We are Doomed, the aliens will be coming to get us for sure!

I am seriously worried!

I’ve just had a few evenings dog sitting for a friend and so I took the opportunity to see what passes for entertainment on the lie box these days (I refuse to own a television).
OMG!
During one movie there were 82 commercials with a total duration of 32 minutes!
Now, 82 ads is a nuisance, but the content is what really concerns me.
In those commercials I saw the following!!!

A singing cake telling me to eat it.
Talking vegetables telling me to cook them.
Bowls of talking breakfast cerals.
I'm offered new Ultra absorbent peepee pants so that I can still "dance the night away"
Toothpaste that will cause laser beams to burst from my mouth everytime I smile.
A new bra that gives bumpy bits where there aint no bumpy bits (hey ladies, that’s fraud!)
I saw a fridge teeming with little singing plastic fridge men, and I can have buckets of dangerous chemicals to keep me safe from all those giant fang toothed germs (and cause the genocide of the little plastic fridge men!).
And what about the effing great grizly bear trying to sell me car insurance! A GRIZLY BEAR!!!

IS THIS PLANET AN ASYLUM FOR THE INSANE?!!!
Seriously! Talking products...maybe if they were aimed at children then ok, but they're not, they're aimed at adults! The walking talking Grizzly is proof of that!

After viewing this nonsense, and while picking my jaw up from the ground, I had a very worrying thought!
What will happen if aliens receive our tv transmissions and they view the commercials?
Seriously!!!
They may have little or no understanding of life on earth, so tell me, what do you suppose they're gonna be thinking when they see the following!

Grown men sloshing about in pee filled panties while they eat their talking vegetable freinds... alive!
Or
Biological weapons being used to wipe out the entire race of little plastic fridge men! And what about the f’ing great grizly bear selling car insurance ffs!
And thats not the worst of it!
Imagine what they're gonna to be thinking when they see we are armed with laser beam teeth! and they see the lady whos eyelashes are equipped with uzi’s!

I'll tell you what they'll be thinking
"Danger Will Robinson, Danger Danger!!!"
They're going to think we are totally insane and dangerous and MUST BE WIPED OUT!

I feel quite certain the moment they view the commercials they'll be headed this way, with the biggest most potent can of crazy-life-form killer they can find, and you can be sure they wont take their finger off the button until its all used up!

a reply to: VoidHawk

I'm worried that you counted every ad and kept a timer going for them...

a reply to: VoidHawk

Man, what channel were you watching?

That is some trippy sounding stuff right there.

I'm not a big tv watcher. I own one but, I normally stream anything that interests me because tv just sucks...period

Btw, what the heck does a bear have to do with insurance? I realize that is part of your point. So, I guess I'm just wondering why anyone would think a bear would prompt someone to buy insurance. I guess if you live in Alaska and it's life insurance but, come on...that's just weird.

ETA: Just turned the boob tube on for poops and giggles after reading your thread and it was an Elvis impersonator trying to sell state farm insurance.

LOL!!!!! Yep.

Did you get all the subliminal messages I snuck in there as well?

a reply to: VoidHawk

Take advantage of tv commercials. they give you enough time to go pee and a beer refill.

You're kidding ... right? Tell me you're kidding. It's been so long since I've actually paid any real attention to ads that the last one I remember is that stupid Salt and Peppa one.

It's all frippery, the message is : ''get flippant: buy stuff'', ''less thinking:more consuming'' etc.

At least you didn't get bombarded with the worst of it all: Xfactor, Strictly, BB house etc. Vanity, narcissism, judgmentalism and crassness all rolled into one.

The Yesterday channel, BBC3 /4 are good and the occasional series on the main programmes are worth watching.

a reply to: VoidHawk

Now Void, I love you, but after watching those ads you main concern is what it will do to aliens? How about what it's doing to us earthlings and our brains?

On the other hand, yeah let them wipe us out. Maybe if we start over, things will develop better the next time around.

a reply to: VoidHawk
OMG I just laughed so hard I may need some of the peepee pants that let me keep dancing
Honestly you are just lucky you were watching in the daytime. Wait until the commercials start with "Bob" selling his "wood" pills (its in the commercial!) but my favorite is still the Viagra pills where they are all just hanging out with a bunch of dudes (is that supposed to make it cool?). Hey man, I got Viagra and now I own a 65 Mustang. (its really a commercial)

Jeez Voidhawk pal, you okay? Being exposed to that much commercialism could bring about a spending spree. Now that is something to avoid believe me.

I own a T.V and I spend a great deal on my package through Sky, which Mrs Cobaltic constantly threatens to cancel, but she can't because it's all in my name. I work hard, so I'll decide what I want to watch and simply ignore the ads.

It's all B.S dude, it's simply the Capitalist way. How many of those products being advertised, were made by the same multi national? A very large percentage, without a doubt.

a reply to: ketsuko

HAHA! YES my wife and I still cannot get that damnable Salt n Peppa commercial out of our miserable skulls..."Im pushing Im pushing it good!"

Aliens would probably not survive so much garbage being presented in such short time.

I see ads and programming here in the states that makes me think,"How did someone sell that idea then get paid to produce and air it?" I never really consider the insanity of what they show, but I mostly ignore them.

However, what you describe on the tele in the UK sounds like the inmates are truly running the asylum now. I think I'll be more critical during the commercial breaks from now on. I actually find what you said to be pretty disturbing.

a reply to: VoidHawk

LOL. funny post OP one of the main reasons i don't own nor see TV is because of the retarded commercials the brain wash you to "buy buy buy" or "obey obey obey".

a reply to: VoidHawk

So what you are saying is you had a "relapse" or a "slip", as I've heard it put, if your are an addict. (to media, drugs, alcohol, sex, and/or crap in general)
Which it seems you may be

My advice. Suck it up, Blow it off, Get centered and get back to real life!
Or... Get in there and wallow around, I mean..... REALLY GET IN TO IT!!,,,
until you have had enough.

Either way it's your life..

It's a double Fn post!!!!!!! Wha!!

I remember there was a time when commercials used to be entertaining at least like they were trying. Now I think ad execs are phoning it in they're so stupid. When I do bother to watch and pay attention, I can't figure out how they manage to sell anything with those ads. Not many of them are very appealing any more.

I hope everything having to do with materialism & marketing burns in a fiery hell. & soon.

God, PLZ take me with it.

You think that's bad, here's the one they aired in the US...


hehe

originally posted by: Shamrock6
a reply to: VoidHawk

I'm worried that you counted every ad and kept a timer going for them...

No need to be worried! My friend has this magic box thingy that records stuff for him while he's out, it was while playing with it that I discovered it marks where the ads start and where they end so that he can skip them during playback. It gave me far more info than I posted!