Why do I get slapped down short of any success?

reply to post by wylekat


Ditto on my end. If you find an answer U2U me. Maybe all us losers should form a group.

reply to post by operation mindcrime


I am curious, do you think you really do never have something "bad" happen to you? Or is it more that you dont fixate on what you didnt get, and instead look for the new opportunity in the situation that you are in?

Man - I've had my share of rediculous problems - didn't get a good start in life due to things out of my control.

But now that I can control my life - I'm lovin' every minute of it.

If you got your health - then count your blessings - cuz' you have what many would give everything for.

I have my health, don't smoke, and don't intend to give it away without a fight!

reply to post by Illusionsaregrander


Well ,in all honesty i can say i have bad things happen to me. But i tend to take them in with the good.
It's all about balance in life. And if i get up in the morning, spill my coffee over my brand new clothes. Stomp my toe on something hard (it's always something hard!!!) or have a flat tire in the driving rain with no spare .... i enjoy those moments....(pause)....really i do.
The trick is to realise that everything and i mean everything in life has a certain balance (light/dark, cold/warm/ happy/sad, good/evil) and that is good but if you are willing to enjoy the good i think you should also be ready to enjoy the bad, for it comes with it....

That's life.......

(by the way, the stumping you toe part. That takes the most effort to not swear and curse when it happens but you should try it....cry, laugh, anything but enjoy it. If anything, it;s a sign you're still alive!!!)


Peace

reply to post by operation mindcrime


I know these are just shallow examples of things going wrong in a person life but i can say this applies to the bigger things in life aswell. People i know who pass away, fatal accidents ,losing your job , losing your house etc etc..whatever.
I know this is a pretty bold statement to say :" just take it in for it's a part of life" and the next thing people are going to ask: "well, did you ever have things like this happen to you??".... i don't know!!!
I never really notice when bad things happen because usally there is always something else to look forward to or to be happy about and i tend to focus so much on those things that i don't really experience these negatives. It's like it happens automatically.
Sure i attended my share of funerals of dear ones and i even slept on the streets for some time but i can't say i remember those things a well as ohh lets say my marriage, my children being born, getting drunk when i was 15..etc etc.
"and what if something happens to your wife or children??"....That's maybe the hardest one i've come to struggle with since my first child was born. Ask my wife....i've had this conversation with her over and over again before we had children and she asked me what i would do if she died.
I'm honest so i reply every time, that when she goes i'll miss her but that's it. I don't think i would fall into a depression or anything. I'll just be glad for the time we had together but things happen.(by the way, i can advice against this method of replying to your wife. It's make for interesting bedtime conversation)
Now for my kids (3 sons) i hope that i die before they do but accidents happen and i know this but this is the thing (the only thing) that sometimes wakes me up at night.....weird isn't it?
All the other things that could seem of interest in a persons life. I don't care about them.
Maybe the most important part about being happy in life is not wanting things!! I never want anything and i don't expect anything. I like to help people and i'm always more than happy to help or give but i never want anything!! You can take away my car, my house, my job....i really don't care. The things that make me happy are the things you cannot take away from a person........

Peace.

oh ps: I posted my question in a thread on BTS about my weird view on life and not caring about death or other misery...check it out.

BTS - Mindcrime

reply to post by operation mindcrime


Thank you. I suspected that was the case.

I am not always as good as you seem to be about recognizing that a locked door might mean another is open elsewhere in the room. I tend to pout and stomp my feet a little.

But generally speaking, I have the attitude that what happens to you is not "bad" no matter how it might feel in that moment, that within it there is some opportunity for you for something that is better suited for your truest self.

I am 3/4 of the way to the way you live. I still try to impose my will on the world, and I still try to control outcomes too much, but I also have a real recognition that my way isnt necessarily the best way. Even if it does piss me off in the moment sometimes when I dont get what I think I want. I do remember a short while later to look and see what IS there for me. And so far, I havent been disappointed.