What Am I, Really? I'm Not Of This Human Species!

Maybe the title says a bit much, but who knows, really?

A registerred user on this ATS site gave me the "Will" to pursue this
thread, so I give credit where credit is due and that somebody is...
"gwydionblack."

I feel for you brother, honestly, I do. I have tried sooo many times
to open loved ones minds and hearts to the reality of what's real
and what's fake. Truth of the matter is.... none of "this" is real
nor fake, it's all an illusion. Like "The Matrix" says.... we were born
into bondage, as slaves. And that ladies and gentlemen, is what
truly resides within my heart.

Ever since I was a child, I had always questioned everything around
me, as human beings to a sense. What is this, what is that, as most
of us adolescence do, we question things, right? Well yes, we do. But
for some, it's easy to confirm whats "real" or what's "fake." For me,
and I'm sure for some of you, it's not easy.

For me, I have never, ever, been able to conform to the structure of
living that I was born into... heck, I've ever been able to conform to
the structure I was raised in. And yes, I'm sure many of you are
and have posessed the same traits, but with me, I consider myself to
be "open-minded," "self-reliant," not dependent on anybody. I lost my
father to cancer at the age of 18... 24 yrs old now. I accepted my
fathers death as an inevitable circumstance, of course, with emotion,
but not to the brink of breakdown. I have never been prone to drugs,
such as crystal meth, heroin, coc aine, although I was held at gunpoint
in the orders to snort a line.... I didn't. Never have I had a dependency
on "legal drugs," which were prescribed to me at a time, never took them.

As of now, (above paragraph was more based after my father passed) I
have done nothing but search for the "truth." I had a stable job, making
quite good/great income, here in California, with a nice brand new house
to live in. Nice car, great "friends," women, all that jazz. Only problem, I
felt as if I was being sucked in deeper and deeper into this so called
"Matrix" that some speak of. It got to the point where I finally surrendered,
and believe me, my thoughts at night before I fell asleep were bad, as I
"HAD IT SO GOOD," some would say. It was an on-going process of feeling
guilty, remorse, self absorbed, what have you, that finally got to the point
where I said.... "Screw It, I Give Up," this lifestyle is not for me.

As of where I stand now, I'm in the process of losing friends, close friends
too, who I have grown up with, who are certainly hoping to pursue the
income I once had, and who also seem to be getting caught up, deeper
and deeper into that matrix of a lifestyle. I currently reside with my mother,
my laptop (I love both so dearly) and am making a living off of "Flea-Markets," which may sound
bad, but really is a great way to "earn" your living without working for the
"MAN," know what I mean?

Anyways, when I was 11 years old, a family friend who is a "medium" and
has been since the early 80's, told me and my mother, I was from another
planet. Of course, as time went by, I had forgotten this statement, until
recently, putting the pieces together for who I am today, and the path I
have chosen to be who I am today, definetely raises the question....

Am I Seriously A "Soul" From Another Planet?

[edit on 22-2-2010 by Tek-Neek55]

[edit on 22-2-2010 by Tek-Neek55]

Hey, you are not alone.

I have never "fit in" and joined the rest of society. Just doesn't feel right, and it's easy to feel like an outsider looking in.

Hope you are able to find your place in this world......

Hell, maybe if "tshtf", us weirdos will be the only ones that know how to survive without "society" to take care of us.

reply to post by LostNemesis


Thank you for reading....

Lol, things are not what they may seam,

It's just funny how people like yourself feel the

same way. I mean, to not being able to conform,

I guess you can say, "population" has risen to an

all time high. But what if this is part of it? Part of

other beings being sucked into a "Prison Planet?"

Crazy it may seem, yes, but in all actuality, I can

say.... it MUST EXIST!

[edit on 22-2-2010 by Tek-Neek55]

reply to post by Tek-Neek55

Am I Seriously A "Soul" From Another Planet?

Maybe the title says a bit much, but who knows, really?

Well...who really knows...you answered your own question...I can relate to a lot of the things you speak of, and often feel as though I don't belong on Earth...there are a lot of us, and the numbers are rising...but I don't think you are an "Alien"...think about it, really...your mother obviously gave birth to you...therefore, your are genetically human...so what really makes you Alien?

