I am the ULTIMATE hypocrite!

I am. I really, really am.

The thing I like most about the Internet is the same thing I hate; anonymity.

I like the fact that I can play dress up and pretend to be whatever I want to be, but at the same time it really, really annoys me that we are so disconnected and trapped in this land of make believe.

How can this be? Disconnected, yet connected?

It is quite the conundrum. Is it not?

I write many OP's extolling the virtues of being spiritual and how our souls are all connected. Without the Internet to do this how could I even begin to reach out?

And so it goes, you get bits and pieces of the truth from me, never do I reveal all of what I am to be.

I do this out of a protective stance, not necessarily to deceive. I do enjoy that many of you have no clue who or what I am and yet I still feel this desire to just lay it all out. Hypocrite.

I am. I really am.

Some days I feel as though I am completely schizophrenic, where I have multiple personalities begging to come out and so I let them from time to time, for if I don't they begin to pout.

Interestingly for the sake of this OP, I feel the need to exhibit many of these personalities here.

I will even give you their names, but only one time will I do this in the spirit of truthfulness. Never again will I refer to any of them by name again in any other OP's.

They all have different ages and genders, they even have religion for some of them (no idea why), different races and colors, some are highly spiritual and other's not a clue.

George, Lynda, Gloria, Mitch, Steve, Eddie, Elizabeth, Mary, Harry, Pushpah, Stanislav, Pepe, Moshe, Celia, Julie, Debra and William.

I will channel each and every one of these personalities at some point during the day. They have each written an OP in here. They have all replied to OP's.

I have a dominant personality in the group, but I will never reveal who that is.

Since they are all part of me though they do exhibit certain tendencies regardless.

They do all have their own interests independent of each other.

I believe we all have this capability; to be chameleons. To fluctuate between personalities and have these inflictions of hypocrisy where we feel one way one second and an entirely different way the next.

I speak for me and my 17 personalities, 18 if you want to include me.

I literally have to tell some off them to shut up, just so I can finish an OP, because they are always trying to insert their own opinion. Even right now, as I write this there are a few of them telling me to STOP! Don't do it! You are making a huge mistake revealing this to other ATS'ers. How dare you out us, you really are a HYPOCRITE!

I won the argument though.

And you waffle too much.

a reply to: EnigmaAgent

I know right, it is a complete enigma...George likes waffles though!

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

You're being awful hard on yourself there, soulpower. We're all Jock Tamson's bairns after all. We're all just human - we're all ATS!
You don't need to expose anything - you're fine just the way you are.

B x

a reply to: beansidhe

Elizabeth and Mary would beg to differ, but still you are most kind dear!

Hey I think I know Gloria, she's the one with the huge.....

a reply to: VoidHawk

Eyes? Nope she is Asian, not big anywhere!

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

I admire your openness Power. Always a worthy read.

I play my cards close to the chest if you follow me. I got trust issues, I suppose.

a reply to: dezertdog

Thanks, the brutha in me says right on! Power to the peeps!

Oh man, pull yourself together.

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

I am the ULTIMATE hypocrite!

At least you admit it.

Recognizing and owning who we are is the first step, even if we choose not to change it.

originally posted by: angeldoll
Oh man, pull yourself together.

You heard her Harry, get it together dude!

a reply to: Liquesence

Half us do at least!

I believe we all have this capability; to be chameleons. To fluctuate between personalities and have these inflictions of hypocrisy where we feel one way one second and an entirely different way the next.

But we don't necessarily have to give them names and make them real, they're just voices in our heads. I mean, even if today I feel like doing the opposite of yesterday, or contradicting myself why do I have to invent another "me" to do that? Why divide myself into many? After all they are all 'me" coming from the same head, so who am I fooling here?

Maybe you should allow yourself more to be what you are.
And by the way, are you a Virgo?

a reply to: WhiteHat

But we don't necessarily have to give them names and make them real, they're just voices in our heads. I mean, even if today I feel like doing the opposite of yesterday, or contradicting myself why do I have to invent another "me" to do that? Why divide myself into many? After all they are all 'me" coming from the same head, so who am I fooling here?

