Subject: Ugly birds ruin the romantic coastline of Mauritius.
Dear fellow artists and explorers
As our literature has also discussed recently, much of our newly discovered lands and islands are a stark mixture of romantic beauty, and common
Perhaps nature can be red in tooth and claw, but nature can be tamed and improved, just like the savage child can learn the harpsichord, or a plot of
weeds and useless forest can be turned into a delightful garden.
It is such a disappointment for the eye to see the coastline of Mauritius, and it's fragrant lushness, and then when one steps ashore one is
confronted with the most revolting bird in the world!
Words can not suffice to describe this hideous pigeon.
It swaggers about with it's lewd posterior like a crippled turkey.
It cannot fly, nor does it pick the soil with it's over-sized beak.
It has completely outlived its natural purpose.
As exploring men we understand that we face not only savages, bears and tigers.
These creatures are purely Cartesian, and when they cry or squawk it is just the air coming out.
However, we also face the ugliness of nature.
All the kings and queens have beautiful gardens - and we know that this is how natural beauty should look.
Our marvelous and tasteful royalty wanted all manners of exotic beasts for their collections; but none will want this atrocity of a bird.
Artists should refuse to draw or paint this creature.
What is worse is that it cannot be cooked to any degree of satisfaction, and we need to begin an effort to remove it, since even the common sailor
refuses to chew on it's breasts.
Nevertheless, most of the countrysides from the Cape to Batavia could be made into something useful and pleasing to the senses.
For the moment we can set the example as illustrators.
Just look at the great southern continent, for example.
With a bit of imagination their big bouncing beasts could be made to look like a graceful deer!
Or their amusing trees could almost seem like tea-trees!
Whatever the case, I refuse to return to the company or any court with a drawing of an unsightly and indecent bird.
A loyal artist and explorer (to whatever king or queen rules when I get back).
edit on 11-12-2011 by halfoldman because: (no reason given)