I saw a Man with a Tat on His Big Fat Belly it Wiggled Around Like Marmalade Jelly

D C Talkin
A nice synopsis for Jesus Believers in the Catholic Church, did you know

The confessional says to confess and be saved on it......the Church wants to tell us what Scripture means for us and not many read the Bible for themselves........at Communion the bread transforms into the actual flesh of Jesus.....till it's put back in the container.....the cups that hold the communion wine are wiped with a holy cloth very meticulously, in the view of the congregants....so they can be assured that none of Jesus actual blood is wasted.....

Jesus is kept in the hut behind the alter.....Priests are forbidden to seek a wife.....Mary is the Mother of Jesus, and special among women but ......Catholic members of the body of Christ are told often to repeat the familiar phrases....and the familiar prayers.....repeat em again.....

Father, call the leaders Father......tithes of grain in Scripture are turned into the Church leader of the day telling the parishioner how much of his paycheck to remit for a true authentic save your soul tithe.....the book they're told is the Bible is not a Bible it is missing 18 verses that speak of true salvation, and comes from a work that has in it's front page a disclaimer stating it is not a definitive interpretation and should not be thought of as an actual translation.....

I saw a Man with a Tat on His Big Fat Belly, it Wiggled Around Like Marmalade Jelly

It took me awhile to catch what it said coz I had to match the rhythm of his belly with my head

JESUS saves is what it raved in a typical tattoo green, he stood on a box in the middle of the city and said he had a dream

We know the members of the Church are faithful believers....and are saved and Heaven bound, we wish the Catholic members would get out of the cult that thrives there but it's not happening. Scripture ya know tells of a man on the Earth getting in the way, because he wants to sit on a golden throne between the cherubs wings.....and be called God on Earth. He likes Purple and Scarlet and wants his staff to bow....often

Is there anyway we can get the membership of that fine group to read the Bible for themselves, study it to show themselves a workman that need not be ashamed, having rightly divided the Word of Truth!

That's all it takes, hey....Martin did that way back and posted a notice on their front door......do it again!

And don't be slow about it !!


There was a man from the desert with naps on his head

The sand that he walked was also his bed

The words that he spoke made the people assume

There wasn't too much left in the upper room

With skins on his back on hair on his face

They thought he was strange by the locusts that he ate

The Pharisees tripped when they heard the words that he spake

Till the king took the head of the Jesus freak

It took you a while to catch what it said cuz you had to match the rhythm of his belly with your head?

Gosh Dang I used to love that album.

I’ll go back and read your thread now.


ETA: looks like you threw in the rest of the line later in the OP. Fun song .

I agree with your sentiment though. It’s basically why I’m not a member of a church... it feels fake and uninspired. Recently heard a pastor start to get into the Greek for meaning of the Word “Logos” and about 2 minutes in said “you know what you don’t have to worry about what all that means because here ILL TELL YOU”

Couldn’t believe it.
Don’t worry about the real meaning, let me push my watered down Christmas Eve service.

a reply to: SteamyJeans

You still love that bunch, huh!!

I had to post that title, thanks

No church not a problem.....I nyther....won't be long till the wedding feast, you know that huh.!,, my lady

a reply to: GBP/JPY

Good post!

Jesus Freak rocks. Saw them live over 20 years ago at the Atlanta Georgia Superdome. Most of the crowd was there for Michael W. Smith or Newsboys. DC Talk opened with Jesus Freak and closed with I wish We'd All Been Ready. Powerful stuff. Between songs they exposed themselves completely, even telling us about their worst mistakes like infidelity for one member.

A real and raw bunch of talented guys with a good message. I still listen to a few of their songs sometimes. It's crazy but I can say a band I had barely heard of changed my life (and many others) that night and made me a better person for life.

As a Protestant I know Catholics who are more Christian than some Protestants

Free at last was their pinnacle album, don't remember much else

a reply to: Raggedyman

Ten four.....we grew up seeing the devout and dang proud of the parishioners, the machine and leaders that are fallen or deceived we wonder about

I built a new C atholic church in Axle Texas and the priest would only PARK his car halfway in off the street till the site could be blezsed how do ya spell blezsed?

a reply to: GBP/JPY

I think you're missing quite a bit here. Looks like it's personal. Did a priest touch you at some point in your life? Get kicked out from being an alterboy? Jealousy? What....? Something must have triggered you against the church. Mommy make you go to church against your will when you were a child?

