A Joke For Brits Only

Homie is just mad cuz his local Glasgow pub ran out of Special Brew....and crack.

Is this you bro? Sorry bout yur toe, but get a damned job...

a reply to: TritonTaranis

Anyway, tell me more about WWII

What's to tell?

The USA won the war single-handedly.
We know this because the American national curriculum teaches this in accordance with The History of the World according to Hollywood. (What more of a reliable source is there?)

a reply to: Freeborn

Tell that to all the white crosses in Maddingly and a thousand other places.


Europe's inability to sort their own arrogant #e out got us and the rest of the world involved. The US was happily neutral as you well know.


Damned if we do damned if we dont, but bottom line, you best thank you lucky stars and stripes we are on your side.....

a reply to: lakenheath24

A bit sensitive tonight aren't we?
And there was me thinking you knew us better than the average American.

Start a thread specifically about the US's role in WWII and I'll gladly contribute.

I'll just leave you with this:

The US was happily neutral as you well know.

Yes, the US was quite happy being neutral....and profiteering from arming and supplying both sides.
That was until The Axis powers took that option away and decided to declare war on the US.

I've never denied the massive contribution the US played in WWII and the sacrifice so many made and the respect and honour I have for those who served so valiantly.
But far, far too many Americans seem to believe this Hollywood fed drivel that the US was some sort of justice seeking Knight in Shining Armour that single-handedly won the war all on their own.

Its vomit inducing bollocks.

I honestly thought you had much more about you.

a reply to: Freeborn


When it come to some turd OP talking total bollocks then yeah.....especially this subject.

a reply to: mamabeth
Traditional British humour has jokes about mothers-in-law and lavatories, and would be full of innuendo and double-entendre.
If you really wanted to know more, you could try watching one of the "Carry On" film franchise- Carry on Cleo includes what is universally recognised as the worst pun in cinematic history ("Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!")

originally posted by: Freeborn
a reply to: lakenheath24

A bit sensitive tonight aren't we?
And there was me thinking you knew us better than the average American.

Start a thread specifically about the US's role in WWII and I'll gladly contribute.

I'll just leave you with this:

The US was happily neutral as you well know.

Yes, the US was quite happy being neutral....and profiteering from arming and supplying both sides.
That was until The Axis powers took that option away and decided to declare war on the US.

I've never denied the massive contribution the US played in WWII and the sacrifice so many made and the respect and honour I have for those who served so valiantly.
But far, far too many Americans seem to believe this Hollywood fed drivel that the US was some sort of justice seeking Knight in Shining Armour that single-handedly won the war all on their own.

Its vomit inducing bollocks.

I honestly thought you had much more about you.

And people say it's the Germans that have no sense of humour.

a reply to: lakenheath24

The guy was fishing for a reaction mate, that seems to be his MO.

a reply to: Freeborn


This thread is about British jokes,not WW2.
Trust me,I would love to tell you what I think
about WW2,but not here. I am trying to behave
myself more here on ATS.

a reply to: mamabeth

British humour?

It takes many guises.

None more so than self-deprecation and taking the piss out of ourselves, each other in at times very bitingly and sarcastic manner.
We see humour in almost every situation.
Taking the piss is our national pastime.

If someone really wanted to learn a bit more about British humour this thread would not be a great place to start.

a reply to: Granitebones

Hmmm, humor he says. 4 flags and two stars says methinks the OP is no Jimmy Carr...more like Jimmy Saville.

a reply to: Freeborn


It worked. Dont know this OP, so will log for the future.

A British told me a joke once.

What do you call a Russian with one testicle?










Whodyaknickabollockov.



Lolz

It's most likely only members of the Brit Armed Forces community are aware that the proud and the few (hundred thousand) got properly stuffed by a half a dozen booties. If you're ever out and about in Blighty try the Jimmy Saville quip out. You'll get first hand experience of free emergency healthcare.
a reply to: lakenheath24

a reply to: Granitebones


Try your smack talking round Lakenheath and you will find the same outcome as you describe.

By a bunch of US Airy Fairies?🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Dream on sweetie.
a reply to: lakenheath24

a reply to: Granitebones


We aint worried. Everyone knows Northerners are too poor to afford public transport, much less a car.

Northerner? How dare you Sir? I am a born and bred Devonian that lives in the wilds of darkest Dartmoor and drives a utility vehicle. No northern Nancy's in my neighbourhood.
a reply to: lakenheath24

a reply to: Granitebones

I am a born and bred Devonian that lives in the wilds of darkest Dartmoor and drives a utility vehicle.

Which in reality means an inbred sheep shagging woolyback who still believes in sacrificing the first born and manly activities like dancing around maypoles wearing bells and other assorted paraphernalia.

If only CCG was still around to discuss which side of the Tamar is best.

Regards, a true Northerner.

You've been misinformed. I'm Lord of the Manor of Widdecombe and I deflower the first born daughters at their coming of age, then my peasants have their turn and then they get sacrificed. I allow the male children to live and lose their virginity in the sheep pens. True northerner means an excuse for a man that breaks down and cries while walking up a gentle slope to a tor around here lofty.
a reply to: Freeborn