posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 04:06 PM
Hello ATS...Over the years I have found advice from ATS to be helpful... and boy oh boy...do I need help now.
Quick breakdown for context:
Both of us are in our early 30s. We dated for one year and have now been married for two. During the first 2 and a half years, everything was
completely fine. We have no kids. Upper-middle class. I work 9-10 hours per day at an office and she stays home all day going to school and working
Fast forward to Jan. 2016 everything changed literally overnight.
Wife started drinking and I mean DRINKING.
I feel this is a little different than a "typical" alcoholic. She drinks herself to the point of complete blackout. I honestly think she would drink
herself to death but the alcohol puts her out before she dies. Since Jan. she has been to the hospital 6 times.One time, for 5 days. Her BAC at the
hospital has been as high as .67
For the last three months, her day is (no joke) wake up, walk to liquor store, buy alcohol, down as much as possible as fast as possible, spend the
next 20 hours in bed, and repeat.
As you can imagine, our relationship has been completely derailed. I have done the typical "newbie" caring loved one behavior. Yell at her. Beg her
to stop. Try to cut off her access to alcohol. Tear the house apart looking for bottles. Pouring out bottles. I can't even describe the mental
Now, I just found out back in Feb. that she has actually gone through this exact situation before.
It perplexes me to no end because for over two years we drank like normal people do. Her reaction to alcohol was like anyone else. Typical hangovers.
Typical behavior when she would get "buzzed"...but this is something different altogether.
Everyday I have to prepare myself that I may come home to a corpse...its exhausting.
I have been obviously doing as much research as possible and thinking about joining an Al-Anon support group. From what I can read is, you essentially
let the alcoholic be an alcoholic. Don't cover for them. Don't help them. Basically, the silent treatment.
Does ANYONE have any experience with this? Is the "silent treatment" method really how I should deal with this? How concerned should I be for her
safety? Whats the chance she will recover? We are already at the point where she basically HAS to drink because the withdrawal could kill her. She has
to accept treatment (can't be forced).
God, I want to help her and go on to help other struggling with the same thing. I never knew how bad alcoholism was and I never thought I would be
involved with something like this.
Any advice would be helpful.