I had to stand up to my boss today (REAL TALK)

I stood him up, and then took him to the mat.

That's 'sales' talk for: I called his bluff.

Yesterday he asked me why I went to the bathroom so much.
This is a prime example of what I can "false authority."

Today I told him,"Look man, what my body does in the bathroom
is my private business. What I do with my wife in my our private
bedroom is my private business."

He got all shifty and started to squawk about he didn't care about
my "irritable bowl syndrome" and on and on.... I let him vent for
a minute, then I added.

"I'm just letting you know, man."

"Or you're just letting me know? I'll let you know what this is.
I'm here to let you know what up."

"Okay, I get that. But I'm just saying." And I shrugged my shoulders.

My body language is relaxed and non-hostile, but as Pansy paces
the floor, I slowly square off toe to toe and stand up tall.

"I'm just explaining the policy." Skin-head is now looking up at me.

"Okay. Understand your company policy, but not I need to listen
to me as I explain my policy."

This set him off. The guy a ex-cop with anger issues, who
has a chip on his pansy shoulder. So I had to spell it out
for him using my best guerrilla math.

"My policy is very simple, so simple a child could understand it.
What you do in the your bedroom is your business. What you
do in the bathroom is your business. So handle your business
and let everyone else handle their business."

My Socrates approach fails.

Pantie-waist is blabbing at the mouth again.

"Listen to what I'm saying, if I want to # a midget in the ass
that is my business. Do you get that? I can # who ever I want
and this is my business. Same goes for my bowl movement."

My tone is even, like talking to a child.

"What you say it is your policy it sounds like we have a problem."

huh? What is fool blathering about?

"Well, you tell me, do we have a problem" I say, staring him down.

He looks deeply into my eyes to see if I would back down.

He was getting his hackles up, but like a wolf that is about
to strike at his prey, he paces back and forth. Looking for
the right moment to lung for my neck. But as he paced the
floor he careful and woefully considered the harm that my
massive rack of horns could cause him.

"Do we have a problem?" I asked a second time.

"No, we don't have a problem."

"Good. Let's keep it that way."

I wanted to say, "And I don't want to have have this conversion
with you again." but then I held my tongue because I new I won
the argument and was best to allow that dog to lay down and
lick his wounds than kick him again.

Discretion is the better part of valor.
Caution is preferable to rash bravery

But it felt good to express my anger honestly and directly
and without hurting myself... while creating a better work
environment for everyone. Now if this guy continues of mess
with me, I will just outshine him and take his job. He had
best just keep away from me.

I feel empowered.
I feel like a man.
I feel good.

It feels like a new kind of Anger.
One that I can control from Higher Self.
One that is full of righteous indignation.

"So, lets get back on the phones and make money."

I say what he needed to say, and leading the way
I walk back to desk and sit down. He follows.

A few moment latter his messing with me again.
Okay, I feel the rage rising up inside me, then
I remind myself I just won the fight, and it was
now time to play nice. So I played the game
and let me tell me what my job. I could give
him that, he needed to save face. But I knew
and he knew, in a grudge match I would take
him to the floor every time.

By the end of the day, we are kewl with each other.
This is how men handle their problems.

What is the take away?

For me, it was most eloquently said by Zack de la Rocha

"Your Anger is your Gift."

If you are not free to express anger, you are not free.
Anyone who tells you otherwise is your enemy.

Seek not liberty from anger, rather seek only moral anger.
Seek to be righteous in spirit above all else, then allow the
indignation to pour out of you like a flowing river.

Doing the right thing, is often the most courageous choice.
When we act out of courage, we act from Source, and
from the True Authority.

People who have a problem with you telling the truth
are the people who are living a lie.

In ACTIONS, Be Courageous.
In INTENTIONS, Be Righteous
In Communication, Be Real.

HAHA nice

I personally go out of my way to reiterate to my supervisor that I am not his slave. His behavior is predictable and he starts slipping into an ownership mindset every few days. Took a few days off last time just to remind him how very much he needs me and how replacing me will be too hard to be an option. The last time he claimed to have authority over whether I had a job or not I asked him if he wanted to go talk to the owner with me about that and he backed off quick.

Sometimes I feel bad about it but it always feels good at the same time.

Why would you even bring your sex life in to it?

but like a wolf that is about
to strike at his prey, he paces back and forth. Looking for
the right moment to lung for my neck. But as he paced the
floor he careful and woefully considered the harm that my
massive rack of horns could cause him.

What?

originally posted by: wasaka
Now if this guy continues of mess
with me, I will just outshine him and take his job.

Frankly, it sounds like neither one of your are capable of managing others.

I have a rule for work. Don't bring the shop home with you. Don't bring the home to the shop.

I say good for you. The boss doesn't need to know why you have to take a piss. That's, like you said, top secret info.

Uhhh I have been there before in jobs where every single action and second is scrutinised under a effing microscope and im having to explain why I stepped out for a minute or gone to the toilet like im a 12 year old in school.

Luckily I found this nice gig in a warehouse, the manager is great and speaks to me like im a human being and not a robot, as long at all orders are met on time, paper work is completed and the place is kept tidy the boss does not care if I have to step out, take an extra break, make a phone call or go to the toilet.

Usually I say ***k you, I'm dragging up, find someone else qualified to weld your ***t together and fabricate all the bs parts your too cheap to buy. Usually as I turn the welder off and start reeling in my leads that's when the I'm sorry approach sets in and they beg for me not to go.

originally posted by: DAVID64
Why would you even bring your sex life in to it?

Two reasons.

1) I'm talking to a red-neck numb skull.

I have to speak in the 'Guerrilla Math' he understands, and that
means using comparisons, using examples, illustrations, and
in some cases graphic language.

