I lost my father

We had funerals today. I have lost my father who i loved very much, he was my guide all these years. My father had covid he was compromised because his asthma, he had all 3 vaccinations and got covid from someone, my brother tested negative. My father was in wheelchair due his back pain last ten years and only person (we know) he was visited last month was my brother ( i live 200 km away ).. so where did this covid came from , we don´t know.

My father was a survivalist. He tought me and my brother how to survive in cold climate if there were no shelter. He tought us how to get food from nature. My father was a military man so i am a military brat. We lost our mother when my little brother was 1 year old. Father was single parent all these years. My father was a fisherman , a hunter a guide. Not only he taught us he also taught our neighbours kids same lessons as we did. We had his funerals today and i am very touched by the support and love we experienced by all the people who joined in his memorial today. I would have never guessed he touched so many people.

My father was unique, i have always knewn. My aunt said " he is the best father you could ever get" and she was right. I am so sad he left us.. so sad he had to go. I saw my father in his death bed, i was wearing all the covid protection gear but still he recognised me. He said to me "Mia i want Euthanasia", i had to say that it is not an option in our country. He was very tired but managed to say how he want his funerals to be taken care of. He knew his time had come. I was hoping he would still get his spirit up and get over it.. but i was wrong. I always thought my father as a atheist but he wanted a plessing and pretty much normal funerals except he wanted cremation.

His funerals were beautiful and serene, my father had touched so many people that i had no idea of. He helped so many and so many loved him and joined us in farewell to his last journey.

I miss you Father and i always will love you...

a reply to: dollukka

No words will really help but it sounds like you had a beautiful ceremony to honor the man that helped raise and guide you & your brother (among others) in his life.

His legacy lives on through you and whatever you believe in you can always treasure the memories and lessons you learned from him

Condolences and sending positive energy to you and your fam from my neck of the woods

I’m so sorry to read this.
Please accept my heartfelt condolences.
Bless you and your family.
And most of all, bless your father.

a reply to: dollukka

Sending my condolences

When the pain of losing him has passed, you will find the joy of love in the memories you hold dear

Take care

Peace

Thank you all. I am stil processing this day. It has been so much crying , missing him and heart ache. I will always cherish memory of my father. I am so happy i had the privilegde to be his daughter !

a reply to: dollukka

I know how you are feeling...my father passed not too long ago as well. The biggest thing which helped me was how he told me he didn't want a sad funeral or for people to be sad he had passed. He was very adamant about that. He wanted us to tell stories and drink and have a party for him. It really helped in the fact that as I am sure you feel now...you want to live up to their last expectations. After that I carried the same attitude for my grandmother and shortly after my grandfathers passing last year.

We can't stop death as it is part of life...but we can celebrate life...and it sounds like there is a lot to celebrate about his life!

a reply to: dollukka

You father sounds like an amazing man.
Please accept my condolences.

Tears of the heart can not be seen, but can be felt. (MIM)
l m happy you have a smile in your heart for your father.

a reply to: dollukka

Sounds like your dad had it rough in the end. I may sound a little harsh, but his suffering is now over.

My Dad died at fifty years old, he had been in WW11 and got both shot and blown up. He had shrapnal in his arm and in his back near his spine which they did not remove. He was a very hard worker, he loved to hunt and fish. He had problems with the shrapnal in his arm, the scar from the bullet hole in his leg was not too troublesome, it just looked bad. The little piece in his back did not give him a problem.

When he was forty nine, he passed out and had to go to the hospital....we dragged him into the car when we were out metal detecting at an old farm. He had brain cancer, he got a chunk of his brain removed and was paralized and could not talk right anymore. I felt bad for him, he loved fishing and hunting in the woods and he was pretty much an invalid after that. I was relieved that his suffering ended...mostly mental suffering on his part. I could see it in his eyes...he felt like he was a burden to everyone.....that is how I will feel if I wind up in bad shape. I would rather kick the bucket than become a burden on my family.

Sounds like your dad was a real nice guy but it was time to go. He will always live in your mind and it sounds like he was a positive influence on you. I hope my kids and grandkids remember me positively, hopefully I do not turn into a crabby dick before I die. When a person gets old and goes on meds, sometimes they change for the worse...I will not take long term meds because of my severe intolerance to some in the past...I can't seem to metabolize them properly.

