This barber will publicly shame your misbehaving kid with an old man’s haircut

a reply to: IShotMyLastMuse

I don't think some kids can be reasoned with by having a mere "conversation" with them. Children's brains aren't fully formed yet, and things like consequences and sense of time aren't firmly cemented into their psyche.

Frankly, I think we've gotten to soft of kids these days and look the other way while they run amok -- often diagnosing them with titles such as ADD or ADHD when in fact they just need some discipline.

I have a lot of friends that probably would be diagnosed with ADD or ADHD if they were to have grown up in today's society. They were handled as troublesome kids, and guess what? They ALL turned out fine. Sure, they spent time in the principal's office or in time out quite a bit -- but it forced them to learn to change their behaviors.

We always want a scapegoat to point at, a reason and place to put blame. Often we scramble and claw at the scientific community to give us a diagnosis. We'd much rather assume little Johnny has some kind of illness that is out of our control than to face the fact that we're failing as parents. No one wants to assume responsibility for anything in today's society, and it's not just parents.

originally posted by: HomerinNC
a reply to: Annee

We (his mother and I) did start early. When he threw a temper tantrum, we tried punish him by sending him to his room, when he acted out in there, I spanked him. He hasnt thrown a fit since. Nowadays, he is well behaved and polite.
Dont get me wrong, I DO blame the parents when they get to this point, the parents should have put their foot down when they were younger, but with the threat of child abuse looms over their heads JUST for disciplining a child, thanks to all the liberals out there, these parents dont know what to do.
Myself, I didnt give a damn, if he acted out, he got the belt, just as I did.

I use a tall stool. I started when he was 3. I put the stool in the middle of the room. He can't touch anything, play with anything, and he's in full view. And he has to start the conversation, respectfully, to get off the stool. Works great for kids who think they can just clam up and not discuss their behavior.

At 6 he already knows these words/phrases: personal responsibility, discretion, appropriate, inappropriate, manners, and "Your friend does not invite you back, their parents do"

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun

originally posted by: AutumnWitch657
Whats the difference between a spanking and a beating? The location where the blows land that's it. reply to: ladyinwaiting

Umm... No. A spanking is an open-handed slap on the buttocks. It doesn't do any more than cause mild pain and a little humiliation. A beating is something entirely different. A beating would implying closed fists and landing blows elsewhere on the body such as the chest, arms, legs, face, etc. A spanking doesn't even leave a bruise, at worst it leaves a little red mark.

I really can't stand it when people call a spanking "child abuse"

Yes, you are 100% correct! Although, it doesn't even have to leave a little red mark. With small children they get the idea mostly, that you are very displeased and the behavior should not be repeated.

A beating will typically leave bruising, with or without "an instrument", and can cause injuries.

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun
When I was 14. I called my mom the "b" word. Once.

A cast iron pan upside the head corrected that behaviour awful fast. Never called my mom the "b" ever again.

Kids these days are far too coddled.

Wooden spoon for me across the arse.

originally posted by: MystikMushroom

Frankly, I think we've gotten to soft of kids these days and look the other way while they run amok -- often diagnosing them with titles such as ADD or ADHD when in fact they just need some discipline.

You obviously have not had an ADD kid.

But, I had a great doctor for my daughter, who didn't believe in excuses. His first words to me where: your child needs to be responsible for her own behavior. She will need to learn how to, but it is her responsibility.

originally posted by: AutumnWitch657
And that thousands of years of sparing the rod has given us a violent war prone society so much for that example. reply to: HomerinNC

No, the greed of a powerful elite have spawned that...

I don't advocate child abuse.
Not to turn that kid over the knee for some hide tanning action when they desperately need attitude adjustment and the soft discipline doesn't work and the parent continues to let them act the way they do, is far more detrimental to the child.

Sometimes your kids need some tough love even though you don't want to give it to them.

originally posted by: crazyewok

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun
When I was 14. I called my mom the "b" word. Once.

A cast iron pan upside the head corrected that behaviour awful fast. Never called my mom the "b" ever again.

Kids these days are far too coddled.

Wooden spoon for me across the arse.

I got too used to spankings for it to really affect me, especially being a rebellious 14 year old girl.

a reply to: crazyewok

The hand was the worst for me and my bro.
If we were acting up when the lights went out my dad would sneak in after giving us a rolocking hide under the bed and wait til we started again and then I would feel something at the bottom of my bed and I would pull back the covers and my Dads hand was at the end of the bed scurrying around like the Thing out of the Addams family.
Oh I screamed and screamed lol .

a reply to: HomerinNC
fine by me, what about being grounded? taking away cellphone? internet access? gaming rig? not having a birthday party?
anything that does not involve public humiliation?

Your dad sounds alot like mine!!, he was a slightly more responsible version of peter griffin!! We only got a smack of the arse in extreme cases, we knew we'd pushed to far. a reply to: boymonkey74

a reply to: MystikMushroom

I totally agree with your overall statement, parents today delegate their responsibilities to internet and video games, those are doing the parenting today, and then children row up with a lack of control, and sort of run wild.
But my question is why does everything have to have this public or viral nature to it, i remember last year seeing a video of a mother that went to her daughter's school and made a video shaming her for skipping school, and uploaded it to youtube or facebook.
I mean come on!
I know now you can't slap your kids (i got slapped a few times, and grew up fine, but i guess now kids are made of porcelain or something) but how about actively being involved? like i said in another reply, removing internet, cellphone, gaming privileges, grounding them for a week, forcing them to do choirs around the house, whatever.
Parents are soft, and strong parenting should be encouraged, but how about something less embarrassing?

