Almost died. Feel hollow now

Hey all I am sure this is some psychological thing however it is interesting non the less.

I recently was in an accident that left me with a broken foot and 5 cracked ribs. Due to the nature of the accident I should really be dead now and not writing this. I have however confirmed that I am at least what I was before the accident.

I feel stale now almost hollow. Like part of me is missing. Like a time shift occurred or something. One thought that comes to mind is the multi dimensional theories where they talk about us having copied of ourselves were different outcomes happen in situations in each dimension.

I am wondering if this hollow feeling might be me sensing the death of one or more of me on that day?? Is this possible? I do feel a bit detached.

Please feel free to add any thoughts ideas or theories that might explain my "feeling" including the far out stuff and the more likely things.

Also share any similar exeriences if you like.

reply to post by Xeven


Maybe you were supposed to die and you didn't and your soul moved on and left your hollowed out body to walk the earth for the rest of its days. Do you lack emotion?

Hi Xeven,

Mate, I know the feeling you have. When I was in my teens, I had an encounter with a shark while surfing, and although I didn't get many injuries (apart from a lot of grazes from the sharks skin as it swam past me again and again) the feeling of avoiding death was so absolute that it caused me to feel exactly the same feeling you described in your OP.

While I was underwater, and as the shark passed me, my brain dumped a huge amount of chemicals into itself (possibly to help me survive). The downside of that 'dump' was a complete feeling of hollowness and emptiness that lasted weeks. It was only until I sought counselling for the incident that feeling became to come back to me. Being from a typical country family, many people just though I'd shrug it off and since I survived, the worst was behind me. They were wrong.

While I was feeling hollow, I made some bad mistakes, that looking back now, were totally out of character for me. I dropped out of school, began to take a lot of drugs and generally tried to destroy my life.

It's good that you recognise that you're not yourself, and the best thing you can do is let the people you love in your life how you feel. If they don't understand, don't stop trying to describe it. If need be, let them see this thread. Talking about it seems to engage whatever stopped functioning during/after the accident.

My view is that some part of the brain may have been 'locked' thanks to the massive amount of adrenalin and other chemicals that would have been released. It's only thru talking and working thru the incident that these synapses can be coaxed back into normal activity. Once I started to regain feeling, the urge to cry and generally release the feelings that had been locked up was something I cherished at the time. It meant that I was getting better.

I wish you the best of luck with working thru this, and please keep talking about it.

If you want to send a U2U, please do.

Cheers
Shane

That hollow, empty feeling always follows bouts of intense emotions. And there's nothing quite as intense as almost dying.

I don't know. But something similar happened to me. I haven't really felt any emotions, good or bad since. I feel heartless (or soulless). Which I've learned over the years is actually a good thing. No more emotional pain.

Interesting experience.

I had a very similar experience over 20 years ago.

A friend and myself arrived in Nice, France to set off for a 2 month back-pack around Europe - back when we were undergrads.

We had just set out from the Airport, and were walking alongside a road - heading for a camp-site, when suddenly we were both hit by a car. We were walking in single file and the car hit us both, one after the other on our left sides. It appeared to be on purpose, as there was no other traffic.

I felt myself fly through the air, to land in the grassy embankment. I picked myself up, turned around and saw my friend lying in the same, prone position as myself. We both got up and compared bruises down our left sides and both of us had cuts to our arms.

The road was littered with the broken light cluster from the car that had hit us. Needless to say it didn't stop.

We were both in shock and felt numb.

Later, over a much needed beer, we talked about the event and, as we had been best friends since childhood we could be open.

We both felt 'different' in some way we couldn't properly describe and as you state, quite 'hollow.'

We both had a similar feeling to you that, maybe, we were killed and thrown into an 'alternative' reality were we survived, and that this is what happens when someone is killed in an accident. Remember this was before 'super-position and quantum theories' were much discussed by the common folk....but somehow it seemed to fit.

That 'hollow' feeling lasted for many weeks and took the edge off of our trip.

I think there is something to this and hope many more replies arrive to this thread.

Rgds.

Originally posted by minute2midnight
I don't know. But something similar happened to me. I haven't really felt any emotions, good or bad since. I feel heartless (or soulless). Which I've learned over the years is actually a good thing. No more emotional pain.

Same here, at first it had me feeling disillusioned but now I am glad too. At least for me I think was just getting over the fear of dieing. No emotions here either really. Very interesting thread.

at OP- '___' is released from your pineal in large amounts during near death experiences. '___' is a psychedelic substance, and such substances often cause the experience of ego death when used recreationally although its usually temporary. Maybe it is related to the hollow feeling. edit- That theory about the multidimensional thing is fascinating, Im interested in others stories as well.

