First off I don't know where this should be posted but, more so when I was younger, I would get the feeling that I was on the verge of discovering something about the universe / myself / world.

I am not spiritual by any means of the word but, this feeling I have still comes around once in a while.

When do I get it? I guess you could say at moments of "hope". I really don't know how to describe it but, I'll try.

When I got my first telescope and realized the universe was so large and we as a species so insignificant. When I would watch something like Star Trek where the possibility of a limit-less tomorrow was unfolded. Alone, reading a book in a quiet house.... I guess it's like this tremendous "upwelling" of hope, desire, posibility, awe.

Now some of you may think this is a religious experience or that I'm off my rocker. Neither. I'm pretty even keeled. Like I said, I really don't know how to describe it.

I know that I mentioned Star Trek and Astronomy too and yes I am a Sci-Fi junkie, but this feeling is like nothing I've ever felt before.

It's almost like an uncontrolled yearning for something more... definative.

I have read the bible and the koran. I've studied philosophy, history, science... yet... none of them explain the hunger(?) for answers.

I don't know if I've explained it well or just made myself look like a fool but, if anyone's felt the same thing... let me know...

I'm not opposed to a spiritual answer but I'm not a spiritual person...



[edit on 11-3-2005 by wetwarez]

[edit on 11-3-2005 by wetwarez]

Ok, my bad. I guess no one has that feeling.

I don't think I described it well but, I'm just looking to see if it means anything or if it's just a natural feeling that anyone else has...

It is awesome when you look at the stars and the vast universes out there (no telescope, i use my imagination)

Its not a religious experience, i would say its more the miracle of it all. I am also ashamed to admit that i thought i was invincible, that everyone else's fate was to die EXCEPT ME.

Its good to wonder what lies outside the universe and i feel sorry for people who dont care. And there are plenty of them i know.

Continue expanding your horizons by searching the sky.

Who knows, we may come from out there somewhere...

dgtempe,

Like I said before, I really don't know how to discribe the feeling.... I guess, bundle all of your awe/majesty/sadness/wonder/hope and other such feelings into one and ball them up right in your chest, to the point you want to explode but, there is no outlet.

Sometimes I think I'm just going crazy at those times, but emotionally, it's almost like a depressing high(?). Almost like I'm manic and depressed at once.

When I try to analyze the feeling it's almost like... well I see a bright future for humanity but, sadness because I'm not there or can't get there.

I have no idea if I'm even getting an approximation of the feeling across but... I don't know how else to describe it.

Originally posted by wetwarez
You may be right... but I often find myself at a loss for words. Even trying to explain it to someone else is almost an impossibility because it always sounds "contrived" in some way.

Don't answer if you don't wish to, but how old are you? I'm guessing in your 20s, but bright and mature for your age? I ask this because I actually think you're expressing what you're feeling just fine. But in reality, there are no words to express feelings, when you think about it. How do you describe love? In words... Or sadness. They're indescribable, they're just beyond words, but we just do our best.

I often consider our place in the universe and feel myself at a dead end. I mean I think I was born at the wrong time. I don't fit.... My ideas thoughts and beliefs have often ostracized me to the point of singularity.

That is really beautiful (in my opinion). I have been considering myself a misfit since I was about 9, I think. I still am. I have never fit and I've come to the point of acceptance and pride in that. For a long time it was just me. Then I happened to come across another misfit that I fit with. I could have lived my life alone just fine, but I'm happy to say that once I accepted the fact that I could do it, I didn't have to. But sometimes now, I feel it's me and him against the world.

I'm not very gregarious so I find that any discussions on the topic at all very few and far between...

I hope you find some here that you enjoy. This is really my only outlet for discussions like this, too. There are some really cool people here.

Originally posted by Benevolent Heretic
Don't answer if you don't wish to, but how old are you? I'm guessing in your 20s, but bright and mature for your age? I ask this because I actually think you're expressing what you're feeling just fine. But in reality, there are no words to express feelings, when you think about it. How do you describe love? In words... Or sadness. They're indescribable, they're just beyond words, but we just do our best.

