A Strange Feeling as of Late...

reply to post by Pastamancer


This. I also feel like I've missed seeing something important, that niggle you get when there was something important you have to do but can't remember.

On an offtopic note: Is your usename anything to do with KoL?

- Phoenix

ok... I gotta find that lightning strike video again, cause that was weird. i am trippin out.

I'm having the weirdest thoughts. what if UFOs are not what we think they are. what if aliens are what they say they are but UFOs are not what WE think they are.

This is very hard to explain. I need to calm down.

reply to post by ChaosMagician


What do you mean by tripping, right now I've ben listening to 16 bit remixes of music and listening to sitar music, I wouldn't say that I'm tripping as I'm not taking drugs and not saying you are either but I too feel a little out of it I feel like I could do a thousand things at once.

Right now i'm just grooving along to the music and doing coursework and things

reply to post by phoenix_zephyr


Very much so. Behold the awesome power of the Pastamancer and the swift and subtle to anger Saucerer.

I thought it somehow appropriate, but not many people appreciate my sense of humor.

That's.. something like it. Not like wondering if you turned the stove off when you were done cooking or having the nagging feeling you forgot an important appointment that day. It's more pervasive. Not quite insidious but subtle. Powerful. You get the feeling that you really should be paying more attention, that something important depends on it. It's driving me up the wall. Despite two sleeping pills and some bedtime reading I just can't.. can't rest. Not for lack of stillness of mind, not for lack of relaxation. I'm driven when it comes to puzzles and sometimes care more about life than I should. I have a feeling that this isn't anything soon and there isn't anything I can do about it, but I really feel the need to be sharp right now and pay attention. To listen, pick up things.

Hi everyone,

While looking into more trippy music I came across this:

Plug your headphones in and make sure your PC/Laptop is outputin in stero:



I would be interested in hearing others experiences with this track

reply to post by klain


I'm hesitant about mucking around with Binaural beats. They're pretty experimental and do funny things to the operating frequency of your brain at least in the short term. Call me paranoid but it took me until just a few years ago to jump on the cellphone bandwagon. I don't like frequencies screwing with my head, especially not intentionally exposing myself to ones designed for that purpose.

-Edit- The binaural beats, not the cellphones. Regarding the cellphones, I'm not a fan of any transmitter of that power so close to my temporal lobe that the only thing seperating it and the thing that regulates all conscious thought is about a half inch of bone and tissue.

Originally posted by Pastamancer
reply to post by klain

 

I'm hesitant about mucking around with Binaural beats. They're pretty experimental and do funny things to the operating frequency of your brain at least in the short term. Call me paranoid but it took me until just a few years ago to jump on the cellphone bandwagon. I don't like frequencies screwing with my head, especially not intentionally exposing myself to ones designed for that purpose.

-Edit- The binaural beats, not the cellphones. Regarding the cellphones, I'm not a fan of any transmitter of that power so close to my temporal lobe that the only thing seperating it and the thing that regulates all conscious thought is about a half inch of bone and tissue.

edit on 1-5-2011 by Pastamancer because: Brain not working. Grog needs sleep.

I do agree to some extent in the sense that there has been no long termresearch into the effect of communication signals on the human brain, a lot of us have wireless internet in our houses now, so do our surrounding neighbours then there is GPS satellite TV, bluetooth all sorts of things.

High electro-magetic fields in targeted areas of the brain have been proven to shut certain parts of the brain off.

I know this is off topic and it genuinly had a point which seems to of escaped me at this late hour lol

We are slowly trekking our way through this new age.

It's so fun! So many new cool ideas are being brought to fruition.

reply to post by SolarE-Souljah


It's fun, exciting and useful, but I still wouldn't walk over a downed live powerline. I'm not a fan of all this wild, energy in the air. For the longest time I couldn't go near large clusters of heavy duty appliances.. like the refridgerator section in Sears. Gave me searing pain in my head that didn't stop until I was far clear of them.

I live in a fairly undeveloped small town by choice, but even here the noise makes it hard to think sometimes. The interplay of all this artificial energy makes you have to numb down your mind and retreat your senses. The more contact with electronics I have the worse I feel over a prolonged period of time. Starts with sleep deprevation, fatigue, headaches.

It's.. severely off topic. We should get back on course, as much as this tangent merits conversation among sensitives.

Okay guys, you know this is a particularly transitioning time.

BE READY. OMG be ready.

There are guaranteed changes as of right now.

Flow with it. Fortify yourself.

On a side note, the energy flying around lately is absolutely different than what it's been.

Today in particular, there was a HUGEEE shift. I mean this is it. This was the shift.

This is intense.

The energy right now is literally screaming.

As of right now, in these times, I might hook up with this one chick. Maybe two.

We are in the times we spoke of.