Why is this even in this forum? This is more of a rant than anything worth reading through.

Guess you have to be or have been a Catholic to understand the ceremony behind the practice. It's not much different than any other religious practice. It's quite a bit more ceremonial but other than that, it's pretty much the same.

a reply to: StallionDuck

Not biblical though

That bit written on that confessional booth....read the other half of the verse it's from and I grew up baptist....whole Bible
Lose the hate lose the tude that's not you, I'm certain....I can discern spirits

a reply to: StallionDuck

I think the Catholic Churches teachings are significantly different and certainly non Christian in many of their application
Their history is a very clear indication of the leaders corruption throughout history

a reply to: GBP/JPY

Nervous inconsequential ramblings.

a reply to: GBP/JPY

So Texas, probably on central time and still before noon. Are you enjoying the start of your weekend? Have you been celebrating already? Awesome.

But I don't think the bread and wine are turned back into normal material objects after communion is finished. Usually the wine is consumed completely and the left over eucharist is stored in a tabernacle. I remember always needing to genuflect going in front of the tabernacle because it contained the holy.

But if I were a god, I wouldn't let my practitioners off by simply mouthing some words. That seems really really stupid, even if they do say 10 hail marys and 5 lords prayer. Catholic priests weren't prohibited to marry until around the 11th century when the church found out how much inheritance would come back directly to them instead of the priest's families.

And they think this structure actually teaches morals. Amazing.

originally posted by: GBP/JPY
a reply to: StallionDuck

Not biblical though

That bit written on that confessional booth....read the other half of the verse it's from and I grew up baptist....whole Bible
Lose the hate lose the tude that's not you, I'm certain....I can discern spirits

Sure it's biblical. The gospel is read at every sermon. The confessional is simply taken another way but for reason.

Here are a few ways based on the bible:

- Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.

This is right out of the bible. A priest is more than a name. A priest often and should act like a shepherd and tend to his flock, much the same way as the preachers do in their congregation. As a child, the parish priest would have supper with us often as he would with others. He involves himself in his flocks life. One of those tasks is a private way of confessing your sins without worry. You're supposed to trust the priest in that manner and many do. They will confide in him what they would not confide with their best friends.

Kind of like your shrink.

- I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah

You may be thinking of this where the Lord is also a go to for confessing sins.


- If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.”


As with Jesus's saying... If you forgive someone's sins, they are forgiven. They don't have to be against you to forgive them. That above line is truly powerful. Someone's life and soul and possibly hereafter is in YOUR hands.

Id keep going but I think I've made my point.

originally posted by: Raggedyman
a reply to: StallionDuck

I think the Catholic Churches teachings are significantly different and certainly non Christian in many of their application
Their history is a very clear indication of the leaders corruption throughout history

That's like saying that the PoTUS we've had through all of time make who the people are of the US. Don't let a few bad apples blind you from the good that has been done. Yeah, I agree, a lot of bad was done but such was the age of imbeciles. You'd think that today would be better... *sigh* In other words... Don't blame Catholics. Blame mankind in general.

In the way you're referring, all denominations are very different from one another. Pentecostals, Mormons, Catholics, Baptist, Full Gospel, and so on... all are very different in style from one another and also in the structure of their beliefs. You can't single out Catholics because it's just like any other religion in how the are different from every other one. Similar as well. You can't deny this.

a reply to: StallionDuck

Nope, what he said

One has to study to get to what this fallen world has done to Scripture

The Catholics cannot use the King James........that's our spring point and for the mormons....who don't think Jesus is God....like the Jehovah wits.....they have their own book.....from Alexandrian beginnings and that's the bad one Latin vulgate? Just say no

Good one Hebrew masoteric and greek.....you don't need to study greek....it's all,in the KJV already

They try to take Jesus out of the world's day to day readings and thoughts.....and they go to any length like hiding giants at the Smithsonian....since that would friggin confirm hugely Gen 6 ....brb with the truth in avalanche form....I'm primed to teach what this fallen world agenda has become....it's a war.....you knew!?

a reply to: GBP/JPY

There is some slob running a group who has changed he times and the law, the commandments even....