IMO, it's our souls that are different...I don't want to sound like an egotist, but I've come to believe some souls are older than others...there is no such thing as an "Alien soul"...people posses certain soul ages...some people simply have a deeper understand of life and cosmic truth...I can usually sense if a person has an older soul even when they are very young...in fact, it's most obvious in children...there's just something about them...they don't fit in with other kids because they find other children incredibly boring, and often prefer the company of adults...they are extremely wise for their age and you can tell they are more "aware" or "enlightened"...whatever you want to call it...you can sense they have experience in the game of life...

It's apparent to me that the number of such people (some might call them "indigo children") are becoming more common in our population...almost as if they have come to Earth, knowing how much damage it could do to there soul, because we are entering a very important time period and they have a mission to complete...but who really knows?

[edit on 22/2/10 by CHA0S]

reply to post by Tek-Neek55


Can you fly? Do you get hives when you go near kryptonite? Were you a foundling?

Well.

I always wished that I knew why I didn't feel happy to slave every day away to make someone else rich. Like everyone else.

They mention things like big houses, expensive cars... And other things that make it "worth" giving up your life and energy. But, it still didn't seem worthwhile to me. Did you ever get that, too?
People seeming DUMBFOUNDED that you don't enjoy slaving your energies away, to make someone else rich?

Believe me, I wish it wasn't like this. It would be a LOT easier to feel happy just to wake up and head to work every day, than to see the world and "system" for what it is.

Seeing the traffic in the morning, and wondering how all these people function without the ability to think for themselves, and maybe question reality when they see everyone else hypnotically doing the same damn thing..........


lol weird much?

Originally posted by Alethea
reply to post by Tek-Neek55

 

Can you fly? Do you get hives when you go near kryptonite? Were you a foundling?

_________________________________________


---CHAOS---

I definetely see your point. Although, if there truly is a "soul," which
I believe there to be, why couldn't a "soul" come from another planet,
let alone another galaxy? Heck maybe another universe for all Im
concerned... lol.

---Lost Nemesis---

Yes, I am surely in the same shoes you are in. I don't "buy" into all
that crap. And it's funny, since I don't buy into all that, I'm labeled
a "nutcase" by others... mostly new associates I met with at my last
job.

[edit on 22-2-2010 by Tek-Neek55]

Just seems to me, most people go through a phase of "rebellion". And, when they read about people like us -- They simply think we are in a state of Rebellion, and will grow out of it.

My mom was the exact same way, and never grew out of it. Never once held a job.

I am.... 26, and have not grown out of it.

What do you think?? Others THINK they will not conform, but then they grow up, and develop an envy for people who do not join the system.

If you read in many threads on ATS, people will say exactly that. And you can tell they hold a strong resentment for people that don't work.

Is it jealousy? That they felt the need to "conform"? I was thinking about this earlier. People throw insults a lot around here...

EDIT: Damn typo.

I feel kinda strongly about this, understanding it, somehow. People, even here, throw personal insults.... at people like us.... So hope this thread doesn't go anywhere. LOL

[edit on 22-2-2010 by LostNemesis]

reply to post by LostNemesis


Lol. I believe it may. Even here on a site where people conflict with the "norm."

I'm sure there are many on this site though, that feel the same way!

I'm not sayin I'm special, I'm like anybody else..... but, wtf am I to
believe?

Just because I was born into this world, does that automatically
make me a new "soul" born into this world?

First of all, OP, I encourage you to keep your "wonder". Your words resonate with my experiences somewhat as well, but I would offer to you that those questions and the subsequent search for truth and beauty are part of the best of us -- that which makes us human.

Could you be nonhuman? Sure, why not? I don't have a dog in that race -- I think it's certainly possible. I'd suggest to you, in your search for truth, that you examine the similiarities as well as the differences, and perhaps be mindful of not seeking to feel ostracized.

I think we tend to view humanity as a whole, and apply various traits to them -- many of which most of us don't relate to/agree with individually. When we look at our own individual desires/interests, we see the inequalities around us, and who cannot be affected by the horrors that humanity perpetrates upon themselves and the planet?

All best, and keep looking with child-like eyes of wonder, unfettered by "common knowledge" or other peoples' truths.

Ohhh!!! I've found a bunch more friends to add to my ATS list. Hello there!

