Owners of AboveTopSecret.com Announce Their Candidacy For President of the United States.

Originally posted by subject x
It must be true, or they'd have to ban themselves for hoaxing.
It's in the T&Cs, right?

First this thread will be placed in the skunk works section, then into the hoax section. Then Mrs. Schnittzel will come on and say how angry she is that people mistreated her husband Bernard. At about this time Sorcha Faal will decide to run for president as a counter to the ATS moderators.

I can see the scandals now:

The public will want to see Sorcha's real birth certificate to see what sex he/she is. The public will find it impossible to vote for the ATS site owners because when they enter the voting booths all the names will be different colors and the familiar icons they used on the campaign trail will be new and complexly different and the elderly won't be able to understand.

Despite the tough call, the ATS site owners will win, and when it's their turn to say the oath of office they will first inspect the bible to make sure it's not a hoaxed book and will confirm the oath via computer satellite from their underground base on the moon.

The constitution will be scrapped and the T&C's will be heralded as the new laws of the coming epoch. Anyone caught engaging in political dissent will have a giant Stop Sign placed over their face. A despotic dictatorship will reign, with the minority citizens marked with a Stop Sign being sent to concentration camps called Skunk Work internment forums. If they act on good behavior they are sent to a camp called Below Top Secret.com, to live their life in perpetual boredom and know always that they are living in the 'other', less exciting ATS website. Those who disobey will be banned, never to return again unless they make a new account.

Congratulations to member Billxam for completing and winning yesterdays ats saltine challenge.Bill ate 6 saltines without the aid of fluids.He has uploaded his performance on yesterdays thread the ats saltine challenge.

reply to post by filosophia


hehe --- haha



Sorry thats all i ahve to add tothat... although i agree 100% I am just in a giggly mood tonight

lol Thanks for the giggles and grins.

reply to post by BlackOps719


That's my dream team. I'm voting for Ron Paul regardless of whether or not Jesse Ventura runs as his vice(Slim chance).

It would be hilarious if this gets picked up by news agencies and announced as legit.
That would really be a sign of T.E.A.T.

I ain't american but with these crazy times and considering they are the owners of ATS I would vote for one of these guys if I was american. ( I don't think this is a joke btw I really don't see how these busy man would do such thing as time worth so much )

Good luck with it, lot of work ahead but still possible.


thruthseek3r

I'm definitely not voting for them.
These guys would just end up being a bunch of fear mongering nut jobs with power.

We need to start producing T-shirts with a really hot chick with big TEATS so we can advertise for the campaign. Count me in, I vote for anyone who advertises with a set of big ol TEATS!!!

Originally posted by DuceizBack
I'm definitely not voting for them.
These guys would just end up being a bunch of fear mongering nut jobs with power.

That is what I said about the last presidential election.

So... They will be running against Boondock-Saint
or will they ask for him/her to join their team?
It would be sad to see ATS divided on such an
important question, in such dire times...

Congrats to the marketing brains behind the look of this candidacy! LOL I hope Overlord and Springer can tell us how it feels to be sitting in a puppets chair soon enough!

reply to post by AlienCarnage


At first I thought maybe that could be some sort of secondary motive for the joke. To prove ignorance by staging a fake Presidential campaign that gets some kind of recognition, and then everyone knows the only cure for ignorance is ATS! How convenient, cue confetti and the giant red, white and blue "Deny Ignorance" banner. Doubles as a little spotlight for the website.

But the 2013 website needs more work and a sprinkle of propaganda wouldn't hurt. Maybe I am thinking too much into it though, maybe they just poured a scotch and thought it might be funny.

However I do appreciate the potentially limitless number of wisecracks that can be made with the TEAT acronym.

Dudes, awesome April Fool's Day

HAHAHAHA!!!!! Awesome! Gotta love April 1. Either way, you have my vote

reply to post by Fromabove


Yeah, actually this occurred to me the other day: I love ATS and have a blast being involved, and thanks to everyone for the stars, and for the one applause I received (took forever to figure out how to trace it to its source)....BUT

Since we talk about "shadow governments" on here like it's a bad thing....I want to mention that the other day it did occur to me that the site owners themselves run a "shadow staff" who are "invited" to be called "Writers" etc (which I consider myself anyway, with or without anyone's recognition)!! My thought was...."Wait a minute....! Why does ATS have a 'Shadow Government' - someone watching what's going on, removing inappropriate posts, insisting on manners and decorum, and handing out Applause....??"

unfortunately, I know why! Uh, because without it, this would be just another stupid site like (IMO) Facebook.

(Actually, as an author, I was delighted to see that my very first day I got applause!! It's always nice to be acknowledged positively!) (But OTOH, I would rather be invited into the elite circle that DECIDES who gets applause! hint, hint, wink wink)

It is sad that overseers are a requirement when only adults are participating - but it is a necessity. In fact, if these guys (you guys) WERE going to run, I would consider voting for them (you) - as long as they (you) exposed everything...and honestly what tipped me off that it was a 4/1 joke was the claim that the world is going to end anyway...he he.

But then again, I have decided that voting is really just a hoax and we are all tools of TPTB. Especially after the Florida debacle with Bush's usurpation of the presidency. Not that Gore would have been a better president - it's the principle of the thing.

What frightens me is the shadow government of our nation/globe that treats us all like we're of no consequence - "sheeple" or not, we are in a fenced corral, kept away from what's real, and that, my friends, is worrisome indeed.

Cheers! Happy day and stay alert! Hey, if anyone figures it all out - the whole global mess - let me know!

LOL

Thanks, this brought me a much-needed smile.

I'd like to know your stand on internet/media censorship. If elected will you declare all MSM sources as a clear and present danger to the stability of the US and place a blanket ban on all broadcasts?

Where politics is about comprimise...if you pull FOX's broadcast licence I will consider your promise kept.

Originally posted by BlackOps719

Ron Paul and Jessie Ventura in 2012!!!!!!

Sorry S.O........(If these guys dont run you and Springer have my vote)

This times infinity!

Was there much use of airbrushing for the candidate pics.

Made me titter.

reply to post by SkepticOverlord


Can either of you guys produce a long-form birth certificate ?

And how do we know that you guys are using legit ssn's ?