Why do I get slapped down short of any success?

I have had enough. Any time I am close to any sort of success- be it playing an online game, or getting my life into some sort of order- (marriage, good job, etc etc)- I get screwed just short of my goals? And I mean stomped into a hole stopped. I always get blindsided by some insane thing I have no control over that kills whatever I am attempting with blazing speed and deadly efficiency.

And don't try to patronize me by telling me 'that's life'. Not when it's 100% of the time, it isn't. I have had nothing but failure- and I have worked so hard to NOT fail.... There are times, I swear I feel like I am the victim of some lunatic plot.... Even when I have the resources, the talent, and the know how, I get screwed. It gets worse... I watch ones with 1/10 the resources, no talent, and about as much knowhow as a loaf of moldy bread accomplish what I am unable to! and with NO problems.

Suggestions, theories, and constructive ideas accepted. The "that's life" crowd will be ignored wholesale. I already stated why this isnt 'life'.

Funny, thought I was the only one. One of my nicknames is "That Close" because I live exactly what you are describing. You should check into familiars and pshychic vampires. You're not the only one.

OP, I sent you an U2U on this issue.

reply to post by wylekat


Have you ever had a glimpse of the future via precognition in either a vision or a "dream"? If so, have you ever done anything to change that outcome whether it was to your favor or not? Have ever done anything that was to the detriment of someone?

Look into the concept of laws of karma. To let you know, I can say yes to all three of those questions and I do continue to pay the price.

Ever been a crime witness to a wealthy perp or organization. I am adding this one to this list of 'guesses'.

Yeah I know how You feel because the more I work the more I get taxed. I love how I will be dishing out an extra 10k this year because I made 10k over the tax bracket. I guess I am so rich huh?

Usually when it comes to jobs, it's not that surprising that people who hold those 'good' jobs are well-connected, knows someone who knows someone...etc even though they have no talent or skill to do the job well, or at all.

Evidence? Look at the state of the world today. The Rothschilds, Desmarias, Rocketfeller families (among others) control the world. In other words we have complete idiots and criminals who run the world.

We have butt kissers and money whores who manage our workforce, Unions who change terms of benefits without workforce consultations, who issue Union protocols in the most amazing legal mumbo-jumbo ever. I have a copy of the BC Hospital Employee's Union post-strike benefits/terms agreement book that has to be seen to be believed.

The legal jargon in that booklet is amazing.

This is why America/Canada is deteriorating, because of well-connected, worthless people with way too much power.

Not to p*ss you off but i have the exact opposite!! Don't get me wrong, i've worked hard since age 12 and i have an iq of 125 but i seriously never asked for anything or set any goals. But for some weird reason every thing seems to work out ,all the time.
My friends nicknamed me "lucky bastard", i have a job that is way (i mean way!!) above my education and somehow they seem pretty pleased with me 'cause i just been rewarded with a permanent contract. I've got a house that is way above standard were i live because i bought my previous house in a time when housing prizes were very low and made 150.000,- in 5 years when prizes skyrocketed. I met my soulmate when i was 14 years old and ended up marrying her and have three beautiful sons.....oh and i win every single board- or cardgame i play with friends.

Again this not to brag or p*ss you off but it has me puzzled aswell. I been trying to explain to myself aswell but i don't understand what it is.

I think the more you get fixed on one certain goal the harder it gets to reach it. It kinda like the way i used to study for exams. All my classmates would study for weeks or months but i opened my books the evening before my exams and started reading and not trying to understand what i was reading but more like reading a phonebook ( just like looking at the stars, out of the corner of your eye without focusing on a certain point you can see way more than looking directly at it). Just letting my subconscious take it in. When faced with the exams and still not knowing anything about the material i only had to assure myself that i took it all in and i could answer every question......A- every time!!!

I think in life this works the same....just look at life from the corner of your eye and you'll see a lot more. Don't get fixated on trying to understand the details but only know that balance is a given in any situation. If you work hard on something...reward will come BUT maybe not in the way you pictured and when fixed on a certain result you might miss it......

Just my two cents...

ps: sorry for all the typos, should have paid better attention in class..

It's nice to see I'm not the only person that seems to suffer from this curse. Usually though, it's me sabotaging myself. I take no crap from anyone, and unfortunately this practice has a high price associated with it..