[edit on 17-7-2010 by CREAM]

[edit on 17-7-2010 by CREAM]

I had something similar happen to me as well, to a point at least. When I was twelve (twenty four now), I was just learning how to handle high-speed turns on a standard bike - talking in excess of 20MPH. I can't really explain it, but I "successfully" made a turn... went around the corner, then next thing felt a "skip" and the bike was suddenly heading toward the telephone pole on that same corner.

Needless to say the bike smashed into the wooden telephone pole and completely destroyed the front wheel. I got flipped over the handlebars and ended up laying on my back a few feet away. The neighbors who lived in the house on that corner noticed immediately.

While being carried away from the accident, I didn't really feel anything.. and was more concerned about the bicycle then my own health and condition. The whole incident left a dent and gash in a "wooden" telephone pole.


[edit on 17-7-2010 by LittleDragon]

Sorry to hear about your brush with death and the suffering of broken bones.
I wish you a speedy recovery.

Perhaps you are having symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)?
www.nimh.nih.gov...

reply to post by CREAM


I forgot about '___'. Yes, pretty heavy stuff to get released. Friends of mine have played around with it after distilling it from a natural source (which I won't name), and it wasn't pleasant to see.

Sorry if I overstepped the T&C with this post.

Interesting.

I'm gonna suggest that you read up on Carlos Castaneda. Sounds a lot like the symptoms that he suffered when don Juan (the brujo) shifted his assemblage point.

Don't worry, I'll try to explain.

According to the Yaqui sorcerer don Juan Matus, every human being has a certain point at which they physically assemble this reality. According to the brujo, there are many possible realities, but we as energy beings "assemble" this particular reality and hold it in place — the spot on our bodies where we physically assemble this world is sort of down around your midsection, a few inches away from your belly.

When the assemblage point shifts, for whatever reason, you get this gut-wrenching sensation, your "stomach sinks," which is a sudden hollow feeling.

Whenever this assemblage point is disturbed — whether by fright or a physical trauma — it drifts all over the place for a while, during which time you can "assemble" other worlds and see otherwise invisible or interdimensional entities and weird stuff.

Unfortunately, when the assemblage point starts drifting, it also leaves you feeling disoriented for a time, aimless, pointless, even hopeless. That's because you're in-between worlds, so to speak.

Sounds to me like your injury may have shifted your assemblage point, and it's drifting.

The sorcerer would say that this is an excellent opportunity for you to see into other worlds, even though you feel strange. He was always lecturing Carlos on this, and Carlos was always asking stupid questions like, can't you make it stop?

Don Juan was amazed with Carlos' seeming inability to understand how significant an event this was. I mean, sorcerers practice for years to voluntarily move their assemblage points and assemble other worlds. But here was Carlos complaining because he felt unfocused and distracted and disoriented.

Fortunately, I think I remember don Juan's remedies. One remedy was a sharp blow to the back, between the shoulder blades, which kind of abruptly restored the assemblage point to its proper place on your energy body, right; however, it doesn't sound like you're in any shape for sharp blows.

Another, more sedate remedy was — now listen to this — to take off your shoes, lay down on a firm mattress, face-down, with your feet hanging off the end of the bed. Place a goosedown pillow on your back, so that it rests on both your shoulder blades. Sleep like that, with your head turned to the left.

No other bed covers, just the pillow on your back. It will keep your whole body warm.

And keep doing that until you feel more solid and focused. Shouldn't take very long.

— Doc Velocity





[edit on 7/17/2010 by Doc Velocity]

I had a similiar experience when I had a NDE in 2005, however I was gifted with a renewed passion for life, and a very optimistic outlook, however it only lasted about 40 days and then I was back to my old self.

It is "possible" but not likely, that you could be a walk-in.
en.wikipedia.org...

It is very rare, but does occur during near death experiences. What your feeling may be a reaction of facing death aswell. But, for your sake, you should always consider the option that this is a psychological reaction due to an NDE.

If months start to go by, and you begin to feel disconnected with who and what you are, who you were, and you begin to feel differently and separate from your relatives, spouses/sig others, and close friends... then it would be something to look into.

I am an expert in the walk-in process, and should you come to the conclusion that it might be what your experiencing feel free to U2U me.
I would be more than happy to help you.

Having had a near death experience I have a little bit of insight on this.


This is the time for you to take stock of your life and where you are going with it. I felt "hollow" for a long time after my accident too.
But Its easily mis-identified.

Its less of a hollow feeling and more of a calm that you have not experienced before. USE this time wisely. Reflect on your past and make right for your future.


You'll be ok brother!

Some great responses so far.

I think when we experience something close to our mortality all meaning.. as in the meaning that was brainwashed into us from birth.. pales into insignificance. Thus the lack of meaning and feeling where before there had been many things describing our reality.

