The Woeful Tale of Ole Long John Johnson

Back when I was a young man, I thought I could just go around breaking the young ladies hearts. It wasn't until my olé Granny sat me down on her porch and asked me if I was fond of any young women in town that I gave a thought to changin' my ways.

"I'm fond of quite a few.'' I answered in my cockiness of youth and my dear olé Granny sure did have a cautionary tale to tell about breakin hearts like it was some sort-o-game.

"Now, you listen here, don't follow the path of olé Long Johnson, sonny. He wasn't always long in the face, but sometime' you never know just when you might get your own heart broke.'' She sipped from her glass of iced tea with a distant look upon her face and settled into her rocking chair.
"When I was a young thing, around your age, John Johnson dated just about every young woman in town and broke just about all of their hearts too. One day a woman came to town, broke just about as many hearts as olé John... beautiful she was and real sophisticated...all fancy in her looks. No one new from where she came, but olé John was sure she was the one.''

Granny cracked a smile and laughed a tad wicked like, ''Ole John set to courten' the young beauty and she seemed to take to him for awhile, but one day she disappeared as sudden as she came into town. Ole John, must of went by her house everyday for a year and longer only to see some cat he claimed to be smilin', smirkin' at him, he would say, just sittin' on the young woman's porch. He said to folks in town that the cat watched and waited for olé John to show up just to smirk and glare at him. People say that each day his face grew' longer an longer with despair.'' Granny had a strange smile as she resettled into her rocking chair.

"So, what ever became of olé long John Johnson, Gran?'' I asked.

"Oh he still comes around to this day looken' for his lost love.'' Granny had just about lost it with a wicked laugh and went in the house to get some more iced tea, when the saddest looken' man with a long face came along and looked past the front yard fence and onto my Granny's porch. I looked to where he was looken' and to my surprise there sat and old fluffy Calico cat in my Granny's rocker...

...Just smirkin' and smilin''.

The end

My inspiration being the original story teller of Poor olé Long Johnson,

a reply to: peppycat

Very nice peppycat! SF

a reply to: Quantum12 Thanks Quantum! I just hope I did the cat in the video justice to what ever he was telling us!

a reply to: peppycat

Yes you did!!!

a reply to: Quantum12 Thanks, I can't help but go around sounding like that silly cat right now, waving my finger in warning! Soda pop will do crazy things to me!... okay.. I was doing that before the soda too.
I'm really glad you like the story!

Wow! Inspiration comes in the strangest packages sometimes...
All I got from it was Oh,Long Johnson and oh Don Piano. You found a story and a good tale at that

a reply to: the owlbear Thank you Owlbear!
The cat seemed to be telling a somewhat sad story about olé long Johnson to me and I couldn't get it out of my head so I had to write the story or be stuck going around saying oh long Johnson and laughing...I had to come to grips with my silliness today.
Glad you liked it!😊

OH MY GOD THIS WAS SO GOOD! I'm wowed.

a reply to: geezlouise Thank you... I'm wearing a big smile now!😊 Hope your having a good evening... you just made mine all the better!

originally posted by: peppycat
a reply to: the owlbear Thank you Owlbear!
The cat seemed to be telling a somewhat sad story about olé long Johnson to me and I couldn't get it out of my head so I had to write the story or be stuck going around saying oh long Johnson and laughing...I had to come to grips with my silliness today.
Glad you liked it!😊

What about Don Piano and his role in the affairs of Old Long Johnson?
I can imitate that cat so well my gf cracks up every time I do it.
I would have probably never seen it, but South Park had an awesome episode about Internet fads several years ago.

a reply to: the owlbear Lol! I think Don Piano was a rival heart breaker of olé Long Johnson!
It's hard not to want to imitate that cat! I often imitate the no no no no cat when I disagree with my BF... viral talking cat's...there needs to be more!
I'll have to look up that South Park on the internet videos.

a reply to: peppycat deciphered more over LNG john, he worked a whole long day, did he find a nugget?

a reply to: peppycat

Now, ole long Johnson broke Granny's heart so bad she had put herself into her silly cat and the minute he seen that pesky thing he took off his clothing and ran through town with none but his long johns on....wondering..."why didn't i just go for the one i longed for!?"
as Granny tried and tried to get the story straight, "Now i was told theys married and i am not one for adultery as any good male will be struggling to say...
"that ole Granny she be beaten sensless before even holding another guys hand... yeo thats what any good looken fellah be tellen ya...so any other nonsense and i will leave this world through the portal i be settin up to get away fro my ole heart ever bein' broken shattered and thrown to the wayside...where i am from heart breaken is a sin of all sins.."
"where are you from now, Gran..."
"That is what i been wonderin' around tryin' my darndest to say...nobody knows really..i just show up. be looken like i do and either get treated nice or otherwise...and i report this all through some ole crystal...with rainbows in it.."
"granny lay off that drink now, i know whats in your tea.."
Granny just laughed and went back into her song, She is a man of constant sorrow...

when bea no means no yet no means fight yet no never means enter my territory....
what does no mean!
my ex said i should be a .....no no vip backstage pass......no no no means get out!

stupid marvin......
poor marvin
he destryed my poisen ivy poster so i could deal with cops again....