash the bank up because of crippling interest rates and penalty fees when you've bills to pay? The banking industry and it's stranglehold on individuals, communities and states has grown evermore powerful because of reasoned choice to take no action to undo the madness of living under the nefarious cosh of debt. Insane!

We are saints made of plaster, our laughter is canned
We are demons that hide in the mirror
But the blood on our hands
Paints a picture exceedingly clear

We are brimming with cumbersome, murderous greed
And malevolence deep and profound.
We do unspeakable deeds
Does our wickedness know any bounds?

Something’s gone terribly wrong
With everyone
All the world is mad
Darkness brings terrible things
The sun is gone
What vanity! Our sad, wretched fires

We can’t medicate man to perfection again
We can’t legislate peace in our hearts
We can’t educate sin from our souls
It’s been there from the start

But the blind lead the blind into bottomless pits
Still we smile and deny that we’re cursed
But of all our iniquities
Ignorance may be the worst

Something’s gone terribly wrong
With everyone
All the world is mad
Darkness brings terrible things
The sun is gone
What vanity! Our sad, wretched fires

Oh little light we have!
It only serves to show
The snares and seeds of wrath
We have already sewn on every path

Something’s gone terribly wrong
With everyone
All the world is mad
Darkness brings terrible things
The sun is gone
What vanity! Our sad wretched fires.

Love=human conception. True we feel emotions, but we often make the mistake of thinking we're the only animals on this planet who do. Dogs and cats, for example, as domesticated animals have what I think of as personality. They display emotions just like any human would. So the thought of love, or the feeling of love, has nothing to do with whether or not you find your happiness. Human beings are intelligent, and unique in our level of self-awareness. Whether you're concious of it or not, you are scrutinizing everything you do, and everything you've done. You're anticipating everything that you might possibly do. Human beings are too analytical for our own good, and so it is your brain that often gets in the way of your heart. Just like the old saying goes, ignorance is bliss.

That being said, I think it is possible to "switch your brain off" so to speak. The secret is to just roll with everything that life gives you. Concepts of positive and negative, good and bad...are simply human concepts. They were created by us to describe the world we saw around us. We have to get away from that level of thinking, and label everything under one catagorey: life. You NEED to have some baggage with you. You NEED to experience the pains and sorrows of existance, whatever they may be to you personally. Without these "negative" aspects of life, you would possess no frame of reference. Your life would be full of nothing but positivity, but you would be woefully ignorant to this fact. How could you recognize something good without something bad to compare it to?

Live and let live man...don't spend fifteen minutes trying to decide whether or not your comment or joke is amusing. Just say it and see what happens, because fifteen minutes is a long time to wait, and it certainly won't be funny or applicable at that point. Don't spend your time wondering if you should talk to the cute girl in the corner, just talk to her. Otherwise, someone else will and you'll be left to take a cold shower. Turn off your brain, and let your heart and soul take the wheel for a moment.

Easier said than done, hey? I know I haven't succeeded yet, but hope springs eternal.


GtkP