I've had a few motorcycle accidents in my first 5 years of riding, mainly because I was always a daredevil with no fear of death. The last one broke my back. And when the spinal unit specialists told me I would never walk again, I told them, "You can shove that idea up your .... I'm walking out of here in a week". And I did only because I would not accept their version of Reality.

What I learned in those accidents was that time always slowed dramatically, and in ones that should have ended in death at high speed, things happened that would cause the avoidance of that impact.. which I think is relative to Doc's post on the assembling of "our reality".

With this "hollowness" you can choose your actions without being dependant on emotional input that usually drives us in poor choices.

It's not that you don't FEEL anymore, it's that you no longer FEEL as you did before.. none of the old having importance anymore.. which is really a positive in many ways. Although many Sleepers will vehemently disagree with that statement.

Edit for dyslexic spelling again

[edit on 17-7-2010 by Tayesin]

How do you know that you did not die?

Did it ever cross your mind that after one passes on from the existence known as "life",your "soul" just continues on in another "reality",doing the same things it did as before.

Just a "thought".

Nobody really knows what "life' ,"death" or "reality" really is.

Maybe that hollow feeling you have is death.

I have been in so many situations where I should have surely died but didn't,I am not really sure if I am alive or just dead and just experiencing another reality/dimension of being.



[edit on 17-7-2010 by Oneolddude]

Welp... I broke my neck in a head-on car crash, I fractured my skull and drowned when I fell off a dam, I've been in a number of calamitous rumbles, I contracted bacterial meningitis and survived, and I just had a stroke about two months ago.

And out of all that, I arise

STRONGER
every time.

Somebody is watching over me, people, because my older brother — who is only 7 years older than me and has suffered similar battery in his life — is going decrepit on us. He looks and acts like an old man in his late 70s. Time has not been kind to my older brother. I, on the other hand, am like an Adonis... well, fekk, compared to him, anyway.

— Doc Velocity




[edit on 7/17/2010 by Doc Velocity]

I think I can relate to what you're going through. About a year and a half ago I suddenly needed open-heart surgery. I went from drinking coffee on a Sunday morning to being in the hospital in a matter of a couple hours.

After surgery there were complications. I believe I had fluid building up in my chest cavity (the chest tubes weren't working) and they had to rush me back into surgery and open me back up. When they told me that, I was hit with the reality that "complications after open hear surgery are not good!) Being a realist, it didn't matter what the doctor said, I knew there was a very real chance I wouldn't come back out with a pulse.

I'm not sure what is worse, having a traumatic event and having an advanced warning of it or having it be spontaneous. In any case, I survived and did well...for about eight months. Then I was hit with PTSD. I had panic attacks, severe anxiety, disassociation and depersonalization. That was worse than the surgery. I thought I was losing my mind. I didn't know who I was and felt like I was a ghost observing the real world. But I wasn't part of it. I would startle easy, was overly sensitive to light and sound and aware of any little thing wrong with my body.

I finally got through the panic and anxiety with a lot of work and some medication but shortly after that I got the empty, emotionless feeling. But, it's coming back. I have a new appreciation for life and other people. I appreciate other people much more, flaws and all. I suggest you take the time to look around and observe the wonder that is all around you. Don't take it for granted. Even the simplest things are quite wondrous. Give it time and it'll come back. I feel for you.

I can empathise with the feeling of being empty.
I have had stupid OTC induced seizures and had a sensitivity to the world for alll my life. That must be horrible to go through. I wish you the best in healing.

The fact tha t you realize this is the best
thing that could have happened. Do not
let this opportunity pass you by!

When I was twenty, I was also in a bad
accident. Came outof it with a skull fracture,
two broken vertebrae, two broken ribs and
a sense of invincability. I was also arrogant
enough to think that people who cried about
little things like headaches and depression
were wimps and attention seekers.
Learned my lesson real fast.

What you feel is probably PTSD. It can ruin
your life in many ways if you let it go. You
won't even realize the things you do as being
destructive to yourself or hurtful to those
around you.

I didn't drink, but sex was my thing. Thought
I was the greatest thing out there. I am
now 42 and starting from scratch because I
am finally getting some help.

Do not wait 20 years. You were smart enough
to notice something wasn't right and that is the
biggest hurdle.

If you have any questions feel free to
U2U me. Good Luck.

reply to post by coyotee99

We both had a similar feeling to you that, maybe, we were killed and thrown into an 'alternative' reality were we survived, and that this is what happens when someone is killed in an accident.

I had a very weird not long ago...where bad things kept happening, and each time I would force myself to wake up, except I wasn't really waking up, I was just going into another dream...it happened like 3 or 4 times before I actually woke up, and I when I did wake up for "real", I still wasn't sure I had woken for "real"...had I just moved into another dream again? It did screw with my head...you can read it here, though my recount of the dream is pretty vague, as I forgot most of the facts...