OK, I must not be describing it that well at all if I come across in my 20's. I'm 31 and married. But, this is one of those feelings even a spouse couldn't uderstand. I mean I've tried explaining it... no good... Blank look and a false smile...

How do you express a feeling that... profound. I guess the closest I could come is via a movie.

Did you see Contact? At the end where she's describing what she's witnessed... is close... but still pales in comparison....

Again, it's not just because I'm a Sci-Fi junkie... I consider myself to be pretty level headed... but this feeling is almost "paintful" it's so strong.

Hunting Veritas
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE watch, in fact I urge you to watch. Just to point out I was NOT a spiritual person until I watched the below lecture.

I've viewed such material before, infact, I've studied theology and philosophy extensively... I don't find it holds what I "need". Though I appreciate thoughtfulness I don't follow the "chakra" or "third eye". I have no problem with those that do but I don't follow the same belief's.

Please don't take it that I'm dismissing it out of hand but, I am not a "follower".

I don't want this thread to really take on a religious bent. Like I said, I'm not opposed to a religious answer but, for me, I'd at least (in my mind) have to find it plausible.





[edit on 11-4-2005 by wetwarez]

Originally posted by wetwarez
I've viewed such material before, infact, I've studied theology and philosophy extensively... I don't find it holds what I "need". Though I appreciate thoughtfulness I don't follow the "chakra" or "third eye". I have no problem with those that do but I don't follow the same belief's.

Well to be truthful I wasn't saying to believe I just showing you a lecture you might enjoy but not to worry

I really don't believe in anything its just after watching all eight lectures I found it broadened my horizons so to speak.

Please don't take it that I'm dismissing it out of hand but, I am not a "follower".

Well I'm not a follower but I am a practitioner, in fact I have no religous belief specifically I just like to learn as much as possible from every side of anything.

I don't want this thread to really take on a religious bent. Like I said, I'm not opposed to a religious answer but, for me, I'd at least (in my mind) have to find it plausible.

Well thats the thing I was saying about "What the bleep do we know" ANYTHING is possible if YOU want it to be or to put it bluntly "positive thinking". I wasn't trying to give a spiritual or religious answer just trying to spread some light.

Originally posted by wetwarez
OK, I must not be describing it that well at all ...

Not necessarily, I think more likely my perception is off. It's hard to guage these things over the Internet. But the more you talk about it, the more I'm understanding.

Did you see Contact? At the end where she's describing what she's witnessed... is close... but still pales in comparison....

Yeah.

Again, it's not just because I'm a Sci-Fi junkie... I consider myself to be pretty level headed... but this feeling is almost "paintful" it's so strong.

Ah... painful. That tells me something. Just tell me if I'm on the right track here and then I'll go into it further. Answer these questions (they are unrelated to each other) before thinking about or analyzing them:

Does it feel like you have a strong need in your life (maybe that you're not even aware of) that's not being met?

Do YOU think this feeling has a supernatural origin?

Do you have an idea of what this feeling is?

And Hunting: No need to apologize at all! It's a great film, I just thought - how serendipitous that we both mentioned that in the same thread when I haven't seen it anywhere else. And I don't believe in coincidence.

Originally posted by Benevolent Heretic

Ah... painful. That tells me something. Just tell me if I'm on the right track here and then I'll go into it further. Answer these questions (they are unrelated to each other) before thinking about or analyzing them:

Does it feel like you have a strong need in your life (maybe that you're not even aware of) that's not being met?

Do YOU think this feeling has a supernatural origin?

Do you have an idea of what this feeling is?

Need? yes... for answers, for.... more. For meaning.....

Supernatural? No... I don't believe so. It more like a subconcious upwelling of... emotion

Idea? Not really... like I said, it's hard to describe. As I said earlier, I feel... disjointed in time I guess you could say. Like I don't belong here (before you ask, I'm not depressive nor suicidal).