I am deathly afraid of misconceptions right now. I have seen it all over this forum at times and certainly in the world and feel that people can destroy destiny with ignorance and confusion. I know it happens in the world... a lack of justice and that feeling very much peaked within me today.

i feel a little better now so here is to truth being revealed in light without the scourge of the lie in death and darkness.
To believe in and hope for a better day, to make that a reality instead of being lost in fear and ignorance... for what we hold dear, may they be with us always... always.
May our true identities be known with ascension as our plan.

reply to post by Pastamancer


I tended more towards the Moxie classes when I last played aaaaaages ago

Anyway, yes, exactly that, like missing something important right in front of you. Thank you, I had trouble putting it into words, stupid brain

Absolutely love puzzles, always trying to keep my mind active

reply to post by klain


I tried listening to that, but as usual with that sort of music, it just makes my tinnitus worse, sorry

- Phoenix

I literally catapulted out of bed this morning - no sense of grogginess at all with only 6 hours of sleep.

There is tiredness behind eyes, but the immediate consciousness and awareness was far beyond the normal level for the first few seconds of waking from a deep dream filled sleep.

I start my journey to the shamanic conference today, where for a week myself and 120 others will be in ceremony in celebration of spring.

Great blessings to all,

-GM

when I said ascension, i was not so much referring to thinking that some are about to be "taken up" but who knows?... I just want to clarify this. I was referring to spiritual ascension. Progress, doing what's right, going the distance, not taking the easy way out in blindness, holding on to the sanctity of life for those you love. To think that someone did this for me and to hold certain that I would do the same for them... to do these things for each other- this is what life means.

Yesterday was unbelievable. I am still confused and worried but i feel blessed in my heart for the things I've seen.

reply to post by Gradius Maximus


After a day or so of a lot of difficulty sleeping I had a similar experience.. and an odd dream.

I had visited the family that lived in my old home we sold off years ago. I was a darker, more reckless person when I lived there. Far more violent and fuelled my skills with hate and anger.. it explains my feelings towards psychic vampires and their ilk and why I believe so firmly they need to be impeded or neutered spiritually for their own safety and the safety of those that love them. Make them work to get their strength back. Good, honest discipline, study and effort.

The dream took place there, but the house was rebuilt. I knew in waking life it had been rebuilt. But the structure still stands and a young boy there, their son.. no more than 12 or 14, about the age I was when I had started the path... he was curious about the house. He wanted to know what it was like when I had lived there. I took him around.. showed him all the little spots that were hidden from unsuspecting eyes that you could hide away things that boys his age liked to hide. I told him of the history of the house.. my family built the house from nothing when their home burned down on the same plot.

Scrubbed away the ashes and rebuilt.. We were standing in the front porch, looking over the family's book collection.. he was studious.. He reminded me a lot of myself at that age, but not full of turmoil, not shaken by the changes taking hold of his life.. and then.. I saw a bear outside. Not a grizzly or any bear particularly out of place in that neck of the woods. It was not quite an urban area or not quite a rural area. It wasn't uncommon to see some creatures wander out of the nearby woods and poke around at trash cans, which was what this one was doing.

It smelled something. It walked in the open garage door and went to investigate the smell in the house.. the young boy saw what I saw and panicked, ran to save his little sister.. barely more than a toddler but would be right in the path of that bear if it came through the breezeway door. I yelled at him and tried to grab the back of his shirt to make him stop.. I told him to stay with me and I'd call 911. If the bear got him there'd be two people dead that day, not one.

He didn't listen to me. He tore free and ran into the living room. The bear finished playing nice with the door and just thumped it off its hinges just in time to get a facefull of angry, reckless, defensive teenager. I'm a pragmatic person.. but I also have a weakness for kids. I normally wouldn't be this stupid or reckless, but the dream.. maybe my subconscious.. it knew my weakness. It knew where to hit me. I grabbed my cellphone from my pocket and chunked it as hard as I could at the bear's head from 15 feet away. It hit pretty hard, bears don't like being hit.

I ran out the front door without looking behind me, the bear smashed through the sliding glass doors of the living room without much of a pause.. it chased me around the side yard, I had hoped to lure it far enough away from the kids that they could get to safety and hopefully the kid would be smart enough to recover my cellphone and call 911.

I didn't make it far. I didn't really think about how fast bears could run. Just at the end there.. just in that moment of the fear of death, I kind of realised I was dreaming, but to me it didn't make it any more deadly.. but I had remembered what I had to do.. what I had to do to survive it. The bear got me by the arm and I had already worked up what I needed and as soon as it started thrashing me, I let my bowels go. Best thing to do in a bear attack. Play dead. Real dead.

It started to hesitate and I tried not to breathe.. and then I woke up. Kind of like you said.. full of life.. full of energy. That's not how I wake up from nightmares like that. But I woke up full of purpose. I'm hard to get up in the morning. I linger, I ponder over my dreams and thoughts.. And I don't react well to bright lights in either case. Takes me a while to steel myself to get out into the sunshine.