Imo anyone that does this expects society to punish/discipline their children for them. They did their best now it's our turn. Good luck with that. Imo some parents expect society/teachers/LE to raise their kids and feel quite entitled to our participation.

We didn't need to impose misbehaving children or our parenting method on society to make it work. It was solely our responsibility to raise good adults.

Frankly society doesn't want to see you discipline your kids or take part in it. If they're that out of control and you can't rein them in maybe you all should just stay home.

If you chose to raise obnoxious brats that's your choice but don't expect me or society to play a role in your twisted social experiment. I'll disappoint you, I won't react in the way you expect or desire. If kids have no respect for parents, most likely they won't respect anyone in society or their opinions.

Imo public shaming is lazy and will fuel more hate/disrespect. Especially in kids who already show little respect for much of anything. If you allow society to "fix" your problems, you lose all control. You can't dictate how it goes and could do more harm. If your kids are emotionally disturbed instead of taking them to the barber/exorcist or priest get them/you to a doc a.s.a.p.

Purposely turning kids into a joke for all to laugh at might not send the message you desire. Young minds simply don't process info like adults. If you actually talk to kids you'll discover how different their thought processes work. That's why kids often say the darnedest things.

Failing to instil respect in children doesn't happen over night. I have family who's out of control children grew into out of control adults. They let those kids run amok on everyone in the family when they were very small. Back then it was cute or they had a million excuses why their behavior was acceptable or should be ignored. How can these parents possibly expect their children will suddenly grow a conscience once they're turned loose on society?

I was punched hard on the top of my head by my 4 yr. old nephew, saw stars, just for putting his shoes on. He head butted my older son, threw a can of play dough at my youngest, raised a welt on his forehead and broke our aquarium. This was all in one visit. A few days prior he punched a caseworker in the face so hard he broke his glasses. All because the guy bent down, said hi. When my hubby complained the whole family jumped our s#%&, we were/are the black sheep.

Now he's 25 an alcoholic/can't work and his younger sis who he was allowed to abuse willy-nilly is a heroin addict. No one can figure out why, must be a medical thing.

heard about this, this morning.

Love it.

a reply to: HomerinNC

I don't want to make this patriarchal but the examples you showed the dads were missing the 13yrs old dad seemed weak, but OMG I cannot imagine my mom taking that kind of crap from me or my sister , forget about dad that stank eye alone would turn your blood to ice, then there was the aunts and to a lesser extent uncles, grandma was the only rescue if she didn't hand you over for whats coming, I had hit my eldest daughter once because during a dressing down she struck her mom and I wasn't having that, I must admit I felt really bad but I kept that emotion between myself and my wife, she never knew how much it pained me to do that.

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun

originally posted by: crazyewok

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun
When I was 14. I called my mom the "b" word. Once.

A cast iron pan upside the head corrected that behaviour awful fast. Never called my mom the "b" ever again.

Kids these days are far too coddled.

Wooden spoon for me across the arse.

I got too used to spankings for it to really affect me, especially being a rebellious 14 year old girl.

OMG - helping raise a 14 year old granddaughter now.

Who was raised to be very independent. Single working mother, etc.

It may serve her as she develops her own life. Maybe. If she doesn't mouth off to the wrong person.

a reply to: HomerinNC

How dreadful. So, the kid who is acting out because he feels unseen and unheard now gets humiliated because his or her parents can't control him? If your kid acts out, take their toy away, put them in time out, make them clean something. But to purposely shame them is just wrong. Parents need to learn how to parent. You get more bees with honey. Teach them respect by example. The parents are at fault for their under-10 year olds. Any parent who would do this is a jerk and a fail parent.

Learn how to parent or keep your legs closed. Parents are supposed to PROTECT THEIR CHILDREN FROM BULLYING.

a reply to: Morningglory

you have it right. I think everyone should pay close attention to what you posted.

Is America really to the point that a bad haircut is considered child abuse by some?

C'mon now, employ some common sense. The kid ain't getting beat. In america it's basically illegal to discipline your children anymore. And the children KNOW this. They don't fear any consequences for their actions anymore. If getting a bad haircut is child abuse in America, I'm so glad I don't live there anymore. You guys can keep that mess.

a reply to: ScientificRailgun

you're missing the point. Parents have a duty to protect their children. Punishment is all well and good. But opening one's child up to punishment from those that are not the child's parents is simply abhorrent.

It's like saying, ok hey I can't discipline my kid--so you do it for me.

And it's wrong.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

originally posted by: rukia
a reply to: ScientificRailgun

you're missing the point. Parents have a duty to protect their children. Punishment is all well and good. But opening one's child up to punishment from those that are not the child's parents is simply abhorrent.

It's like saying, ok hey I can't discipline my kid--so you do it for me.

And it's wrong.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

Getting laughed at in school or on the playground is part of growing up. Kids get picked on, it happens. Whether it's a bad haircut, farting in class, forgetting your books, saying something silly, etc. Embarrassment and Humiliation help shape young minds and learn what is socially acceptable and what is not. I don't really see this as "pushing the punishment onto others". You're punishing the child with a bad haircut. What happens after that is simply a learning experience for the child.