Are you guys ready to make a difference yet? Like you all I have felt like an outsider especially over the past few years. I grow apart from society daily. Once I was an active participant in the system, but have always been a questioning part of it. Then one day many years back I took a stand. I began speaking my truth to that which was true.

Just like a bad dream, those within the system stood up back to crush me. They wanted me back inside the box. "Jump back in it's better for you in here," they told me. They had group think like a mob of zombies all bent on controlling their own little power clique. How dare I speak and point out their lies.

As I grow steadily away from society it does not effect me as much as it used to. I have found my passion, the thing I can contribute back to our society. I have learned how to overcome, stand straight, and speak the truth even as the power of society to shut me down engulfs me. I stand inside like a pillar unwavering. I know what the truth is in my own little field of passion. What amazes me is how scared others are to do what I do. I usually find them later, breaking off from group think and coming to me privately to tell me they agreed with me. But did they give me water when I asked? No they did not. Did they take a stand with me? No they did not. I tell them that it is okay I understand why they didn't want to stick their neck out on the line in my defense. I tell them I understand that it would put them in harms way. I tell them I take a stand so that they don't have to.

I am not an alien though, I am a human. I'm not so sure about the others though.

reply to post by Tek-Neek55


for someone who makes such claims, your avatar is very worldly/cosmopolitan

Originally posted by Tek-Neek55

I'm not sayin I'm special, I'm like anybody else..... but, wtf am I to
believe?

Just because I was born into this world, does that automatically
make me a new "soul" born into this world?

Eh, who knows what to believe. I wonder if some people search for that exact meaning all their life, just to never find an answer....

Maybe you are truly original and unique, and an answer may be found. Maybe you are on some kinda mission on earth, here... Or, maybe you are just in search of *DIFFERENT* knowledge than everyone else.

Perhaps once you find that knowledge, it's your life meaning to share that knowledge with everyone else, who was set out to find something different. If there is a meaning in mass conformity, I don't know... But I hope they find it.

reply to post by ExPostFacto


Your post = Very thought provoking.

I wonder if some people are just meant to be a questioner, in order to make others THINK.

While yes, it does put an individual in danger to step away from the herd, they can learn from a lone sheep. Lol

Maybe someday these herds of sheep will wonder what WE observe, being separate from the herd. Since it's obvious, they can only see the arse of the sheep in front of them.

reply to post by Tek-Neek55


You're definitely not alone.

Now, I don't know about another species - I'm not sure that's accurate. But I feel the same as you and I'm 30[mumble mumble]...

Since I was a kid I've never understood why most of the people around simply "accepted" things as true or 'that's how it is'. I never fit in, I always felt 'different' - not special, mind you - just not accepting the same values and ideals that everyone else did.

And I've been like that since I was as young as I can remember. No UFO abductions, no abuse, no drinking or drugs or anything of that nature. Nope, was born this way. While I'm no conformist, some things you do need to do - like get a job. And while I truly, utterly and completely despise what I do for a living, it's one of the few jobs that pays a lot of money for a relatively easy type of work (compared to real jobs like doctors, law, military, public services, etc). It gives me the money to allow me to pursue things that truly interest me. A bit hyprocritical I know.

But i think many people are like this and quite possibly, more and more are 'happening' in the world.

Perhaps it's to do with the fact so many of us, or the society we live in, is so completely embroiled in mindless technology, useless overhyped media, items of no real worth or value and whatnot, that it's actually divorced us from 'Us' or 'It' or "whatever" that real infinite Energy is we all belong to. And perhaps it's that separation from something real and true, it drives us to rebel in the way we feel and perceive the world we live in...?

I dunno.

But as I said, you aren't alone.

[edit on 22-2-2010 by noonebutme]

[edit on 22-2-2010 by noonebutme]

reply to post by Tek-Neek55


Tell you what, I will tell you what you are, if you can tell me what I am! I feel just like you do, I too worked in the private sector, and had the house and cars, the woman, the drugs, the whiskey....all turned out to be fake. An accident took me out of the work force, and in some ways, this may sound crazy, but it did me a favor. Now I just repair computers in my rented house, and try my best to educate anyone who will listen to me. Like you, Tek-Neek, I was told a long time ago by two aunts whom I trust implicitly that I came here in a spacecraft, and the way they told it left no doubt in my mind. I think I may be the product of an Earth man and an alien woman, I know that my little 98 pound soaking wet Mother could not have carried a baby as large as I was, nearly 11 pounds at birth. I had to have three blood transfusions before I could even breath right. For me, I cannot wait to go back home. I know it will be real soon. don't know how yet, but I have learned to trust my instincts. Good post!

reply to post by Tek-Neek55


Hi Tek-Neek55,

Great post...

