Help Me Pay it Forward

I don't mean to be dense, but what kind of hat are you talking about that costs forty dollars and becomes dilapidated in 96 hours?

Cowboy hat?

Fedora?

Porkpie?

This is the image I came across that would give an idea of the type of hat it was. It did not have Fall Out Boy on it, but it was this style.



Yes, hats are expensive.

Here's a very interesting story in this vein:

For 26 years, a man known only as Secret Santa has roamed the streets every December quietly giving people money.

He started with $5 and $10 bills. As his fortune grew, so did the gifts. In recent years, Secret Santa has been handing out $100 bills, sometimes two or three at a time, to people in thrift stores, diners and parking lots.

He is Larry Stewart, a 58-year-old businessman from the Kansas City suburb of Lee's Summit, Missouri, who made his millions in cable television and long-distance telephone service.

His holiday giving started in December 1979 when he was nursing his wounds at a drive-in restaurant after getting fired. It was the second year in a row he had been fired the week before Christmas.

"It was cold and this car hop didn't have on a very big jacket, and I thought to myself, 'I think I got it bad. She's out there in this cold making nickels and dimes,"' he said.

He gave her $20 and told her to keep the change.

"And suddenly I saw her lips begin to tremble and tears begin to flow down her cheeks. She said, 'Sir, you have no idea what this means to me."'

Stewart went to the bank that day and took out $200, then drove around looking for people who could use a lift. That was his "Christmas present to himself." He's hit the streets each December since.

www.cnn.com...

It is more blessed to give than to receive.

Acts 20:35

Originally posted by GradyPhilpott
"It was cold and this car hop didn't have on a very big jacket, and I thought to myself, 'I think I got it bad. She's out there in this cold making nickels and dimes,"' he said.

What a heart warming story. This here part was what did it for me. Sometimes we blow our own problems up into these catastrophic events. We fail to see how we may be far well off then some of the people around us. No matter what amounts of adversity are thrown our way, we need to remember there is always people that have it far worse.

Man that article brought a smile to my face. Thank you for that Grady.

Our town has a secret Santa program through our counseling center. Every year kids or their parents can write a Christmas list and submit it, then a family or group of friends can adopt that family and provide gifts for them. I have been doing it for a couple of years. Last year we had a single mom and her 8 year old son. When I got his list I started to cry, he asked for books, school clothes, pajamas and a few toys. He had been living in a motel with his mom for 2 years.

It breaks my heart that any child would be too poor for Santa to visit. I look at my four kids, in their warm beds, surrounded by too many toys, too many clothes, and I wonder about all the children out there who just give up after time and expect nothing.

I try to do things all year around too but I tend to go into overdrive at the holidays. One of the nicest things I've ever seen is when my sister not only put money in the Salvation Army kettle but then said to the bell ringer, "You look cold, I'm going to get a coffee, may I please get you a coffee, tea, or hot chocolate?" The bell ringer accepted and then my sister delivered. Sometimes it's not just the money but the show of genuine concern.

Also, next time you see a vet selling poppies outside of the grocery store, don't just give them money but stop a moment and say "thanks" and asked them where and when they served, give them a little bit of your time.

I've participated in the same sort of program aswell this year. My girlfriend and I had anticipated picking up some food items and gifts for a sponsored family, but we were contacted and asked to simply provide whatever money we could to help out. The children has made a list of some items they wanted, which makes more sense, and a few volunteers had stepped up to go to the stores and pick these items up. We donated $40 to the cause. Alone it is not going to make their christmas, but if everyone involed offered what they could, these children could appreciate a christmas like no other.

With the holiday season approaching, Paying it Forward takes on a whole new perspective.

Heart warming thread Chissler.
I try to adapt this in to my life and I find rather often that people become suspicious of "good will".
But here's one no one has the least knowledge of.