Hunting Veritas

Well thats the thing I was saying about "What the bleep do we know" ANYTHING is possible if YOU want it to be or to put it bluntly "positive thinking". I wasn't trying to give a spiritual or religious answer just trying to spread some light.

I believe that anything is possible, quantum states/M-theory/Special Relativity, all lead me to believe that it is. As far as what I want to be? Smarter, more knowlegeable about EVERYTHING. I am a "Positive Thinker" but, even someone with a positive attitude has down time.



[edit on 11-4-2005 by wetwarez]

Originally posted by wetwarez
Need? yes... for answers, for.... more. For meaning.....
It more like a subconcious upwelling of... emotion
I feel... disjointed in time I guess you could say. Like I don't belong here

I apologize if this sounds mundane or not at all what you were hoping to hear, but this sounds (to me) exactly like a mild panic attack.

Of course, I could be way off base. I have no attachment to being right about what you're feeling. But when I put all these together: Need, longing, unknown, subconscious, upwelling, emotion, disjointed... I get panic. Just slight panic at not knowing... panic is not necessarily fear, but there is an element of fear or feeling like something isn't right.

Any of that ring true?

(before you ask, I'm not depressive nor suicidal).

Never entered my mind.

Originally posted by Benevolent Heretic
I apologize if this sounds mundane or not at all what you were hoping to hear, but this sounds (to me) exactly like a mild panic attack.

No need to apologize... Quite the contrary, I'm grateful that someone's taken interest...

As far as panic? Again I think I've failed to describe the feelings correctly. I don't feel "danger" or "threatened" as in a panic situation neither does it feel like a panic attack. I guess you could say it feels like... well imagine as a kid getting your favorite toy at Christmas combine that with falling in love and acing a final in college. Follow that with a sense that something just beyond your perception is "going" to happen. Almost like you're on the verge of a great feeling of enlightenment or discovery... but, it vanishes, to be replaced by a subtle... empty feeling. Almost like you're missing somethig greatly but you can't exactly put your finger on it.

I don't know, best I can do... not better than the other descriptions, but.... maybe a little more... "descriptive".

Man! That is such a good description! It sounds like moments of euphoria.

Can you remember any significant time in your past (youth) when someone (a parent, perhaps) told you to not get too excited, not too get too happy, like a warning? Implying that if you get too happy, things will fall apart...

You don't have seizures, do you?

Originally posted by Benevolent Heretic
Man! That is such a good description! It sounds like moments of euphoria.

Can you remember any significant time in your past (youth) when someone (a parent, perhaps) told you to not get too excited, not too get too happy, like a warning? Implying that if you get too happy, things will fall apart...

You don't have seizures, do you?

Uhhh... no... I'm not epileptic if that's what you mean....

It's not anything medical as far as I can determine. And as far as my parents... my mom was really the only one that came close to understanding any of it. My dad could care less.

As far as happy... or a euphoric feeling... I guess you could describe it as a euphoria like experience except the downturn after the feeling....

I really can't characterize it....

Originally posted by wetwarez
And as far as my parents... my mom was really the only one that came close to understanding any of it.

So you've always had this?

As far as happy... or a euphoric feeling... I guess you could describe it as a euphoria like experience except the downturn after the feeling....

I asked about your parents because sometimes people tell their kids, "Don't get so excited" or "Don't you get too happy" like a warning.

IF you had a similar experience, that could explain why the good feeling stops and is followed by a downturn.

But I don't think I've ever had that exact feeling. It doesn't sound too bad, though. Most people don't ever get to feel the awe and wonder that you describe.

Sorry I couldn't help.

Originally posted by Benevolent Heretic
Sorry I couldn't help.

But you did... nothing to be sorry about.... talking about it helps. Still find it odd though.

Maybe psychotropic drugs could help...