The Catholic have a different 10 commandments....leaving out what.....tell me somebody which one would they want to leave out.....hint they kiss the toe of the statue of evil, but call it a knew name, statue of Peter...

Which commandment would that church NEED to get rid of........and how is it not well known

Idol worshipping

I could fill a library..the guy that translated the Latin vulgate for the caths......said in the front of the book.......they held a ppk to his head and made do it......and that was in the Old Testament days.....almost that old. He said......it's trash

All the new versions are told to copy from that trash, 18 verses are left out about Jesus salvation and the Word Grace is missing 303 times in the Old and 77 times in the new testament....go figure tell me

a reply to: GBP/JPY

The bunch that changed the times and the law are friggin condemned in Scripture......

The apostate Cath church said they have the authority to do so.....and put a letter out saying if it's so wrong then why do all the other groups go along with Sunday worship and say nothing about their 10 commandments being ......evil.

It gets worse, my friends it does not get friggin better.....they are going to be held up in front of all in the end....Scripture says, for spilling the blood of the saints.....it gets worse....

Brb.....

a reply to: GBP/JPY

Plenty of 'bibles' have been altered one way or the other:

NIV
NASB
NKJV
ESV

....and yes, even the KJV

All of which are translations of the Hebrew Masoretic, which is not only an unoriginal text but also a copy of the Leningrad Codex, NOT the original Hebrew text which is no longer around today.

So what was at least copied from the original?

Greek Septuagint - which is nearly 2300 years old

Samaritan Pentateuch - which was also copied from the same original Hebrew text

Use those and you'll find some real truth.


Still, my point is, even though dates and length of times have changed, the story is still pretty much the same.

Yes, the Catholic bible is missing a few books. Just as the KJV, some were omitted because they didn't feel they should be in the bible because they couldn't verify what was real and what was not when a certain monk was putting them together.

If you want to get reaaaaaaly technical about it, according to our current history, (not saying I believe this -- not saying I dont) it's all based on a far longer belief system. As a matter of fact, with the vast majority of old religions and mythologies from the past thousands of years, the similarities are mind boggling. Perhaps all of which came from one ancient religion thousands of years prior. An example of a classic chicken or the egg scenario.

Did the Assyrian mythos exist before the Hebrew? Or did the Hebrew come before the Assyrians? Where did Egypt come in to play? Who did they pull from? Who pulled from them?

It's all one big mush! And if you dig into it, you can drive yourself insane looking for the truth and still find yourself more lost than before. It's a pandora's box of intricate tunnels of a never ending maze, one which we don't have a map for beyond a few feet worth of winding passages.

The road is truely long and hard.


Finally... Catholic mass rely on the gospels, NOT the OT. Apples and Oranges.

a reply to: StallionDuck

I can single out the Catholic Church as they teach that the pope has more authority than the written word and any other man on earth
That's enough to make me reject their teachings altogether

Yes I am aware their are good Catholics and bad Protestants and I have already stated that clearly
Though the Catholic Church is a disgrace to Christianity in the same way many tv evangelists are a disgrace to Protestants

I thought repentance and answers were found at the local catholic church. So... I went there.
Three minutes into my affair with catholicism I was rejected. Banished if you will.
I learned nothing save the negation the church gives to me. then Jesus himself put a very strong spell on me. STRONG spell....
The kind that makes witches seem corny .....
I broke away from it, but it took some effort.

My point: "catholicism and christ" are just about the lowest of the low.

I almost bought them a country to live in!
now, for sure, I am not an aspiring christ like catholic. And I'm ok with that.

I'd rather lean towards the "whatever, man" doctrine of fellowship. Maybe you will or maybe you won't .


Sad thing is ... I absolutely believe the hell fire lake story.

a reply to: StallionDuck

Do you suppose it's true I heard Enoch used to be in the KJV.?

I'm curious bout that!!