2) I'm married to a transgender woman who I will fight to protect
and it best to put the whole office on notice right now (day 8 on the job)
that I'm here to make money and not to be messed with:

"My business in not ANY your business."

but like a wolf that is about
to strike at his prey, he paces back and forth. Looking for
the right moment to lung for my neck. But as he paced the
floor he careful and woefully considered the harm that my
massive rack of horns could cause him.

What?


That is literally true, he was pace the floor like a caged animal.
It reminded me of a lone wolf want to attack. I stood up to him
the way a bull moose would have, ready to toss his up in the air
like a rag doll with my antlers...

(metaphorically speaking of course).

a reply to: wasaka the best revenge would be to outshine him and take his position

Yes there are crappy bosses out there, that is for sure.
Company's have rules and guidelines for a reason.. some folks abuse them.
Legit reasons, explain with tact and respect ... it goes along way.
Never, ever, never, think you are irreplaceable... ever! You may end up on the street.
A big head will get deflated every time..

We all need to man up now and then and not be run over by some power hungry slob.. agreed.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: wasaka
Now if this guy continues of mess
with me, I will just outshine him and take his job.

Frankly, it sounds like neither one of your are capable of managing others.

Thanks for being Frank.

Here is the simple truth of the matter:

We are both sales guys, all we are capable of doing is
drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes as we ask
for money people don't have for a product that
they don't need.

Managing people requires a whole different skill set
and I'm saying I have what it takes, what I am saying
is this guy does not. And while it is not my ambition
to "manage" other people, it is also true that there
is no one else I trust more than myself to do that
job and to do it right.

originally posted by: wasaka
Managing people requires a whole different skill set
and I'm saying I have what it takes, what I am saying
is this guy does not.

Coming from someone who is in senior management my professional assessment is you are both unqualified to manage others.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus
LOL senior management in most places I work at most of them guys or woman dont really know the business that they are managing really well in my line of work. Usually the only people that make any sense in my area of expertise are the foreman and the guys that use the equipment etc or the systems I am there to build, replace, or fabricate. Please dont take me the wrong way here though I've been around people that management was so rad I wanted to stay because working with them was an absolute dream, your probably one of them type (at least I hope so) my point to this reply to you is only to really say, some management is complete and utter bs and they make the job not only a nightmare but also makes their employees feel like total garbage. I see that an awful lot.

originally posted by: woodwardjnr
a reply to: wasaka the best revenge would be to outshine him and take his position

Actually, I don't want revenge at all.

But this event has shown me a few things.
1) I have the stones to be one of owner's junkyard dogs.
2) I can express anger without hurting myself (or losing my job)
3) I am turning a corner where I demand more of myself.
4) I ought to push my skill sets forward and grow into a better paycheck.
5) When others cross my boundaries I need to let them know it
6) The only freedom left in American is standing up to your boss.

a reply to: wasaka
If he is going out of his way to question your time spent in the bathroom, you can damn sure believe that he will be watching your every move now. People like that don't take kindly to people standing up to him (unless this was just an off day for him). I would be wary, but polite around him now.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: wasaka
Managing people requires a whole different skill set
and I'm saying I have what it takes, what I am saying
is this guy does not.

Coming from someone who is in senior management my professional assessment is you are both unqualified to manage others.

Hmmm, a slightly different take on your comment.

As we don't know what other attempts the poster has made in the past in resolving this dominance (?) issue, then it becomes hard to evaluated his actions.

As apparently for the short term his tactic worked, it is difficult to assess his management capabilities. It may have been correct and may not have been.

Senior management also should be able to recognize the maxim, "No harm, no foul" and let this one ride.

a reply to: wasaka

In some states, employers can regulate bathroom breaks to four 6 minute bathroom breaks a day IF you are a pay by the hour employee.

If one of my employees talked to me that way, they would be gone and denied unemployment for gross hostility in the workplace.

Your employer at least deserves the respect for his name on the door if nothing else.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: wasaka
Managing people requires a whole different skill set
and I'm not saying I have what it takes, what I am saying
is this guy does not.

Coming from someone who is in senior management my professional assessment is you are both unqualified to manage others.

I would not disagree with your professional assessment.
But remember this a sales job in a boiler room call center
where the base pay is $8 per hour.

Less than 2% of the population can be successful in sales,
and fewer still could do what I can do, in the stressful
environment that I do it, much less bare-up under the
the unprofessional office culture that I find myself in.
Everyone word is "F" this and "F" that.

By your senior management professional assessment
everyone in my office would be fired tomorrow.

Glad I don't work you. I think I'd like to keep it that way.

originally posted by: wasaka

originally posted by: woodwardjnr
a reply to: wasaka the best revenge would be to outshine him and take his position

Actually, I don't want revenge at all.

But this event has shown me a few things.
1) I have the stones to be one of owner's junkyard dogs.
2) I can express anger without hurting myself (or losing my job)
3) I am turning a corner where I demand more of myself.
4) I ought to push my skill sets forward and grow into a better paycheck.
5) When others cross my boundaries I need to let them know it
6) The only freedom left in American is standing up to your boss.

All sounds like a positive experience then

originally posted by: NewzNose
a reply to: wasaka

In some states, employers can regulate bathroom breaks to four 6 minute bathroom breaks a day IF you are a pay by the hour employee.

If one of my employees talked to me that way, they would be gone and denied unemployment for gross hostility in the workplace.

Your employer at least deserves the respect for his name on the door if nothing else.

Huh?

Okay, I guess that is you opinion. And you are welcome to it.

As you know, I don't see it that way.

I have taken enough abuse in my life, I'm not taking any more
from any one regardless of what false authority they think they
have over my bowl movements or any other body function.

Period.