Dr. Strangebrew: How I Learned To Stop Worrying About Radiation and Love Soda and Beer

Now that the fallout from the Fukushima Disaster has travelled fully around the globe, and with no end in site to the spewing of radioactive materials from The Earth's new nuclear "open wound", I have decided to create a plan for nourishing my body's need for water and hydration...while taking in as little Iodine-131 and Cesium-137 as possible.

Being a cautious and paranoid conspiracy theorist, I was smart enough to acquire at least 30 gallons on bottled water to store safely in my home for emergency use, just in case radioactive fallout somehow made it into our water supply (which it has, as we already know). But 30 gallons won't be enough to keep me radiation free forever. 300 gallons wouldn't be enough. Eventually we will run out of "clean", uncontaminated water.

So yesterday while out with a friend listening to live music in Greenwich Village I decided on a plan for extending my health as long as possible...by seriously starting to consume bottled beer and canned soda on a regular basis.

My reasoning is that there is enough bottled beer and canned soda in America to last us for decades, and this, supplemented with the occasional bottle of natural spring water, will keep me away from the harmful effects of Cesium-137 and Iodine-131 for a long enough time until this Fukushima problem is solved and they put a cap on those reactors.

As of yesterday I have stopped drinking tap water completely. I am really starting to love my vending machine at work now. Thank god for Mountain Dew and Diet Pepsi! They are the new water!

reply to post by windwaker


they need water to make that stuff, their going to use water from municipal sources,and also contains flouride, aspartame mercury and other toxins on top of radiation,plus a diet like that would disease u for sure,learn to love death instead buddy

reply to post by windwaker


Yes!!!

Finally, a solution I can get behind! I'll be heading to buy a 12 pack of PBR right now!

Originally posted by CUJOCREEP
reply to post by windwaker

 

they need water to make that stuff, their going to use water from municipal sources,and also contains flouride, aspartame mercury and other toxins on top of radiation,plus a diet like that would disease u for sure,learn to love death instead buddy

Star for you .....how can you avoid it ???? you cant

reply to post by windwaker

Mountain Dew is the worst thing to drink. Especially if you want to protect yourself from radioactive iodine.

www.naturalthyroidchoices.com...
preventdisease.com...
periodictable.com...
www.smithchiro.net/articles/Bromide%20Toxicity.doc
www.holistichorse.com...

There is tons of info on this. Just google mountain dew+bromine.

reply to post by CUJOCREEP


I think the Cesium-137 will do more harm than the aspartame and fluoride, so I might as well enjoy my water flavored and/or spiked.

It's also psychological. By drinking pre-packaged drinks I can take the blame of death off of me and put in on the big evil corporations who are deliberately trying to pollute my body.

Drinking Caesium-137 water from the tap is like willfully drinking from the poisoned chalice. I ain't going out like that. If I look closely at that glass of tap water I might see those Plutonium particles floating around.

reply to post by babyduck


I didn't know there was vegetable oil in Mountain Dew. Now this is really depressing.

Everyone loves Mountain Dew, but it also kills. I think that there has been a plan to kill off people for a long time.

Well okay then. Instead of Mountain Dew I'll choose Schwepps Ginger Ale.

reply to post by The Sword



If things are going to go downhill we better start having fun...NOW!

I already have a reverse osmosis filter under the sink, so I'm ready. You guys can glow in the dark - I'll be swilling cool, clear, mostly iodine and cesium free water. At least until the membranes pop a leak.

reply to post by Bedlam


My parents have one in their home in Florida. If the water situation gets really bad, maybe I'll head down there.

Originally posted by windwaker
reply to post by Bedlam

 

My parents have one in their home in Florida. If the water situation gets really bad, maybe I'll head down there.

Yeah, I'm in Florida too, and we got one because the water was sorta "tasty", only not in a good way. Some people here like the flavor.

We first got one in Huntsville - Huntsville water is extremely awful when the algae's a'bloomin' in the Tennessee River. It tastes like I'd imagine chemically treated yak urine would taste. We got used to RO. Now I'm ruined.

About the only water I like better is the well water from the old Bedlam homestead in North Georgia - there's a crank well with a bucket and a tin dipper that used to be THE water supply when the house was first built. It's still good water, nothing better on a hot day. On the other hand, the outhouse is still there too, but indoor plumbing is a definite improvement.

reply to post by The Sword


Noo! Not PBR..

Oh well. I guess PBR is fine..

On that note, I do want beer...

Originally posted by CUJOCREEP
reply to post by windwaker

 

they need water to make that stuff

But the stuff that's already bottled will have used pre-radiation water

However, just to be safe, I'm going to stick to 12 year old malt whisky. And vintage wine. Should be okay with them

reply to post by Essan


Wine sounds great. We should make an official list of bottled pre-radiation items containing water that we can drink.

Hey, radioactive water is something you used to have to pay for! There are still radon spas. It used to be really big back at the turn of the 20th century - I seem to recall that some soft drinks were touted as having radioactive water in them for your health. Now, it's free! Think of it as an imported health drink.

reply to post by Miraj


Either PBR or a growler of Hill Farmstead.

Better ixnay on the beer talkay as I'm sure the mods won't like it.