a reply to: Belcastro
To the OP. Just do not lie to girls about what you are into. And be truthful to yourself about what you want. Be upfront with your flaws. Do not hide
yourself. Do not hide behind a persona. Do not think you can change anyone. It almost never works. If you do not want someone as they are now. You
probably do not want them. If you want someone to accept you. Be prepared to accept them.
Also, a little caution. You said you want a goddess you can worship. A lot of guys says this. But are not prepared for what it means. It means you are
immediately putting her on a pedestal. That you are putting her above you in the relationship. That the relationship will not be equal at all. If the
relationship is not equal, it is easy for her to think of you as less than her. When in that mindstate it is easy for her to use you. Which might be
okay. If that is what your soul wants.
Its just. that is not what most guys are actually looking for when they say they want a woman to worship.
Most guys when they say they want a goddess to worship, actually mean, they want a girl that is like an unboxed toy to a collector. Something they can
stare at and keep to themselves. Forever pristine and unchanged. Then when she inevitably does change and act like a real person with real feelings
and flaws. The illusion dissipates.
So basically reality and fantasy are not always the same thing. Just be aware of this and truthful with yourself. Do not force a role on a woman that
she does not want. It will lead to disaster. If you do seek a specific role for your mate, be upfront and find a woman who will accept that role.
Never lie to yourself or her. It is not magic. It makes relationships go much better. Then, even if they end for whatever reason. It could still be a
happy ending. There will not be any hate. Just two people moving on from each other. You lose a lover but gain a true friend who knows you inside and
out. Usually relationships that end bitterly, end that way because one or both parties are lying about something. So its the hurt and anger over the
lies that causes the bitterness and hate.
Also, be willing to wait to find someone who is willing to extend to you, the same courtesy you extend to them. There is no point in not lying about
yourself if you are willing to accept a woman that is lying to you.
If for whatever reason you want to sleep with more than one person. Do not lie. Do not cheat. If you do, then do not be surprised when you destroy
the relationship. So if you must sleep around but still want someone to love. Find a mate that will let you. If multiple partners is your thing find
someone whose thing it also is. Or if those desires come years after you have been together. Then tell your mate how you are feeling. You may be
surprised by her reaction. Just be prepared that she may want to do the same as you or she may want to end the relationship. And do not walk into such
a relationship unless you have your ego in check.
I think these are things all young men should be told. Too many men get themselves into relationship situations that they do not really want. Then
they end up unhappy. Which makes their mate unhappy. Then both parties are suffering soul crushing unhappiness. Because both decided to lie to each
other and not be themselves. All because they seek some imaginary societal acceptance.
edit on 21-9-2015 by karmicecstasy because: (no reason