Where on Earth does something like this happen?

ET,

Hey bud!

My spin? Come out of the shell and take a chance! When God delivers you a cute woman on your doorstep, you say a quick prayer of thanks, throw a thumbs up at the creator, turn to the woman, and say "Hey, have you eaten yet? I know this great place for food, drinks, and music..." and then go ANYWHERE where that might actually have all of these things.

If she turns out to be nuts you'll at least have gone out on that limb and had some fun!

~Heff

Hey John how ya doing? I had a slight emergency the other day and never had a chance to reply to your u2u.

First you have a woman brave enough to live in a foreign land by herself, in a country where outsiders think of it as a modern wild wild west.

Second she had seen your vehicles stickers and may have noticed you before and may be an empath and is confident in her ability so she went for it.

Was she not correct?

Third she was in your personal space in the ride to town and if she is an empathy felt comfortable enough to give you her number. Then after a time when you were did not act like a wolf in heat calling her she felt comfortable enough to come to your door and do a woo who is anybody home.

I find it all rather charming in a quirky kind of way.

I have been shown many times in the past that fate is something we choose. Some know when to respond to an opportunity of fate and some tremble and say...I don't know it sounds kind of weird.

John you know most people now days are fearful zombies that have forgotten the ability we are all born with to navigate the unknown. Dont listen to any zombie minded people on ATS either, its full of them.

This could very well be a sign from the creator for you to live again. To live means taking chances. Take it from a brother Firefighter life is not worth living until you hang it out on the edge is it?

Call her. Ask her out.

Live my friend.

reply to post by Esoteric Teacher


Yeah. Squish. Great movie. I like your avatar, btw.

Originally posted by Hefficide

If she turns out to be nuts you'll at least have gone out on that limb and had some fun!

~Heff

Thanks Heff. Crazy women are interesting for sure, which is one reason I probably haven't been in a good relationship for years. To tell the truth I've sort of placed myself on the "do not call list" and off market / not looking for quite a while now. I'm not too afraid of crazy, but are my standards this ... I don't questionable, I guess. Like GEL said, there are plenty of red flag indicators here. But maybe she just has a different outlook on life and people. It's not a bad thing to assume the good in people, is it? On the other hand, what the hell could somebody be thinking to put themselves in a seemingly awkward situation?

Crazy can be fun, though

Originally posted by LoneGunMan
Hey John how ya doing? I had a slight emergency the other day and never had a chance to reply to your u2u.

No worries, glad to see you are still around after my long absence

First you have a woman brave enough to live in a foreign land by herself, in a country where outsiders think of it as a modern wild wild west.

That is gutsy, I'll give her that. It's just hard to gauge her intentions until I learn more, I guess.

Second she had seen your vehicles stickers and may have noticed you before and may be an empath and is confident in her ability so she went for it.

Was she not correct?

Good point. I'm not a violent type. War, yes, but I was fire/rescue and a medic. Not trying to hurt people, rather putting them back together.

Third she was in your personal space in the ride to town and if she is an empathy felt comfortable enough to give you her number. Then after a time when you were did not act like a wolf in heat calling her she felt comfortable enough to come to your door and do a woo who is anybody home.

I find it all rather charming in a quirky kind of way.

Very mixed feelings here on my end, on my part. Maybe the universe is just an amazing place. Karma ... could there really be such a thing, or am I an softy with dreams, still some innocent child at heart wondering "what if?"

John you know most people now days are fearful zombies that have forgotten the ability we are all born with to navigate the unknown. Dont listen to any zombie minded people on ATS either, its full of them.

I think may think about it for a few more days, see if any neighbors know her if I see them out when walking Fido, this canine that lives with me. Not sure if I am justified in calling him "my dog", cause this simian is probably his simian more than he is my dog.

This could very well be a sign from the creator for you to live again. To live means taking chances. Take it from a brother Firefighter life is not worth living until you hang it out on the edge is it?

Call her. Ask her out.

Live my friend.

However it works out, if it does I'll mention it in this thread. I figure she has sorta come on to me ... strongly ... three times in one month. Maybe someone is trying to say something. But, I know now I'm more of a be friends first and test the waters kind of guy before I jump right in, rather than wanting a one night stand or casual relationship. Friendship is important to me.

Thanks LoneGunMan,
John

Really, it depends on your viewpoint, even though it is quite coincidental!
firstly, as me being a woman, I know how they work.
She could've sounded smart but you really dont know who this woman is, she could genuinely not wanted to walk or maybe she saw all your stickers and was under the impression you had alot of money (im assuming that people that were in the war do) and decided to do a bit of golddigging. You dont know how long she has been around for and maybe she saw you as a potential target.
Also, if someone just let themselves into my house at that time expecially if your car was not there for a lift that also makes me second guess their intentions, why does she always come that late?
You also said that she came past your house in a taxi and waved at you, so why did she not catch a taxi back from wherever she was? Or do taxis not run that late in your area?