My ship was at port in CasaBlanca, Morocco, loading anchor chains, time came to serve lunch and the Captain told me to serve the Muslim guard pork together with the rest of the crew. He laughed believing I'd fallow orders.
I was appalled made up some veil and gave the poor guy sitting out on deck a grand meal and a huge pitcher of lemonade.

It was so cruel they stood there grinning thinking he was eating pork.

I didn't oppose verbally, life at sea can be rather rough when you're the only woman aboard, but you can get back at people in other ways.

WIS

Not sure if anybody has caught this, but Oprah's episode today is based completely on the principle of Paying it Forward.

The latest story was of a 68 year old man who had 9 brothers and sisters. He was not able to go to school, since he had to stay home and care for his siblings. Nowadays he walks 8 miles to and from school to learn to read, and is currently able to read at a grade 1 level. What this lady did was take money that Oprah had given her to purchase books for this man, so he would have some material to read in his own home. I thought it was a great story and it left a warm sensation in my stomach.

What Oprah did a few weeks ago was give everyone in the audience $1000. The only rule was they could not spend the money on themselves. They had to Pay it Forward and spend this money on someone else.

Two women joined forces and took their $2,000 to assist a home that helped women. They went to their local chains of big industries to see what they could get to help these women as well, and well they were welcomed with more than open arms. They turned their $2,000 into $200,000, which all went to help the women in this home. The name escapes me, but the figures do not. This too was a great story.

Another one was of a single woman who had lived in an abusive relationship for years. She was scared of leaving him for fear of her life. Well on Christmas eve one year, he picked her up and proceeded to shoot her in the face. She survived but was left with extensive disfigurement. One lady from the audience took her money and gave it to her. Their interaction amongst one another when the money was offered was a tough one to handle while keeping a dry eye.

I hope some other members actually had the opportunity to watch this. It was a great, great episode.

Quick story.

During an appartment block fire in Dubai,summer gone,I exited my appartment via the bathroom window and an internal ladder 3 floors down to the 1st floor.Upon reaching the bottom I found 3 slight built Sri lankans unable to open the LOCKED!! fire door.
After opening it ''Geordie style'' one of the guys assisted in alerting the rest of the building(no smoke/fire bells/emergency lighting... ie complete messup)..

He was so grateful to be alive he called up to my appartment every week with an offer to maintain/clean it.. Knowing he wouldn,t take any money for doing it I declined his offer until my final evening there..

I gave him a small amount of cash under duress insisting that it was just spare dirhams I wouldn,t change back in UK.
I gave him my appartment key,after I cleared out work equipment/luggage etc,and asked him to give it a quick clean and return the key to the building manager
I told him he could keep anything he found in there and I left in a taxi to my departing place.

Inside the appartment was 4 years worth of collections of cd,s/dvd,s/furniture Tv/hifi/spare laptop/exercise equipment etc.
No name exchanged.. no thanks required..

I was hating the Idea of a necessary return to UK but I left feeling I,d actually helped improve someones life just a little.

I try and tell jokes at grocery store and give spare booze and change to bums (or people who dress like bums and fool me lol)..... but honestly I don't think a few "good deeds" will win out in the end. It's always about survival of the fittest. That's just part of life.

Originally posted by Scramjet76
but honestly I don't think a few "good deeds" will win out in the end. It's always about survival of the fittest. That's just part of life.

Ever hear the cheesy quote, "To the world You may be only one person, but to one person You may be the world", well I incorporate this with Paying it Forward. Were not going to solve world hunger, we are not going to create world peace, but for one person, we may make their day a little bit easier. Someone who is in the dumps over something, we may be able to turn their day around.

Nobody here is trying to change the world. Were just trying to help out someone who needs it.

This has nothing to do with survival of the fittest. Paying it Forward is random good deeds for, sometimes, complete strangers. Just helping someone get through the day. Nothing more.

This has nothing to do with survival of the fittest.

Well from the point your arguing that is correct. Forget about saving the world and just do what you can.... i.e. give a guy in need the change in your pocket.