I can relate completely....I never felt like I belong here at all...I used to think I was adopted when I was a child because I never even fit in with my family...

Recently I've been having this strong urge to go home.....but I can't remember where that is....

Great post.
I would like to know how you guys deal with the fact that "the system" fights back, it holds you back and will not let go. Its not like one choose to change and its done...bills need to be paid, children food health ALL depends on you "working" your hours..slaving.
Its an evil circle, you need to work to pay basic bills, and to deal with the pain that generates one needs "things" and many times also some kind of drug/drugs, legal or illegal.

And Tek-Neek55
How do you do this without any kind of drugs, and for so many years?

Also i have started to think that our evolution is not about individual development, to be "unique" run faster or jump highier, sing better, act better than others, its the contrary..to evolve as a community were no one is "greater" than any other, were your neghibourgs wellbeing is more important than a baseball match or a tv program.
I look at earth from the eyes of an alien and i feel like watching ants evolving...like we are at a very very primitive stage. And i dont see how any alien or divine source would want to deal with us at this stage.
My only hope is that this nightmare ends when we die.

I just had to jump in on this one, everything said could apply to me!!

I've never felt that I was in the right place, or maybe time, growing up I never really rebelled just didn't want to do what was 'expected' of me.
Like playing with dollies and learning to be a good mum/wife/housekeeper, (which was expected of girls in the late 60's) even tho I did go that route for awhile it never felt 'right'.

I'm a little over 50 and a great disappointment to most of my family, I don't have the 'nice house, decent car, appointments with the hairdresser once a month, nice little nest egg in the bank for retirement' lifestyle they seem to think I should have.
I have a 'rented house, bucket of bolts, cut my own hair, broke' lifestyle that I like.
This means I have no debt and that I like even more.

I've also felt this urge to go home that many speak of, even though I don't think I am alien, at least my body isn't.
And like others I don't know where home is!

So, nope, you are definitely not alone, but I do wonder if these feelings we are all having are the product of 'society/technology' as in us not leading the sort of life that mankind was made/evolved for and whether people who live closer to nature (like grow their own and have little to do with anything larger than a village) have amongst them 'outsiders' like us.

PQ

I do wonder if these feelings we are all having are the product of 'society/technology' as in us not leading the sort of life that mankind was made/evolved for and whether people who live closer to nature (like grow their own and have little to do with anything larger than a village) have amongst them 'outsiders' like us.

I think it is everything we are exposed to in life. It is first in the DNA, the Genes that make up these bodies we all live within. The reverence for nature and mother Earth is a distant memory of a more free, more pagan lifestyle that some of us remember from many past lives. It is our parents, teachers, and those who first teach us, and it is the technologies we have and use every day, it is television and movies, radio and music, it is all of these these things coming together for us on a slightly higher level...I suppose one or two of you have noticed that you do not live exactly in the material world, nor in the Spirit World either, but kinda in-between? I have to do business in the material world, but I do not like it there, and I love the Spirit world, (The Ether) but can only go there sometimes, I cannot live there. So, I walk between the worlds. I hate money, but am fully dependant upon it to live, I hate corporations, but I work for one, (U.S. Government...pays me to be sick) and I cannot stand for anyone to try to force dogma on me, or treat me, or my family badly, and I do not like hearing so called "common talk." I love electronics, but hate cell phones, I love computers, but hate Microsoft, and anyone who garners (corners) a market and lords over it like a god.
It all seems to be a strict love/hate life I lead here, doesn't it? I have gained a great deal of knowledge over the years, but sometimes I wish I didn't have it all, and was blissfully unaware like most of the rest of the world is. Thank you, Tek-Neek55, LostNemesis, CHA0S, argentus, ExPostFacto, noonebutme, gusan, PennyQ, I have added all of you as my friends, and hope to further communicate with all of you. There is much to do, and a short time to do it in.