Teaching Toddlers to Torture at Toy Town!

I've been working on new music lately. Originally, as a homage in spirit to Cirqus Voltaire, a new piece was to be called "Boom Balloon".

The first million or so results in a search yielded pages and pages of this..




This is now on my list of most disturbing sh!t I've ever seen. What about you? I mean think of the implications here. Not that Monopoly was a whole lot better from a standpoint of f-ing people over in real estate. This is balloon torture at best... and sadistic programming at worst. The audacity to think that a cartoon balloon would enjoy being poked from all angles until he popped.

I mean WHAT THE F@!$ PEOPLE?! We gonna slowly lower a smiley faced shoe into a freshly opened barrel of dip next?




Not a single result for pages and pages of what I was looking for.

I guess my point is... Boom Balloon was to be the name of a song... it had a big majestic sound... and the only thing that came up in a search was a modernized torture device for kids.

I'm being dramatic, I know... but I was just hoping if some little dude got ahold of the phrase "Boom Balloon" his search would yield slightly more enlightening results.

Monkey with a typewriter theory guys... work with me...

When a kid stares at the ceiling with wonder and awe in his imagination and eventually searches "Boom Balloon" what would you rather him see? The above horror show? Or below?

a reply to: MarkOfTheV

Gotta say, I like this thread. Rape simulators for toddlers... I can see why you're disturbed.

So can we make this an official plug and just link your song already?

originally posted by: Abysha
a reply to: MarkOfTheV

So can we make this an official plug and just link your song already?

No. This is not an advertisement.

"Rape simulator"...

From a toy, over torture to rape all happened in just 20cm of my screen. Seriously one can see a connection to torture here but rape?

Come on, don´t be so over triggerly.

originally posted by: MarkOfTheV

originally posted by: Abysha
a reply to: MarkOfTheV

So can we make this an official plug and just link your song already?

No. This is not an advertisement.

Aww... I was trying to be your "in" for a plug.

originally posted by: verschickter
"Rape simulator"...

From a toy, over torture to rape all happened in just 20cm of my screen. Seriously one can see a connection to torture here but rape?

Come on, don´t be so over triggerly.

To be fair, I also consider Monopoly to be a rape simulator.

What´s Ludo then? A people surpressing simulator?

a reply to: MarkOfTheV

I think it is part of growing up tbh. My poor action man I tortured him so much. I then poured salt on a slug and felt so guilty my brother and I learnt a lesson that day.
Still haunts me that slug.

Just print the words 'Trump Supporter ' on the balloon and it will be 'acceptable extermination'.....
If we are honestly going to call this game where a balloon is popped a 'rape simulator'.

I watched cartoons as a child. I understood that actually dropping an anvil on a person's head could kill them.... and that a cartoon was not real life.

But but but we need to protect our (and the children of others) from such bad influences. I still remember the back and forth between the teacher because my son was allowed to watch "Teenage Mutant HERO Turtles".

Yes, your eyes are working. HERO TURTLES. Because whimsy people thought the word "NINJA" is too offensive. Then they banned the "fork" because it´s "too violent". But the sword, stick and nunjacks were fine.

I´m not joking, it´s a thing.

It's a balloon, not a human being. If a child is somehow motivated to torture another child because they enjoyed playing a game with a balloon, then the parents of that child have much bigger problems to worry about than the game itself. If a child does so, it's because something was wrong with the child long before they ever saw the game in the first place.

a reply to: butcherguy

I watched cartoons as a child. I understood that actually dropping an anvil on a person's head could kill them.... and that a cartoon was not real life.

Everyone is desensitized to death from early on. That was exactly what those cartoons were designed to impart: Fake death. Growing up, we graduate to TV crime show death, army movie death, action , horror, video game deaths.

By the time we are young teens we have seen thousands of 'fake' deaths. That way we don't care our gubment is off killing people around the world, seen it all before, meh, who cares?

a reply to: MarkOfTheV

I hear you.

An albeit, stylized, depiction of slow torture is somehow deemed suitable as a form of entertainment for children.

I wonder how quickly a "toy" stylizing a different sort of "penetration" would be removed from the shelves to a collective sigh of parental relief?

It's only fun when someone (or something substituting for someone) gets "hurt".

originally posted by: Abysha
To be fair, I also consider Monopoly to be a rape simulator.

You probably suck at it and keep buying the utilities.

a reply to: verschickter

Yeah it totally derailed the post... I tried to ignore it but others took the bait..




Then someone chimed in about Trump.




This place isn't near as much fun anymore...

WTF, it's just a game. I'd hate to hear your opinion on Backgammon or Canasta (both involve strategic F-ing of opponents into corners they can't leave, so rape games?)

Actually, no. If you can get this triggered over a game, it makes me wonder what kind of sinful activity you think something like sculpting with clay is. I can just hear it, "That poor lump didn't do anything to you & you're stretching & hollowing out it's guts, massacring it's form, BAKING IT!" Is it some kind of subliminal mass extermination sociopathic training?

Clearly no fans of the game Operation?

a reply to: Nyiah

I work in clay. I don't imagine it's human when I distort it into shape.

If you want to pop a balloon in a torture device go right ahead. But don't anthropomorphize him and make it look like he's having a good time.

Didn't realize I had to spell that point out to everyone...

Anthropomorphism


a reply to: JinMI

He looked terrified... for good reason... he's about to be operated on by unsupervised children. He's in for a long night.

I used to pour petrol on my plastic soldiers then light em up to simulate napalm,...just like I saw on tv.... I was a Vietnam era child kids doing sick stuff with toys goes back a long way

originally posted by: MarkOfTheV
a reply to: Nyiah

I work in clay. I don't imagine it's human when I distort it into shape.

If you want to pop a balloon in a torture device go right ahead. But don't anthropomorphize him and make it look like he's having a good time.

Well good boy, you figured out not seeing inanimate objects as people. Gold star for you!

I think kids get the idea inanimate balloons aren't people.