Why do people blame everyone else for their failures?

Originally posted by BoneyMaroney
I had a friend of mine laugh as he told me how his wife did a shot of whiskey with their 16 year old son. It took everything I had not to smack some sense into him.

Wow... I've heard people argue that it's better they do it at home than out with friends, but I think that argument is rubbish. Parents shouldn't give their children alcohol. It can mess up their brain development, literally.

By the way, you sound like a great mother. My kids always tell me I am not nice when they don't get their way, and I always tell them that I must be doing a good job then.

Thank you. I get told "Mommy, that's not very nice" and respond with "I am being nice and someday you'll realize that." I get blank looks now, but eventually they'll realize every time Mommy said no there was a reason for it and I'm not just being mean for the heck of it.

Originally posted by Jean Paul Zodeaux
reply to post by BoneyMaroney

 

You know what? I am actually very busy and have a lot of work to do! Lately I've been able to get much of that work done because there just hasn't been much interesting going on in this site...at least to me, but these past few days have been cracking and sizzling and popping with all sorts of compelling issues. How am I supposed to get any work done when people keep creating all these cool threads? Sheesh! So, there I was working away and finally getting something accomplished and then you had to start this thread, and now look what you've done! I hope your happy. If I miss my deadline this will be your fault.

very good!

My retort is far to cumbersome and it would have to be fashioned out of the timber of my mortal nemesis, so I cannot...

good is good right?

reply to post by YehudasTheEnabler


Yes I agree it's the 1990s generation of parent that is to blame for not just not taking responsibility for their actions, but also not being thought right from wrong. It would appear that this generation of parent want to be their children's friend instead of their parent, thus the child grows up with no parental figure which leads to the anti-social behaviour hat has become so common place all around us.

If only everyone would take an existential viewpoint. Not only do people not take responsibility and blame others, but a lot of the time I see people blaming inanimate objects for their miseries in life.

Originally posted by 12GaugePermissionSlip
reply to post by BoneyMaroney

 

You don't need government to protect you or your children from the mundane.

You need them to protect you from criminals, mentally insane people, sociopaths, corporate rape, drunk drivers, thieves, factory pollution, etc. Or do you think you can handle all that by yourself?

There's nothing mundane about any of that. I took the word 'mundane' to mean every day decisions that we have to make for ourselves that some would like to see the government take charge of. Things like whether to buy a Happy Meal or make dinner at home, whether to waste money on that new toy we want or spend it on something we actually need, whether we should eat that bag of chips or pull out some apples.

Originally posted by dPD89
reply to post by YehudasTheEnabler

 

Yes I agree it's the 1990s generation of parent that is to blame for not just not taking responsibility for their actions, but also not being thought right from wrong. It would appear that this generation of parent want to be their children's friend instead of their parent, thus the child grows up with no parental figure which leads to the anti-social behaviour hat has become so common place all around us.

If only everyone would take an existential viewpoint. Not only do people not take responsibility and blame others, but a lot of the time I see people blaming inanimate objects for their miseries in life.

No quite the opposite infact,people were not having children because they wanted them,they were having children for the "need",by the pressure that was put on them socially,to fit in,to be normal.

This ofcourse is all my own opinion.

Treat others how You wish to be treated.

What really makes me laugh is how it seems that 99% of people that comment on this subject agree wholeheartedly that personal responsibility has gone out the window, and say that it is a problem. Yet somehow, massive amounts of people are still doing nothing to change that. Seems to me that there are plenty o hypocrites out there (I'm not talking about any of you, just looking at society as a whole).

People popping out kids nonstop who can't afford them and complaining if the government doesn't give them the money...people who spill coffee on their pants because they were driving and blame McDonalds because "it was too hot"...heck in the local news here last year there was a woman sueing a salon because they did a color treatment on her hair, and some of her hair started falling out...come to find out she had been getting her hair bleached, permed, colored, whatever chemical you can throw at it put on there, constantly for years and years. But I suppose it was that one salons fault that her hair was so worn from all those treatments that it just fell out

The last two examples are relatively minor, but they are just small examples of what our society is turning into. People who want everything from cars to houses, to porn start bodies and hollywood hairstyles, to greasy fatty food. But they don't just want it, they take it and then some, and EXPECT IT ALL with zero consequences.

A mix of greediness and an inability to understand simple action vs consequence...it's quite pathetic really.

hey man I agree with a lot of what you said about personal responsibility.
life has many variables. Some things effect people in different ways. We are the sum of our experiences. Parents deny their children experiences, mainly unpleasant ones, that need to be learned.

That said, the profit driven world we live in I think is evil. Not consciously designed to be evil by some grand arch villain but evil in the shallow and vapid culture of consumption it promotes.

The lesson I was taught as a child was work hard and take your licks, jump through the hoops, so you can earn money to feed yourself and buy all kinds of stuff to distract you.

My generation is spoiled. I was spoiled. And now I see the value in hard work but not the value in giving my effort and years of my life to someone elses paycheck, so I can afford that latest new thing.

This is the addiction people get. To consumption. Addicts dont make rational life choices. Thats why the family unit is in shambles, people run up debt, banks fail and get bailed out. Its all part and parcel of the world we live in. We all have responsibility to the mess of mommy-daddy governance and mindless consumption. Corporations and society itself are all about the self. the ego.

When I was really young, I could remember neighbours sitting on their porches talking or sharing a beer or a glass of wine. Now the
neighbourhood I live in, my neighbour's don't even have porches.

Just two cents from an 80's baby.
Cheers

[edit on 27-4-2010 by thebulldog]

[edit on 27-4-2010 by thebulldog]

[edit on 27-4-2010 by thebulldog]

I don't blame EVEYRONE else for my failures...generally just one or two people...maybe three if it is really bad.

But to be serious for a minute...why do they do this??? Because it's easier than the alternative.

reply to post by Cantthinkofaname


Nah, there's just plenty of people out there who think the government needs to step in and make all their decisions for them and that everything is someone else's fault.

"It's not my fault my cholesterol is up, I blame McDonald's!"
"It's not my fault my child developed diabetes, I blame candy!"
"It's not my fault I totaled my car, I blame alcohol!"
"It's not my fault I got caught robbing a bank, if I were paid more for flipping burgers I wouldn't have had to do it. I blame my boss for not giving me that raise!"

It may appear to be hypocrisy because you can't really see a change at the moment. I'm hoping that when my children are adults it will be easier to see a change from how things are now. I know I'm not the only one teaching my offspring personal responsibility, I just hope there are enough of us doing so that it reverses this trend of blaming everyone else instead of ourselves when things go wrong.

I can lay a little blame elsewhere- but usually when something has gone completely from any control I could have had on it- sometimes by a stupid idiot (or 2), sometimes, by forces I simply cannot comprehend- like the mysterious people who have so far 'lost' results to tests, applications to colleges are 'lost', other life altering for good changes simply and totally evaporate, leaving me holding an empty sack and asking "what th-?!". What's real fun is trying to find out when it all went down for the count. *grumble*


When you've dotted every i and crossed every t, and someone down the line who simply doesn't like you or is a complete and utter moron- and not only that, is faceless, nameless, and basically untouchable... Or people who are absolutely hell bent on making your life a mess, even when ya walk away from them... THOSE are the ones who can get a lil blame.