I refuse to kiss people's butts, and typically speak my mind when I disagree. It doesn't matter if it's a boss, a powerful official, etc. I bet you do the same thing..

I just can't seem to get my lips to pucker up like so many other successful people I know. Sometimes I wish I could, but alas I just can't do it.. My only option is to accept the consequences of my own self-defeating nature.

reply to post by wylekat

slapped down
had enough
I get screwed
short of my goals
stomped
stopped
always get blindsided
I have no control
nothing but failure
I am the victim
I get screwed.

Do these words and phrases look familiar? They're all from your post. Very negative, passive. To be blunt, you should reevaluate your approach to life. Often a change of perspective can change your life. I'm not suggesting any hippy, New Age or psycho-therapy BS. I'm not saying life is fair.

You've got access to a PC. That indicates you are somewhere with heating, power and lighting. That you can check the replies indicates you are at home, at work, in College or in a Cyber Cafe. That you are on ATS shows an inquisitive mind. That's a few things that a lot of folk don't have in America. On the bell curve of domestic success, you are probably closer to the center than most.

The language of your post shows that you feel conspired against. The closing statements make it clear that you feel that you are more deserving than others of success. These are fairly irrational concepts to identify with. Ego and confidence are double-edged swords. Too much of either is as bad as too little.

Try not to compare yourself to others. You don't know them. Don't measure yourself against others. Life is mostly luck, effort and strategy. A positive attitude seems the best way to combine the three.

Originally posted by operation mindcrime
Again this not to brag or p*ss you off but

but.. that is exactly what you are doing. Try too understand the frustration and depression the OP has by posting this, and you chime in with what seems "Oh hey look at my life, how wonderful it is and I don't feel I have really earned it" to someone who is down like that. Instead of pointing out how great your life is, take a minute to look at what the OP is really posting.

wylekat - I know you don't want to hear "that's life" but...

It cannot be 100% all the time or you wouldn't be typing this message. You have succeeded more than you think. You yourself said " watch ones with 1/10 the resources, no talent, and about as much knowhow as a loaf of moldy bread accomplish what I am unable to..."

Imagine how horrible they would fail if they were up against the odds you are right now. Yes, some people succeed without earning it, it is handed to them. Call it life, call it luck, call it chance, rich parents, timing. Who knows. You might even be subconsciously sabotaging yourself. But do not look at the negative. Take some satisfaction in knowing how bad those less talented people would be if the world was equal.

This isn't meant to be negative, but positive. You may not be in control of the outcome of a situation, but you are in full control of how you handle it. Don't focus on failures, focus on how to avoid it for next time. No one can succeed all the time, most of us fail most of the time. George Washington, was not a good general at all. Defeat after defeat. But he did have 1 good victory. Abe Lincoln, more failures than success as well. But neither of them gave up. That is the key here. Do not surround yourself with negative thoughts of failure, how others brag about their so called "success". Surround yourself with positive thoughts because you are in full control of your own actions, which will be the groundwork to your future.

Originally posted by Shadow_Lord
but.. that is exactly what you are doing. Try too understand the frustration and depression the OP has by posting this, and you chime in with what seems "Oh hey look at my life, how wonderful it is and I don't feel I have really earned it" to someone who is down like that. Instead of pointing out how great your life is, take a minute to look at what the OP is really posting.

I understand just fine what the OP is saying and i'm trying to point out that he should not be so fixated on the results.
Believe me, i earn everything i have but i never asked for it!!

Maybe that's the problem. Being so focused on certain goals asks for a strong backbone. And if you find things not going your way maybe it time to change your goals?

If my storie were 180degrees the other way i would still be writing how great my life was. Even if i had to write this from under a bridge with nothing but the clothes on my back, i would still tell him my life is great and things were going my way......maybe it's a state of mind but as far as i'm concirned every day the sun comes up and air to breath is availible is a good day.....and maybe....just maybe....that kind of thinking gets you the things you think you want in life!!

sorry to have offended you, just wanted to give the good man an example of the other side of the story and how that isn't what he thinks he wants.

edit: typos....wish my native language were english

[edit on 19/1/2009 by operation mindcrime]

Ok I wont patronize you and tell you "that's life".
I will just say this.
Perhaps those things, although you think they are really important and what you really want so bad, are not what you really want or need at all.
Perhaps they are just not what you are here for, and you should look to some deeper meaning to find out exactly what it is you are meant to do.