And then it hit me. I don't know what. Like a recoil. One moment I was out of bed and the next my legs went out from under me. Not like slipping or something.. My body just instantly ceased to follow my commands and I was going down as fast as I came up. I barely had enough time to angle my weight towards the bed to get a somewhat soft landing before my entire nervous system went out on me. It only lasted about 3 to 5 seconds but it was disconcerting. Nothing worked. Couldn't move at all, didn't want to move. Everything hurt in a dull, not quite aware of the full extent of the pain, but really aware that it was all over my body.

Then the pain was gone, save for the bruise that was probably going to develop along my shins from where I hit my bedrail.

I don't know what it is. Still don't.. but today.. my mind has simulatanously been in overclocked, freshly organized, dusted and oiled mode... and then a strange, discombulated fog. The slips that come out of my mouth infer that when I'm in the fog, I've somewhat lost my sense of linear time. I know what I'm thinking about or intend to say, but the words reference things that happened days or hours or weeks ago or later..

I told an advertiser for a newspaper that I already had a prescription to it. Surprise.. it was mentioned about 2 hours later that I needed to pick up a prescription for my family member. That slip of the mouth and coincidence was odd enough. I held up a reciept at the drugstore and told her I got my drink back at the optical center. That was the next stop on the way home. I was aware of going to the eye doctor's, but.. things have been jumbled, out of order when the fog hits. Today worries me.

I think I have posted here in the past about dreams where I was an intermediary between humans and some other species, helping humans to understand the other species. I had another one of those dreams last night. This was a species who looked human but had a counterpart who looked almost slug-like. Think of The Golden Compass. That sort of relationship between the two. The emotions and moods of the two were intimately intertwined and I was helping people to understand that. Sort of, yeah, the slugs are hideous but you should be still be nice because the counterpart who looks normal must remain in a good mood for us to be ok.

Very interesting. Also, the energy has been off the charts up and down for me, but mostly up. Not sleeping and when I do, dreams like the above. I feel things are definitely ramping up and I keep looking for the changes and not seeing them, but am definitely feeling something.

You can't really deny the feeling at this point.

When my own family members and friends start talking about it, I know it is really starting to ramp up.

Even amid the chaos, I feel extremely energized and excited.

I don't remember who I was talking to about this,

but basically in times of strife is when you can flex your spiritual muscles the most.

Drained.

That's the best way I can put it.

Mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually.


Drained.


In the words of Silent Bob: "I've got nuthin'."


I've got people all around me eating my time, eating my energy, relying on me for trivial matters, and no time for myself or for discussing ideas with all of you.


I don't know what has happened in the past week, but this is the lowest that I have felt spiritually in years. The constant bombardment of people bugging me for this or that, or threatening to end friendships because "I don't have time for them," the constant bickering, the hate, the malice, the rampant blood lust, the ignorance, the "ME ME ME!" is getting to me on a deep level.

I suppose I should feel honored to have so many people relying on me, but it seems to me that they are trying to use me. This has not happened before. Just when I thought I was making some headway on my own spiritual journey, I have hit this roadblock, and I'm trapped. I feel claustrophobic.


I'm sorry for the negative post, but I felt that I had to get this out of my head. People are finally, truly, pissing me off.


Love you all.




Peace be with you.

-truthseeker

reply to post by truthseeker1984


I went through that a long time ago.. when I was trying to atone for the horrible things I've done for whatever reason suited me at the time. It would be one personal crisis after another I would solve and people would take and take and take.. and one day a very good friend of mine, wise beyond her years gave me this analogy.

Right now you're walking a tightrope. All these people are falling around you for whatever reason.. self inflicted, maybe they just can't hang on any longer.. and you catch them. You catch them and carry them because you're a good person. You're a strong, self sacrificing person.. but your feet can only hold so much weight. they're getting bloodied and torn up on the tightrope and I don't know how much longer you can hold all these people up before you go plummeting into the abyss and them with you. You can't save everyone. Yes, you can save some people.. you can save yourself too. But you're not superman. Sooner or later you're going to slip and I don't want to see you fall because of all these people that either can't or won't help themselves.

I made a decision then.. I knew she was right. The world is full of takers and there's not enough givers. They'll find a giver and take and take and take until they're drained dry, bitter and empty just like them.. and then move on to the next juicy tomato. I'm not saying the world is just givers and takers. but I chose then to be real cautious about who I extended the full reach of my goodwill towards.. and I decided that at a certain point, that was enough.

A friend that threatens to cut off a friendship when you're run ragged isn't a friend at all and you don't need that kind of person in your life. A true friend would ask if you're ok and want to hang out and have a beer or something and just relax, turn off your cellphone and relax. No pressure, no questions, no bothering you for help. Just a reprieve, a bit of a shelter from the storm.

Sometimes you need to take a machete to your social life and carve out all the debris and foliage so you can make a path back to Sane City. True friends are friends through thick and thin. I think you'll know the kind you really need in your life.

Are any of you experiencing loss of balance at all?

It's really strange, I noticed over the last couple days, I have been bumping into things in my house, even though I am very oriented of my surroundings.

Anyone else experiencing this?