Trailing memories that wont let you go

Notice that most of the time the memory is not present. Notice that it appears now and then. It comes and goes in the still space that you are.
Notice the space.

Originally posted by RisenAngel77
You know those moments when you finally arrive at a stage where you say "Aha! I can finally move forward!" you feel happy, you go about your day boosting your confidence. You even say " I will beat life!" then something pops up, as if fate was teasing you, and has you see something that reminds you of that one person you cared deeply about but yet got you hurt so bad?

You try and push it out of your mind, continue about your way, but yet another thing appears, could be a name, could be something you talked about with that person, could be a song, or a movie recommended. It's like, you want to forget, but it follows you.

has anyone had this happen before?

Maybe the subconscious is trying to manifest the memories, and keep it alive? Or is it that my heart just deeply misses the person?


Mourning a loss sucks, but it got me curious about this phenomenon and why it tends to manifest when you least expect it.

This happens to everyone. Memories are NOT to be thrown away or discarded or ignored. To many do this, that why they blow up and go crazy from time to time. You have to deal with the bad, just as well as the good. They make us who we are. If you remember a time that broke your heart or that sucked, and get depressed and crappy from it, that is a different issue. I learn from those bad memories. I keep them fresh. Yes she broke my heart, yes I got fired for goofing off etc ... You/me/all ultimately made the decision to be in a situation that turned sour. We have to take some responsibility for our actions. Now, one needs to take those moments and ask, how do I avoid this in the future? Or, how do I make it better ? How do I keep my eyes open to deceiving people ? What are the signs. Its not to hard.

If you feed a memory or a thought it will never leave.
Feelings and memories are just visitors. Be the one who sees the visitors come and go.

reply to post by Xaphan


If you continue running from what you fear, how can you learn from it? As others pointed out, and reminded me of what I should be doing, it is actually important to have those memories. Because they are keys to a lesson that needs to be learned.

One thing I learned is that when ever something does follow you, it means there is a reason for it, and chances are it is divine.

It is obvious something is not allowing me to move forward from this experience. And this judging from both memories creeping in and some posts here by some users, reminding me how important those experiences actually are.


Thanks everyone.

Originally posted by VI0811

Originally posted by RisenAngel77
You know those moments when you finally arrive at a stage where you say "Aha! I can finally move forward!" you feel happy, you go about your day boosting your confidence. You even say " I will beat life!" then something pops up, as if fate was teasing you, and has you see something that reminds you of that one person you cared deeply about but yet got you hurt so bad?

You try and push it out of your mind, continue about your way, but yet another thing appears, could be a name, could be something you talked about with that person, could be a song, or a movie recommended. It's like, you want to forget, but it follows you.

has anyone had this happen before?

Maybe the subconscious is trying to manifest the memories, and keep it alive? Or is it that my heart just deeply misses the person?


Mourning a loss sucks, but it got me curious about this phenomenon and why it tends to manifest when you least expect it.

This happens to everyone. Memories are NOT to be thrown away or discarded or ignored. To many do this, that why they blow up and go crazy from time to time. You have to deal with the bad, just as well as the good. They make us who we are. If you remember a time that broke your heart or that sucked, and get depressed and crappy from it, that is a different issue. I learn from those bad memories. I keep them fresh. Yes she broke my heart, yes I got fired for goofing off etc ... You/me/all ultimately made the decision to be in a situation that turned sour. We have to take some responsibility for our actions. Now, one needs to take those moments and ask, how do I avoid this in the future? Or, how do I make it better ? How do I keep my eyes open to deceiving people ? What are the signs. Its not to hard.

I didn't choose to have my grandparents die or choose to have them die on my bday. So please tell me how i had a choice to be the situation or not. And how did my actions have anything to do with there deaths? There is no possable way i could have avoided it? how can anyone avoid that?

reply to post by RisenAngel77


Just let it happen, no pushing away anyhing. It's hard but it's also the best way. Accepting that that is what you feel and remember.

Eventually, everything will pass.

reply to post by MountainLaurel

I'll be okay I suppose. I've never actually tried to act out these fantasies of blowing my own candle out. I've had suicidal thoughts since I was eleven and I'm still alive 13 years later, so it's just a nuisance having to deal with it.