How to erase the embarressment of a failed life?

I f****d up on many levels. Looking back from my present understanding, I am amazed at how stupid I was.
But it's way too late to do anything about it.

I wonder why I was so stupid back then. Were there forces directing my emotional energy, and in particular my sexual energy, in a dysfunctional direction? Maybe.

When will I no longer feel the embarressment of knowing I am nearing the end of a failed life? I know I'm not the only one, but damn!

If there's reincarnation, I guess I get another chance. If there's nothing, then good. Let me disappear.

a reply to: droid56

You move on from this point forward.

Now you have to use what you learned from failing.

There is no need to wait for a new life, its up to you.

YOU must be the change you wish.

Or just roll over, the choice is yours.

edit: ohh not that kind of dysfunction.

a reply to: droid56

Now I've taken some substances that have required forced self reflection, do you know that I was offered peace of mind in that there is not a person out there who can reflect with the utter most integrity, and didn't you know? That, that is ok, you are human after all.

a reply to: droid56

We've all messed up man. Take solace in the fact that you are not the only one. Nothing to be embarrassed about.

a reply to: droid56
Everybody makes mistakes. Smart people admit their mistakes, learn from them, and move on. You don't seem stupid.

I think I have become a better person in recent years, a wiser person, but when I was screwing up in my early years, I wasn't even close to making the right decisions. That just bugs me big time.

Welcome to the Club

originally posted by: droid56
I f****d up on many levels. Looking back from my present understanding, I am amazed at how stupid I was.
But it's way too late to do anything about it.

I wonder why I was so stupid back then. Were there forces directing my emotional energy, and in particular my sexual energy, in a dysfunctional direction? Maybe.

When will I no longer feel the embarressment of knowing I am nearing the end of a failed life? I know I'm not the only one, but damn!

If there's reincarnation, I guess I get another chance. If there's nothing, then good. Let me disappear.

Feel the burn. The acknowledgement of your failing and the associated 'guilt' as it were, shows your true repentance.

You don't have to do anything just let the feelings wash over you, its okay to feel ashamed. After some time it will pass.

Oh and see that you don't repeat those mistakes from now on. Before you didn't maybe know right from wrong, now that you have been given to know, you can't play dumb anymore, know what I mean?

Negative events of the past can make it hard to live in the present. Troubling memories can make it hard to sleep or get through the day. There will come a point at which you must let go of the past or it will define your future. And yet, we always carry our pasts with us in the ways we think, talk, and perceive the world. Managing this can feel like a tightrope walk without an end in sight. By taking things step-by-step and keeping your mind open, you can come to accept your past as part of yourself. You can leave behind the negative habits that have kept you tethered to unfulfilled dreams and broken promises.

www.wikihow.com...


No need to worry about the past, that is, until we invent a time machine.

It`s not easy to forget the past. It lives in my mind. I hope it leaves me but I know it will be with me as long as I am this person living in this body.

a reply to: droid56

Nothing in life is easy, it takes commitment and discipline, most of us just learn to cope.

a reply to: droid56

Your life isn't a failed one. Change. I don't want you to disappear.

Try. Hard. No excuses.

You can redeem a life of apathy or sin in an hour. Do something for others.

Fight and stick it out. I got a suicidal vibe (and you should never consider that) but if you're sick a positive attitude goes a long way! It's never too late to make a change.

I'm on your side, send me a PM if you want to talk (and realize I am bad about checking those messages daily). I'll try though.

Life gets bad, it gets hard, but push through the bad crap and it gets better.

Don't cut your story short. Shoot, start writing! Please talk to someone and you're family and friends, then if you need a sympathetic ear some weirdo on the internet named Domo1.

I believe in you, as dorky as that sounds. You've got this!

"I did the best I could with what I had"


Just think about that for a second.


i also agree with previous posters that its ok to be ashamed.

But your life is not over yet so don't be quick to say that it has failed.

I appreciate where you are standing and think those shoes carry a fine man. Good luck with your future.

I`m not suicidal at this point. But don`t ask too much of me.

First step is admitting you have failed, unless you did some horrible crimes, we all messed up at one point in our lives, our conscience is a good thing, it helps us remember the past wrongs we did, now just don't repeat them.

You are not alone feeling like #.


The past can eat you up inside, you have to open up, find a therapist or a friend you can trust, it feels great to get it off your chest.

Sorry for the terrible grammar.

a reply to: droid56

No one intelligent enough to be self-aware is going to be perfectly happy with their lives. We are all messed up to some extent. You just happen to be cognizant of your flaws and shortcomings which is actually a good thing in my opinion. You can't improve unless you can admit your problems to yourself.

a reply to: droid56

Why should you HAVE to apologize for what YOU perceive as a "failed" life? WHO pays your bills, puts food on your table. clothes on your back, etc etc etc? NO ONE but YOU! Even if it's someone else, SO WHAT?! In this life you get by as best you can and THEN , only THEN can you go on and actually MAKE your life. It ain't easy kiddo, unless, of course, you're born to it. And what, in general, does that say for you? Not that much because you can't/don't do anything for it. It's not a worry though.

It took me FOREVER and a day to figure that one out. Then it took another lifetime to actually OWN that trufh. It's not easy kiddo... not at all. The only thing (ha) you have to do is O W N it. Go from there and, if you REALLY want to...you work on changing. Some people, me, can't seem to do it. All I can do is pass along my experience, and hope like hell someone listens. And i truly hope you do.

IF there is reincarnation...I'm needin' A LOT of work and extra lives. Good luck to you Hon. I'm really root'in for you,!

a reply to: droid56

My dream is to live in a trailer / own my own property and not have to pay much rent and work at a job that I like and to be surrounded by good people and hobbies. I would work on things like music and writing. You could do something like that, I'm sure. Not much more is needed.

a reply to: droid56

What makes you think you had a failed life when you are still living?

Many of us as juveniles made BIG mistakes......maybe much worse than what you did......Menéndez brothers come to mind.

Your life has purpose, you just don't see it .........yet.

Your life is unique and it is about learning.......sounds like you are close to a revelation!

STOP! Slow down, can you hear yourself breathing? If not, STOP, go to a quite place, stop those thousands of thoughts as they run through your head......one thought at a time and make them positive thoughts!

You have friends here........talk to us......Hundreds of heads are better than one. Maybe one of us has a solution.

Why do you say you lived a failed life?

a reply to: droid56 Thats part of life and learning. You realize how foolish you were so congradulations, you passed the class! Now time to move forward to new things to experience. Just dont repeat the same old mistakes. The past is gone and cant be changed, look to your better future.