posted on Aug, 26 2009 @ 09:20 AM
Within two weeks these symptoms had vanished and I was feeling much better. This brings us to 4 days ago where out of the blue I decided that I was
wasting MY time and that I finally admitted I wasn't happy, roll on the withdrawal back into my shell. I decided to give myself 3 days of pure
thought on ME; the first day was spent watching some films I had seen before that had an impact in some way on my life. These films were "Human
Traffic", "Trainspotting", "Kidulthood", "Adulthood", "Instinct" and "Fight Club".
So what is MY conclusion? Why have I got you to read to this point? Simply to impart with my fellow "humans" which we ALL are even the so-called
elite MY opinion on what is really going on. For years I have hated YOU, feared YOU, pitied YOU, trusted YOU, loved YOU, blamed YOU, depended on
YOU... why? Because I have never been truly comfortable with myself. I have felt such extremes of boredom so many times and blamed YOU for not
helping me out of it... why do we not understand that boredom is such a privilege and an emotion that doesn't actually exist? Boredom should be a
time for reflection or rest, basically self improvement in any way, but instead we try to divert our attention away from problems WE have created in
OUR lives with anything we can. Why despite my large, intimidating size and high intelligence have I come to fear YOU and hate YOU? Simply because I
can't CONTROL YOU. I don't know how YOU are going to act around me, say to me, do to me etc. Sure I can get prompts through hypersensitivity and
natural survival instincts but I can't MAKE YOU DO WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO WHICH IS TO ACCEPT ME, BE COMFORTABLE AROUND ME, BEFRIEND ME all because I
CANNOT CONTROL YOU EVER and I NEVER should be able too.
I am no longer wasting my time worrying about an elite group of whatever they may be or the inevitable. I have NEVER had ANYTHING paranormal happen
to me in my life, never seen a UFO, never been visited by a dead loved one, you name it. I have always thought of myself as different to the rest of
you... I'm EXACTLY the same as the rest of YOU and YOU are EXACTLY the same as ME. Nurture may have programmed us differently and our environments
have shaped us differently but nature has made us the same. EVERYTHING we NEED we already have and WE WILL NEVER have EVERYTHING we WANT because we
have NO idea what we want and never will.
A message to the "controllers" of this fictional so-called civilisation we have made. You are HUMAN, you WILL DIE at some point and you will NOT be
punished for ANYTHING you do in this life because you are punishing yourselves RIGHT NOW. Living a life full of FEAR and ANXIETY and STRESS of the
loss of control and power and other things that DO NOT and HAVE NEVER existed in REALITY is an utter waste of life. Eventually YOU WILL DIE and your
ideologies may be carried on by your offspring, but as with everything they are subjective to interpretation and will mutate down the blood line as
your descendents either follow your instruction and add their little changes to your ideologies, hate you and choose another career or simply die
through natural selection - again something YOU CANNOT CONTROL. If nature wants us gone it will have us gone, we can run and hide but that simply
prolongs the fear factor, but if you're happy living a life of fear then so be it.
A message to the rest of you. Stop living in FEAR, accept death (which is the 3rd worst thing that can happen to you, 2nd being loss of a loved one
and 1st is imprisonment) as it WILL happen eventually. Your loved ones WILL DIE at some point, accept this fact and face it when it happens. WE are
ALL the SAME and have retracted so much from nature into our concrete shelters that we no longer understand this world. This has led to people
forming ideas that we are aliens and don't belong to this world. In MY opinion that is rubbish, you are here for NO SPECIFIC REASON, you ARE NOT
UNIQUE, you ARE NOT SPECIAL, YOU are simp