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"You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind."
This sounds fantastic -- after all, when the rapture comes, there is probably going to be a lot of things on your mind. Really, what does one even pack? So it's nice to get arrangements for your pets, who apparently will spent eternity with the atheists and gays and gay atheists, all sorted out before hand.
If subscriber loses his/her faith and/or the Rapture occurs and subscriber is not Raptured (aka is "left behind") EE-BP disclaims any liability; no refund will be tendered.