It all builds character and should be used to your advantage to make you stronger. I owe NYS over $100,000 for their corrupt manipulation of their self serving manmade laws in which they ruled in their favor, even though it had nothing to do with me. I sent them plenty of letters telling them their criminals and should be put to death for treason and they will never receive a dime.

I'm facing 15 years in prison for a crime I didn't commit. There was and is absolutely NO shred of evidence that suggests I did it yet it's somehow mysteriously going to trial. they thought I would cop to a felony and do a few years(for something I didn't do) as if i was getting a bargain. I won't take it because I'm innocent. My 3 kids and wife suffer if I somehow get *snipped*. I walk about without a care in the world and fear nothing. Not even the 15 yrs.

I accidentally killed my best friend when I was 21 and live with the life sentence of mental torment.Turned to alcohol and drugs for years to try to cope ,which only got me in more trouble. I decided the substances made life worse, so decided to stop. I've been clean for 10 years of my own choice (not some court mandate). That's a harsh one to deal with, you never get over it but learn to manage. Some days are good some not, but I will tell you one thing. Anything is easier to deal with when your brain isn't clouded by alcohol and drugs.

I can go on and probably write a series of books (not a bad idea) on the subject and events of my life. My life is "trying" to say the least but I eat it and laugh and smile in the face of adversity. There's is nothing which will defeat me. Not even death.It's all a matter of attitude. Feel sorry for yourself and you will be weak. Refuse to give in and empower yourself. It's also how you look at it. Sometimes a certain situation which may seem negative is actually a blessing and putting you where you should be. Everything happens for a reason (sometimes good, sometimes bad). Hold your head up high and keep it real.

You aren't getting screwed over 100% of the time, you're just choosing to ignore all the good in your life and only focus on the positive. Ie. you mentioned marriage, then you must obviously have had a good girlfriend for quite a while... that's more than a lot of people have. Do you have a job at all while we're in the middle of a worldwide recession? Be thankful.

[
take a minute to look at what the OP is really posting.

Just took the time to read the rest of your reply and i can see you are really trying to be nice and helpfull to the OP but....

You just told this man in a round about way that "that's life"....

With all the rhetoric that comes with it.

I had no idea that we have an obligation to be nice and try to cheer people up. This is a discussionboard about weird and abnormal things. This is not weird or abnormal ,this man needs a personal coach. Somebody to tell him he is GREAT and that the world is his for the taking. And you are providing that service pretty well.

Peace

reply to post by Revealation


You just became my hero.....star for your story.(would buy the book when it's availible in stores)

To the OP : see....it can be done. Just a matter of relaying your focus on what you think is important....

Now go out there and be positive..

Tall people and good-looking people have been shown to get the breaks. Are you small and ugly?

There is also tons of nepotism and favoritism. I've seen lots of it. You can suck, but if you know someone... I mean, look at Bush.

Best bet is work for yourself. Then at least your boss can't screw you over about that long-promised promotion.

reply to post by operation mindcrime



LOL. It's unfortunately all true and to be honest I'm downplaying the severity and circumstances of the stories. I have definately lived a harsh 37 years of my existence (which most of it was my own fault) but have been getting the shaft even when I turned my life around. So much shaft you'd think I was gay.


Anyway I refuse to succumb to whatever it is and one thing about me is I love to win. I love the competition. I like the strategy of trying to figure it out. Many life experiences,and much knowledge and wisdom learned. I wouldn't change it for all the money in the world. Can't buy what I learned and you can't learn it from fancy schools or from even reading about it. Only comes from real life experiences.



[edit on 19/1/2009 by Revealation]

I know I told him "that's life". I also told him I know he didn't want to hear it, but that is what it boils down too.

Some people look at life, and what it throws at them. Other look at life as how they dealt with different situations. Even though someone says they do not want to hear it, it doesn't change the fact that they need to hear it to help them in the long run. He made it clear he didn't want to hear it, but what else can someone do? It's life, but it comes down to how you deal with life.