reply to post by buni11687
As soon as I've posted, I'll be Starring and Flagging
and at moments like this, I wish we were empowered to deliver 'Super Flags' and 'Super Stars', perhaps in a gold colour, to denote topics we deem
This is happening more and more frequently where I live -- on footpaths rather than in schools, although the same principle is in action in both ...
and more, venues
Schoolchildren on their way home from school, walking say, three abreast, down the footpath -- ordinary suburban footpath
Approaching them might be an elderly resident walking slowly and with difficulty up the hill
The children expect -- expect -- the elderly resident or whomever to step off the footpath and onto the grass nature-strip
How long ago was it that children deferred to their elders ... were taught to do so and told the reasons why ? Was it only a decade ago ? I can't
Whatever the case, it's become the 'silent war', whereby people who know they're within their rights to occupy a certain wideth of footpath or
sidewalk -- are having to steel themselves in order to confront what is actually a new (as far as I'm aware) form of bullying, of gang rule. And
they're confronted by a new-breed. A ruthlessly self-important breed. A 'get out of our way NOW ' breed
I stand my ground. Have discussed it with others who've also witnessed this new (as far as I'm aware) phenomenon of self-important, silent
thuggery. So we stand our ground. Sometime, it means doing just that --- standing motionless. That way, the thugs have the choice of walking INTO
us -- or deviating in their all-important progress ... and going around us.
It's by far the young who've adopted the 'gang ownership' policy. And migrants. The Asians in the city here are great practitioners of the
passive-agressive 'move aside ' game. They meander along the city streets -- crowded city streets -- at four or more abreast. They pretend to be
SO engrossed in their discussion that they 'just didn't see' those trying to walk in the opposite direction, or to get past them
And ever polite, ever averse to a scene, you see members of the host population trying to squeeze past, or even going onto the road in order to get
I don't. I stand stock still. Their choice. Go through me or go around me. To date, with ill grace, they've broken formation and gone around
It's an ignorant, hostile practice and as long as I'm alive and on two feet, I'll be making MY policy clear in the same silent way as they
Although on occasion, I have said very clearly and in deliberately neutral tone, ' Excuse me, I'd like to pass'. They jump like scalded cats.
They're all bluff. They're trying it on to see what they can get away with. And it's detrimental to society to encourage them. They need to be
discouraged and humiliated into the bargain if possible -- humiliation being the most acutely painful of all learning experiences
I do the same now with queue-jumpers. Again, I encounter this latter problem more frequently with the young. Often they're high-school students.
Maybe these days, teachers aren't allowed to say anything to them which might 'offend'
them, who knows. But out here, it's the real world,
not the schoolyard where teachers bite down hard and cater to ignorance in order to keep their job and safeguard their mortgage. And in the real
world, queue jumping is a red-flag with most. And why not ? If standing in a queue were no big deal -- then queue jumpers wouldn't exist. Instead,
they'd be waiting patiently in line like everyone else
When I was younger and more forgiving, more tolerant, I allowed people to queue-jump, saying to myself, 'Let it go. It matters to them to be able
to push in and shove others aside. Something in them needs to do that. Just be thankful you don't think as they do'
. But these days, I say,
quite loudly (no more whispering politely for me on such occasions) ' Excuse me, but I was next I believe'
. Again, you see the red-faced,
scalded-cat response. They just don't expect it. They don't expect to be called on it. And the fact they back off shows that they knew, all
along, what they were doing. They just didn't expect anyone to 'dare'
say anything. So once again, it amounts to Ignorance trying to bluff
its way through
Of course, for the OP, many of the methods I employ aren't practical in his situation. But the standing-still method might be something you could
try, OP. As long as you maintain a neutral expression, or pretend to be checking your watch or something.
And I suppose it would be more dangerous for a male than for a female. Thugs are more inclined to punch or shoulder a male than a female. This is
where life is harder on men than on women. I see a lot of posts advising males not to make eye-contact in many situations