You have no idea how this works, do you?

But hey! If it works for you then, bloody obviously, it should work for the rest of the world because ... um... well, I guess you are just so awesome.

Perhaps you may want to do a little research.

P

a reply to: WhiteHat

I just follow their lead and they are the ones that have the names. I believe 2 of them are Virgins, but not sure if they are Virgo's. The personalities were definitely not all born on the same day, but it would be very difficult for me to answer what astrology sign they have, I could however do a numerology breakdown on each name if I were so inclined, that would give more insight into the personality traits they each exhibit.

originally posted by: pheonix358
a reply to: WhiteHat

But we don't necessarily have to give them names and make them real, they're just voices in our heads. I mean, even if today I feel like doing the opposite of yesterday, or contradicting myself why do I have to invent another "me" to do that? Why divide myself into many? After all they are all 'me" coming from the same head, so who am I fooling here?

You have no idea how this works, do you?

But hey! If it works for you then, bloody obviously, it should work for the rest of the world because ... um... well, I guess you are just so awesome.

Perhaps you may want to do a little research.

P

Yeah, I know right?

George, Lynda, Gloria, Mitch, Steve, Eddie, Elizabeth, Mary, Harry, Pushpah, Stanislav, Pepe, Moshe, Celia, Julie, Debra and William.....all have their own way of coping.

George doesn't care, Lynda says "mind your own business", Gloria says "to each his own", Steve is drunk, Eddie is to mild mannered to speak up, Elizabeth says "how dare you have an opinion", Mary is Mary, Harry hides behind Lynda, Pushpah says whatever her husband says she says, Stanislav just punched you in the nose, Pepe agrees with everyone, Moshe will take your side for a price, Celia just likes to dance, Julie is the moderator, Debra will tell you step off and William is always right!

It would be pretty hard to have a differing personality without different names to associate the different feelings with.

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

Well, at least you're in good company- most humans are hypocrites. It is a tendency of all. The only rarity is recognizing it.

I realized long ago that my opinions and lectures I spurt out, either in person or online, once deeply and honestly examined, are in direct conflict with my behavior. "I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it." Alice said.

So I formed this idea that all my expressions are really me talking to myself. Got into the concept of a "higher self" for a while- a part of me that is wiser in the ways of the world, that channels through me, for me, constantly.... I just often get confused and think the message was for someone else instead.

I don't know if there is a higher self, but I certainly think I have a subconscious that is always watching the interplay of self and other, and makes associations this self doesn't always catch on to.

So for years, I look at my posting that way- it is my daily lesson for myself. I sometimes go back and re-read it- it's got things in it I had no idea of before my fingers tapped it out. I try to follow my own advice now. It lessens the sense of ambivalence and confusion. Yes, I am many, but we come to a consensus eventually- we find a win-win solution everyone in here agrees on.

I did it a personality test on FB this morning, geared towards determining if you are an "Alpha" personality. I came out Low Alpha, High Beta. (85% beta, whatever that means). Those things are stupid, but I felt some real correspondence.

I don't like to be the center of attention, I don't like to be a leader, nor exactly do I find myself conforming to simple follower. It spurred my personal conflicts with my american background, which prones that it is good to be a leader, and the french idea that being a leader systematically means you are an egotistical psychopath.

I feel somewhere in between, I like being inbetween- being a mediator between the two. Being close enough to each side to be able to empathize with both, and find solutions which bring about harmony. The son between the father and the spirit; the self between the super ego and the id.

I don't relate tightly to the voice of wisdom that preaches through me sometimes, nor to the childish whine of the physical and emotional drives- they both cry out "me"! It is only that middle man who insists "us" that I feel at ease in.

I have a job in which I get to play that sort of "beta" roll, the mediator between the higher and the lower, and I feel best there.
It's being a fence sitter, a bad thing for some, but I'm fine on my fence, I can see further in both directions.