But in the larger picture that's not going to save society from the huge inequality gaps that continue to plague it.

Originally posted by Scramjet76
But in the larger picture that's not going to save society from the huge inequality gaps that continue to plague it.

And I don't think anyone who Pays it Forward would argue that point. Like I said, none of us actually think we can change the world. But we may be able to brighten someone's day. Which is, our sole purpose.

I alone can not save society. But I alone, can do a lot to help several individuals.

In the end, is the outcome any less?

I too pay for winos' jugs at the package store, when they are short of dough; but Im not sure this is "paying it forward". It may alleviate the pain for awhile, but in the long run I may be contributing to their addictions and ultimate death. But perhaps if I was in their place I would rather have a respite from the demons too. I also give them a couple bucks for food but I doubt if it ever gets used for food. Maybe.

Around this time of year I really like to give to organizations that provide toys for poor families with kids and food. We should support charitable organization all year except for the Red Cross that use most of their contributions for fat salaries for the excs and perks for the board members.

Think Locally!

"You have voted chissler for the Way Above Top Secret award. You have two more votes this month".

I'd like to congratulate you chissler on not only starting this thought invoking thread but also the actual 'act' of "paying it forward".
There is no greater joy than to see a persons face light up when you help them out. You can't put a price tag on the feeling it emulates back either.

There is one particular personal instance that stands out in my mind. About a year ago I was driving back home (about 5pm) and was at a stop light. I happen to look at the side of the road and there was an elderly woman standing near the corner. She wasn't holding a sign, and she wasn't coming up to cars or trying to get their attention in any shape or form. As I drove by when the light turned green I noticed that she had a semi-confused/distraught look in her gaze that wasn't directed really in any direction...

I decided to pull over into the parking lot of a strip mall across the street to check her out a bit more closely. I don't know why I did it, maybe because she looked like my elderly grandmother before she died. I always carry a pair of binoculars with me as I like to watch the skies whenever I get the chance. I could see that she was probably 85 to 90 years old and dressed in what I can only describe as maybe something like a gypsy type dress/attire, or in the least real old fashion clothing from the 'ol country (where ever that may have been). She stood on that corner without moving for maybe 10 minutes still with that far-away gaze of somewhere (or nowhere) distance.

I couldn't sit in my car any longer just wondering as the curiousity was at a boiling point. I got out of my car and crossed the street over to where she was standing at. I don't even know if she was aware that i had walked up next to her when I said "Hello" to her. She didn't answer me and her gaze was still some where else so I repeated myself, "Hello there, are you ok?" Her head dropped down a bit and nodded her head to both sides, "no" she said in a almost whisper, "I'm not" still not looking at me. It was a rather cold day and she really didn't have any type of protective 'overwear' on and I could tell that she was shaking a little. I asked if she would like to have a cup of warm coffee or tea as there is a McDonalds about 200 feet away. She nodded yes, but still would not look at me. I took her by the arm and we went inside the McDonalds and ordered up some hot drinks and then we sat down at a table. After a few sips she had finally stopped shivering and so I asked if she lived nearby. She said "I live down by the river in a moblehome" still not looking at me. I asked if she had lived there long and she replied that she had lived there for about 10 years by herself "but won't make much of a differance in a few days". I asked why and she replied, "that the cost of living there was too much for her on her limited income". I also found out that she had been living without electricity for the past three weeks as the electric company had shut if off for being deliquent in payment. I asked if she had called them to let them know what her situation was like. She informed me that her telephone had been disconnected four months prior. I then inquired as to why she was out on this street corner. She said that she had seen beggars stand on the street corner asking for money to help get by... but she couldn't bring herself to ask anyone. I asked how long she's been standing out there to which she replied "I've been out here the past three days but no one has given me any money". All during this time she not once looked at me and I could only imagine that she must have been terribly embarressed of her predictiment and I also assumed that she was having trouble with maybe a pride issue and thats why she wasn't foolowing thru with the actual act of begging. "I really can't bring myself to go up to someone and ask for money, but I come down here all the same" she tells me. "Well do you have any kin folk nearby that might be able to help" I asked? "I do have a daughter that lives in Texas, but I've not heard from them for several years, and I wouldn't want to be a burden to them". Well I can tell you that my heart is really breaking for this little old lady and I bought her a hamburger dinner while she continued to tell me how bad off she was and how she didn't know what she was going to do.