But on the flip side:
As you said you had not been in a relationship for a while because of your work hours but now you have settled down, I myself believe that everything happens for a reason so maybe this is some sort of gift to you
As you said you served in the war, so im sure your gut instinct is alot stronger than the majority of people and the fact you did not pick up on anything strange is quite significant.
She could just be extremely friendly and outgoing, and concidering she is by herself she may have thought the company was nice and just pretended that she needed the second lift. Haha

Just looking at it from both sides
But my opinion is, why not see where it goes? It will kill you if you dont do anything about it and wonder where it could have gone.
So call the woman already.

Well if you find her attractive and friendly ...go for it, try to get to know her and her intentions, before doing anything "serious" though

personally, I am 30 and happily married for 2 years, with 1 kid now.

Nevertheless before I knew my wife, i used to be quite a player and any "easy - to - get" girl would make me feel bored of that girl very fast. Needless to say, first time I met my wife we were hating each other.....

reply to post by Esoteric Teacher


Dude, you're joking right? You're sitting there writing to us on ATS when you could be doing the inverted aardvark with a cute, 20 something, English girl?
Oh man...sounds like a bad edition of Penthouse Letters.
Reading your story reminds me of that scene in Animal House with the guy and the devil on one of his shoulders and an angel on the other.

Look, she gave you her phone number and told you to call her sometime right? So do it. Make a date somewhere in town, get to know her and who knows, maybe you'll find your match...maybe not.
Maybe she gave you her number because she is bored and frustrated and just wants to bump uglies with someone. Either way, it's a win/win for you.

reply to post by Esoteric Teacher


Who knows it could turn out to be good for you? But as other posters have said be careful and be cautious because who knows she could be a serial killer, although chances are she isn't.

I'm pretty sure she is just keen mate ;-)

Sounds like a great woman, maybe a bit weird/different, but hey.

Lets look at this from a typical male perspective, let's say... Charlie Harper

She's cute/hot.
She gave you her number.

So that's some great foundations to start of some kind of relationship, wether it be friends or more intimate.

Dude, take a chance. After all you've done, you seem like you deserve a nice woman

Just my take though

Greetings John Paul.

You asked our opinions, but what do you think? It's a shame we live in a world where we must be guarded and second guess everyone.

My personal opinion on the matter:

1. She genuinely likes you

2. She works for the CIA

3. Ulterior Motives, i.e., use you for money, services, help, etc.

I don't "think" she's out to rob or kill you, unless she's doing recon work for some of her robber friends :p Worst case scenario is just looking for some guy to leap to her every whim. Best case scenario, you'll get a new friend or partner. Hard to tell about people nowa days

Call the girl and talk to her. clearly she is interested and a little bit nutty but hey you only live once. odds are she is just looking for some attention, she may not even want a relationship, it isn't like she stripped down naked in front of you. Maybe shes just lonely and wants someone to talk to. I'd keep 911 on the speed dial for a bit and maybe lock your doors for awhile, but it doesn't hurt to talk to someone.

ET, this chick sounds pretty creepy to me mate.

If she was interested in you, don't ya think she may have picked a better time to initiate contact then after midnight with a knock on the door? Like in the day when your in the yard or something of that nature, walking the dog perhaps?

Just seems like lots of warning signs in these encounters with her. If ya do decide to pursue something with her, tread lightly mate. You seem like a nice enough person, I'd hate to see something bad happen to ya.

Esoteric Teacher:

It doesn't sound like she's going anywhere for awhile; you might as well get to know her. Why not try to look beyond her sex appeal and just befriend her over a cup of coffee. Sure be smart. Obviously, you don't want to let your guard down completely. Disarm her through casual conversation: you want to know about her. She will probably want to talk about herself. You simply have to listen.

It shouldn't take some time to figure out whether she is insane or just a bit eccentric. Maybe she running away from a crazy ex-boyfriend in Britain. Maybe she is trying to charm your pants off to get a Green Card. Maybe she wants to sleep with you. Maybe your military stickers made her think of her father or an uncle she admired.

The point is that if you just talk with her long enough--let her talk--you listen--she will let you know what she is really looking for. Try to keep the sexual vibe to the minimum until you figure out what the hell it is she wants. Then you can't make some intelligent decisions. Right now, there isn't enough information to make a snap decision. It requires a bit more reconnaissance first.

Keep us posted. It's an interesting sequence of events so far! Good luck!

reply to post by Esoteric Teacher


First, why is she shopping at such a late hour? Who does that? If there is a valid reason, then I'd chalk it up to a cultural difference. There are rural areas in England (so I've heard) that are very much like this....everyone leaves their doors unlocked, and neighbors (if they feel they know you well enough) will walk in or at least open the door, rather than knock. Well, for that matter, there are rural places in the U.S. like that as well. I wouldn't let it alarm you too much, as Americans are culturally very guarded with strict taboos against those they don't know well. Waltzing into someone's home, especially a stranger's, is a big no-no.

