Hello again ATS!
There are times to really sit and think things through, and then there are times to just say to Hell with it
and rant ones posterior off. Right
now I feel it to be the latter!
I have a serious thread about the current DDoS attacks, and posts in several others that provide all of the links to support what I am about to fume
about. I may come along, later, when I'm not laughing maniacally, to add them in - but then again I may not. I am forgetful and have the attention
span of a squirrel on NoDoze anyway.
You see... It's all technology. Our world. It all runs on two basic concepts, information and electricity. That loaf of bread you bought only got to
the place where you purchased it because of power and logistic support - information and electricity. Hell, even if you're snobby and make your own
bread at home - don't bother trying to diss me... You still got the ingredients the same way. Plus everyone paid - which requires at least
electricity for cash transactions and information and electricity for credit or debit sales.
And who carries cash these days???
Take away those two simple things ( actually just one since information relies upon electricity ) and we're all stuck suddenly wearing spotted togas,
sitting in a stone wheeled car trying to run fast enough to make it go!
Yabba dabba freaking doo! Yay for us!
The problem is infrastructure. it's all mechanized, computerized, sanitized, elecrified and automated ( the last two don't rhyme - cope ). We took
our entire modern world and slapped it together with some CAT5 cable and duct tape and called it a miracle. And it worked, kind of, for a long time.
Then along came Seth Rogan and James Franco. Yup.
You see the world was normal. Bombs were dropping. Diseases were spreading. Prices were rising. The population was gaming, blogging, and pirating
stuff... you know all the good crap we get to do when the kids are gone and work is done. We didn't really care much about race riots nor cities in
the middle east being smart bombed into rubble. We said we did - but that's mostly because we know we're supposed to say we care. Well, except for
the select few who say they don't care just to get a rise out of others.
It wasn't a perfect life, but it was a life.
Then these two stoners decided to make a movie about North Korea and Kim Jung Un. Fair enough! First Amendment, parody. God bless America and all that
stuff. They were doing what stoners do... They were sitting around trying to make each other laugh and an idea for a movie was born. Being that these
are two famous stoners? That idea actually got greenlighted as a movie.
THAT is when things began to go so horribly, horribly wrong.
You see, then some asshat, somewhere, decided to hack Sony, the studio that decided to let the stoners make their flick. Again, fine and awesome.
Hacking evil Corporations! All about it. Except this time, along with usual ugly gossip that such hacks tend to leak - the plot to this new movie also
It's about two guys going to North Korea and offing Kim Jung Un.
Li'l Kim apparently has taken great offense to the idea of being killed - even if it 's not real. Actually can you blame him? They make him wear
that suit and that haircut - that's GOTTA cause a lot of unvented rage. But anyway... Li'l Kim is pissed.
See! That's his "Im really pissed" face. This is no laughing matter
In a sane world it would all end there. Maybe a bit of rhetoric back and forth - or the movie would get pulled - Or a certain short, chybby, rather
grumpy Dear Leader would pick up a phone and call his homeboy Dennis Rodman to come by and hug it out...
But... NNNNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! We don't live in that world. We live in THIS world. And in THIS world two stoners and a tiny Asian have brought us to
the brink of the apocalypse!
Everyone is DDoSing everyone else. Private companies are hiring private botnets to DDoS anyone who they even think might have a copy of a leaked memo
or movie from the above mentioned hack of Sony. The entire world has gone freaking insane - OVER A MOVIE.
I don't know about the rest of you, but I for one plan to spend my night outside, in the yard, screaming at the sky - begging the mothership to come
get my ass off of this rock. I'm done!
I swear to God if I'd have written this as a fictional story two or three years ago, I'd have gotten laughed at and sent to the special room where
they use the magic head electrodes to make you visit happyland for a few hours.
The ONLY bright side that I can see is that, if this all does go totally south, future archeologists and paleontologists will NEVER be able to figure
this crap out! So HA to them.
Now I'm off to enjoy my electricity until the Stonerocalypse steals it away....