So let me make this long story short as the rest of the nite I was consumed in trying to help her out. I have a friend that is the manager of a small hotel with a small kitchen and mini fridge in it and contacted him and worked out a deal with him since he owed me a few favors and so got her a warm place to stay for however long it took to get her back in her place with electricty and the phone back on. I stocked the room with about 5 days worth of food, and told my buddy to be sure to check on her daily and if she needed anything to just make a tab up for me that I could re-imburse. After some coaxing I finally found out the name of her daughter and tracked her down and told her of her Mother's predictiment and the hotel room that she was staying at. Her daughter was shocked and surprised that her Mother was so bad off as "Mom" had never said anything to her. They agreed to come down as soon as possible (that week) to help her out and if worse came to worse they would take her back to Texas with them. She thanked me for letting her know and looking out for her.

My excursions require me to travel away quite abit but I gave the little old lady $50.00, my phone and cell number and address (as I did also with the daughter) and told her she could call me anytime and not to hesitate at all, that it was no bother at all, and that when I got back into town the following week I would check up on her. About 4 hours has transpired and I'm pretty well dog-tired (as I'm sure she was too). I made my way to the door, I said, "you know, everythings going to be just fine and work out". Then she broke down and started to cry, she hobbled over to me and gave me a long hug and just kept crying as she clutched me. I started to cry to, I don't know why, I just did.

Her daughter arrived in the next couple of days and moved her back to Texas from Calif. I've gotten a few cards from them and she is doing better now. I've adopted her as my step-grandmother and she refers to me as her 'Sunny Boy'

Oh I almost forgot to tell you, her first name is 'Hope'

Speechless. I only wish I was good enough with the english language to explain exactly how I feel after reading that.

THAT is Paying it Forward.

You are a good person, and over these holidays, I sincerely wish you and your family all of the best.

I am not a rich person, I do not come from a rich background. I always came from a family who made slightly more than minimum wage, and always managed to pay the bills. I'm currently a student on a fixed income that allows some flexibility, which is good.

But between now and Christmas, I plan on taking a few $10 or $20 bills and walking around my neighborhood. Complete random strangers I am going to pass them out to. My only request is that they must be a young child and I am asking them to spend it on themselves.

Too often I see children that have nothing. Hopefully a very small donation from a complete stranger, for absolutely no reason at all, may brighten their day.

I feel compelled to share this story with everyone. It was very small, took no effort whatsoever, and just may of made a big difference in someone's life.

My girlfriend and I were on our way to Sobeys today to pick up a few things. Nothing much, just in and out really. On the way in, there was a rough looking character sitting against the side of the building. He seemed to be having a rough day, and a worse week. People were walking by left and right as if he did not exist. As we approached the man, my girlfriend looks him right in the eye and says, "Hi, How are you today?" There were no gratuities either, as she paused and waited for a reply. The man said, "Fine, Thanks!" and broke a smile. She nodded her head and kept walking. It really caught me off guard. For one, we were in the middle of a conversation and I bemoan to say that I actually did notice the man either. When we entered the store I asked my girlfriend why she had stopped? She responded with how I am always talking about doing good random acts, and whatnot, so she took advantage of the opportunity. She mentioned a show recently where different individuals were saying how nice it felt to have a stranger simply acknowledge their existence, rather than walking over them as most do.

It really warmed me up inside hearing her talk about why she had done, what she done.

Took two seconds and may of made a difference in an individual's life.

As the title states, Proud of my girlfriend!



[edit on 14-2-2007 by chissler]