posted on Jul, 28 2009 @ 03:17 PM
Forgive me for putting this in the Survival Forum, but there was no other place that it really fit, and to be honest, this is a form of Urban
Daily we are inundated with news of arrests gone bad to the point where we have become numb to them. It doesn't take much to escalate a simple arrest
into yet another story for the headline news. Because of that, I thought it might be useful to give a practical manual for how to survive an
1.) From the very moment you are approached by officers of the law, mind your attitude. They are just looking for a reason, any reason, to pull out
their Pepper Spray, Taser, or Sidearm. Do not give them one!!! Every officer goes into a situation expecting the worst. Therefore, do the unexpected
and greet them with a warm welcome and civility as you would a neighbor or relative. Be more polite than you are on a first-date. You'll take them
off guard and instantly defuse the potential for the situation turning bad.
2.) Cooperate with the officer. Actually, go a step further and help them out by volunteering what you know they want. If they've been dispatched to
your location, there is nothing you can do to change that. However, your cooperation can go a long way towards making the officer who is just doing
his job treat you like another fellow citizen like him rather than mistreat you like a scumbag who needs to be taken off the streets. If they ask if
you have any weapons on you, don't just answer them, but show them...and go a step further by volunteering to allow them to search you if they would
like. Even if you have a dimebag in your pocket that you don't really want them to find, don't hesitate to empty your pockets. If you've been
friendly and cooperative, most officers aren't going to hold something trivial like a dimebag against you. Besides, even if they do, facing another
Criminal Misdemeanor charge added on to your original charge is much better than things turning hostile and potentially getting out of hand.
3.) Empathize with the officer. Again, they are just doing their job. They are human just like the rest of us and probably hate their daily routine at
work just like each and every one us does. While he is waiting for a response from dispatch or is filling out a form, say something like "Been one of
those days, huh?" This is one of those humanizing things that unconsciously forces the officer to empathize in return. He then realizes your day
sucks as bad as his, and is more likely to try to make the experience less painful than it usually would be for you just as you are doing for him.
4.) Don't argue with the officer. Yes, the officer might be wrong...and more often than naught they are wrong. Law Enforcement Officers are not very
versed in the law they are sworn to uphold, contrary to popular belief. If he is in the wrong, don't point it out. Leave that up to the District
Attorney to figure out (or to a Judge to figure out after your Lawyer points it out). I've been arrested a half-dozen times, but my charges were
dismissed almost every single time by the District Attorney because no actual crime had been committed. It's no biggie being arrested and detained
until you can post bail or are arraigned. It's much better than getting a Resisting Arrest Charge tacked on to your record, along with putting you
back into a bad rapport with the officer. When the officer explains what you are being arrested for, just smile...nod your head...and tell him that
you understand...and go along with it peacefully without protest. You can argue it when you get to Step 10.
5.) Thank the officer. What? Thank the officer who is arresting you? Most definitely yes! When the officer puts the handcuffs on you, genuinely thank
him for not putting them on too tight. When the officer opens the back door to his cruiser, thank him as if he was taking you on a date. When he opens
the door to the Booking Office, thank him. When he is done and hands you over to the Booking Officer, thank him and wish him a good day. Why? Because
he will tell the Booking Officer "This guy is a good guy. No trouble at all...very polite" and the Booking Officer will treat you just as well as
the Arresting Officer did. Also, both of them will remember you, which becomes important later down the road (see Step 9).
6.) Contact a Lawyer. Even if you have enough in your pocket to post Bail immediately, don't hesitate to use your free phone call to contact your
lawyer or to contact a family member who will call your lawyer for you. The sooner you get your lawyer involved, the better. If you are unfortunate
enough not to have Bail and it is a Friday evening, a lawyer can contact the District Attorney and a Judge and have you released prior to a formal
arraignment on Monday morning.
7.) Write down everything as soon after as possible. Recount every little action, every phrase said by either you or the officer and commit it to
writing. This becomes a preliminary deposition that will be invaluable as you go through the legal process. The sooner you have done this, the better
it looks to a Judge. Be sure to have it dated and notarized.
8.) Issue a Press Release. If your case is headed for Court, then it doesn't hurt to start prepping the Jury. Send a Press Release stating your side
of events to all media outlets. Don't overlook the power of Twitter and your Blog (or ATS). Press Releases show both potential Jurors as well as the
Judge that you had nothing to hide.
9.) Subpoena the officer. The District Attorney is counting on using the Arresting Officer as their primary witness. If you did everything right
listed above, then the Arresting Officer is probably more friendly towards you than towards the District Attorney. You can use that to your advantage.
Every case I've been involved in that actually went to Court was dismissed or I was found Not Guilty because I got the Arresting Officer to testify
on my behalf.
10.) Go to Court. Don't forget the little things like getting friendly with the Court Clerk, or being polite to the Baliffs, or keeping eye contact
and a smile with the Judge and District Attorney. Most of all, keep your mouth shut and do not speak unless spoken too. Never, ever, ever speak out of
turn and mind your manners. Keep your hands in front of you, clasped together, and keep your best poker face on with as sincere of a smile as you can,
even when things are said that may be wrong or downright lies. Judges smell BS a mile away...just let them do their job