If it were me, I'd do two things....one, start locking your door (just because). Two, get to know her better and go visit HER place. See how she likes it turned around, and observe her reaction. Is she just using you for a ride?

My gut feeling with you...considering your age and inexperience with long-termed commitments with women (no offense, your life is what it is), you might be looking for the flaws because you fear going down that road. It's a natural knee-jerk subconscious reaction. If your training and experience doesn't leave you feeling uneasy about her intentions, then just go with it! If your destiny is to be with her, destiny will plop her on your doorstep if you're not out there actively searching for her! I say go for it....don't question it. Everything happens for a reason!

Well, three scenarios:

1. Honest girl, really taking a liking too you. But the showing up and asking once again for you to call her is a red flag. A big red flag. Trust me, I am 17, and the beautiful ones are the craziest in some cases. To much conditioning goes on in some peoples heads when it comes to relationships, and this can lead to unfulfilled expectations, resulting in a big pile of worthless time and money.

2. Scam. Nothing screams scam more than a beautiful girl taking advantage of a kind hearted guy. Just look at the back of your car, your the perfect target. Scams can get very complex, and most often involves counterfeited money, or even jewelery. Watch out boyiee.

3. Crazy. Flat out crazy person wanting a single guy with a house. And yes, on the upside this could mean "crazy in love" but as we all should know, the more love in a relationship, the more hate.

Luckily, she lives down the street, so no scam could happen, downside is that if she is crazy, you now have a crazy ex girlfriend neighbor who will, 9/10 chances, end up stalking you and watching you as you drive in your drive way to see if you have another girl.

I have only experienced 2. Well, if flat out being used is being scammed, then yep.

Peace and Love, but not to the extreme,

Gandhi.

reply to post by Esoteric Teacher


If you enter into this "waiting" for the bad to happen, then it will. Befriend her first....you will lose nothing by getting to know her, and will likely gain a great friend in the process! The only person I became best friends with first before dating, ended up becoming my spouse....18 years later, we're still best friends. If it's meant to be, then you'll know it, and you won't seek advice from the likes of us! Don't be afraid to be honest with her. Tell her you're not looking to date anyone right now, but you are interested in making friends and getting to know the neighbors. Nothing is more intriguing to a woman than a man who doesn't appear to want her! LOL! She will open up and be herself around you if you do. I would not, however, be flippant about entering into a casual relationship with her....she is, after all, your neighbor. And as we like to say, don't crap where you live!

reply to post by Esoteric Teacher


People in the country do things differently. They aren't living under the usual fears of city or suburban dwellers in most cases. I've known many people who once they meet you, then treat you like friend and family.. the make yourself at home kind of people. So they behave that way normally, well, many do.

But, this girl is also a relative newcomer to the district.

The story of not liking to walk in the dark seems inconsistent in that she seemed happy enough to walk to your house a long way in the dark to begin with. Maybe seeing your lights on this young girl decided to play helpless so you would assist her? It's no uncommon for teens and adults to to often use people for their own means and appear in need at the time.

If anything I would suggest keeping this one at arms length until you are able to gain a clearer picture of her. Then you will know better how to deal with her effectively. I sure wouldn't be putting myself out for her unless it was a real emergency... and certainly not to take her to the club district in town.

I would also lay down some ground rules, House Rules. Always knock and wait for a reply.. no matter if you have to knock a few times... and only then enter the house. While she must be harmless.. your dog didn't defend the house against her entry... it pays to have House Rules in effect.

I have read through all the responses, regretfully I don't have the time to respond to each one right now. I will take into account the suggestions, and I appreciate wholeheartedly the amount of responses this topic has received. Thank you fellow ATS members, and friends, who have taken the time to read this and offer their personal insights. I appreciated the input greatly.

I have not seen or called her, yet. I don't know if I will text her or call her before seeing her again. Chances are I may be able to see which house she lives in from a ridgeline that is on my property, since the leaves are changing and falling visibility is better. I will continue to walk my dog in the evenings and occassionally walk down that way with him, there are 6 routes we usually walk down, four country roads, two different ways on a bike path/nature trail. We usually change it up, but for the most part I let Fido choose which way we are going, it's his walk afterall.

Again, fellow ATSers, thank you all for providing your opinions, they are appreciated.

I will continue to read the contributions in this thread and will respond to the posts made in the future. If things change, whether we end up being friends, I get to know her better, I will surely keep you guys appraised of what is going on. But, I'm not the type to kiss and tell, and if (big if) .... if we become an item, I must keep in mind she could (theoretically) end up reading this thread at some point in time

What is going to happen? I don't know. Maybe I have some fruitloop with spunk living down the road, maybe I just have an odd eccentric girl living down the way who for some reason thinks it is acceptable to impose on others at odd hours of the night.

Next time I have any interaction with her at all, I'll let you guys know.

thanks,
ET

I don't know why, but the first thought that came into my head when reading the OP was MI5. Maybe I'm just paranoid.