I am not so sure that we completely die when we die, look for strange things happening in the house, many people notice some strange things with electronic stuff for a couple of weeks after someone dies. I suppose that only happens if they die in the house though, which is how I have experienced this stuff a couple of times myself.

a reply to: dollukka

I fear of this moment of my life
I do not know how to handle it
I think it is okay to feel lost and confused
Thoughts of the pasts thoughts of what I should have said and should have done
I cannot prepare for the pain I will feel
I hope somehow you will find peace with it all, and find happiness
Live life, be grateful, this is your moment.
I will feel your pain in time, we all do.
Much love

You have not lost your father. You will see him again.

God bless you.

a reply to: dollukka

a reply to: dollukka

I believe your father is probably in a far better place and seeing his family, he will probably check in on you from time to time as well God willing, may the Lord bless you and your family and help you though this and may his angels watch over you.

a reply to: rickymouse

My father was a war child, he was sent to Denmark Roskilde during WW2, my father`s parents were deaf so they thought deaf parents are not able to take care of the child during war. My father was located to childless couple who owned a factory in rotskilde in Denmark. So my father was years in denmark and there were a battle between my grandparents and this danish couple before my father was finally back to his parents. Both sides battled over him. i can understand the danish couple as my father were a newborn when he was sent to them, and my father was sent back to his home country when my father was 4 years old. My father had to learn his native language again.
My grandparents were both deaf but they had help, so eventually my father learnt native language and had siblings too. Even my grandparents were deaf they were socially and politically active. My father´s mother were active with rights of deaf people and was honored by President of our country. My greatgrandmother was a member Scandinavian congress of deaf and met Helen Keller. My father and his siblings were all hearing.,

My father´s history is not usual one and he was not usual one. I respect my roots and the battle my grandparents did and it was the right one. My father and my family has different kind of history.. it has been about battle, survival and success and what your goals have been,
I am proud of my father, proud of my grandparents and proud of my roots. I love my father and my grandparents for all they did.

I am so sorry to hear about your loss... the whole covid thing feels very mysterious and kind of sudden. I had covid too and I honestly felt suicidal when I had it because of the fatigue mainly, like I strongly felt like I should just give up the ghost... which is very mysterious to me.

I'm glad you had a father like him too, for now you can share who he was with us and that is very up-lifting. Thank you for sharing.

Condolences to you all 😔x

a reply to: dollukka

My heart goes out to you, and my prayers go up for both you and your father. I've lost both my parents, and it leaves a big gaping hole like no other. But it gets easier -- I promise. You will never stop missing him, but gradually you will find that your memories become joyful blessings rather than painful reminders.

"How lucky you are
How fortunate you've been
That he was your father
And also your friend"

Let yourself cry. Let yourself be angry. Let yourself grieve. It's all part of the mourning process that cleanses your heart and spirit, leaving only the happiness you shared behind. Then you can cherish your memories for the treasures they are.

Big hugs.

a reply to: dollukka

I am so sorry for your pain, Dollukka. From what I've read of your posts, you have much of your fathers' warrior spirit. May his memory, and all he was that now resides within you bring you comfort.

originally posted by: dollukka
a reply to: rickymouse

My father was a war child, he was sent to Denmark Roskilde during WW2, my father`s parents were deaf so they thought deaf parents are not able to take care of the child during war. My father was located to childless couple who owned a factory in rotskilde in Denmark. So my father was years in denmark and there were a battle between my grandparents and this danish couple before my father was finally back to his parents. Both sides battled over him. i can understand the danish couple as my father were a newborn when he was sent to them, and my father was sent back to his home country when my father was 4 years old. My father had to learn his native language again.
My grandparents were both deaf but they had help, so eventually my father learnt native language and had siblings too. Even my grandparents were deaf they were socially and politically active. My father´s mother were active with rights of deaf people and was honored by President of our country. My greatgrandmother was a member Scandinavian congress of deaf and met Helen Keller. My father and his siblings were all hearing.,

My father´s history is not usual one and he was not usual one. I respect my roots and the battle my grandparents did and it was the right one. My father and my family has different kind of history.. it has been about battle, survival and success and what your goals have been,
I am proud of my father, proud of my grandparents and proud of my roots. I love my father and my grandparents for all they did.

I am from Denmark to, from a town called Viborg, I am sure you dad loved you and want you to enjoy your life, do not feel sad, just enjoy your life.. I am sure you will meet him again. Much love

a reply to: dollukka

I'm sorry for your loss, but it sounds like he was an awesome person, and you got to see some of the lives he touched, where you might not have ever known.

a reply to: dollukka


Sounds like you were privileged to have a strong moral man raise you and your siblings.

My sincere condolences to you and your family.