SubGenius UFO Cult Gathers In New York For Apocalypse

SubGenius UFO Cult Gathers In New York For Apocalypse

www.pitchengine.com

The Church of the SubGenius has announced that the end of the world will take place in just over one month, on Sunday, July 5, 2009. In preparation for the fulfillment of this doomsday prophecy, the Church has issued a call to all of its members, to participate in a festival with rock concerts and blasphemous rituals taking place in upstate New York, during the final weekend before the arrival of the apocalypse.

The Church of the SubGenius is a popular organization often seen as a "parody" of religious cults, including Scientology, the Raelians, the Unification Church, and racist hate gro

(visit the link for the full news article)

What the heck...

Never heard of them.. A "parody" of religious cults..
I love the way scientology is listed too....

Can you imagine the possible implications of this upcoming event.. If they are right then we're all stuffed..
If they're wrong then it's anyones guess as to what will happen to this bunch..

Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by escape vessels piloted by the Alien Sex Goddesses, also known as the Xists.

WHAT!!!!! are you serious?

Luckily, they have very thoughtfully provided a load of links in this report to show they are doing 'research', are 'informed' and trying to keep everyone at 'peace'... even by sending a peace virus out onto computers..which they deny doing..

Where is the world going? Anyone got any ideas, 'cos I'm feeling a bit lost..

lol

www.pitchengine.com
(visit the link for the full news article)

lol, its not taken seriously by many members, and at the end there is a guy who gives a rediculous reason why it didnt happen. its a yearly event.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by MR BOB]

Originally posted by Extralien
Where is the world going? Anyone got any ideas, 'cos I'm feeling a bit lost..

It's ok, folks...Bob Dobbs has it all well in hand...

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/c7c33f42004d.jpg[/atsimg]

Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by escape vessels piloted by the Alien Sex Goddesses, also known as the Xists.

Absolute comic genius! Where do I sign up!!!!!

"Alien Sex Goddesses" - priceless!

Too weird not to be real. I love it. The alien sex goddesses have to be the best part. Talk about some sort of pent up sexual frustration. I hope they are at least hawt!

Obs

[edit on 22-5-2009 by observer]

They get a mention on this site disbeliefnet.com... along with quite a few other religions.

I can't visit the disbeliefnet website from my local library because it is web-sensed under 'bad taste'!

For those not familiar with the Church of the Subgenius:
Subgenius

reply to post by observer


Oh god! It's like the 72 virgins being a bunch of D&D fanboys!

I just hope the FEDS are all over this, this time around and there is not another huge mass suicide.....will make conspiracy people look even more nuts than we already are perceived to be.

-Kdial1

Now this is a very strange coincidence. Two nights ago I took pictures of what appeared to the naked eye as a red star. Upon uploading and enlarging the pictures I found that it was not one object but appears to be a ball of fire accompanied by three spheres. Two large spheres and one small sphere. One of the large spheres is bright red the other two are gray. Also there is a nondescript object there as well. My friend seems to think it is Nibiru; however, I do not share his belief. Now I read this thread and it makes me wonder if he is right.

I made a thread for this yesterday and posted the pictures there. Take a look and tell me what you think.

Link to thread

reply to post by kdial1


For you and anyone else who is ignorant of the Church of the Subgenius, here is the wikipedia entry on them.
en.wikipedia.org...

There will be no mass suicides, no apocalypse, nothing except some people having a lot of fun.

By the way, the place where this is held, Brushwood, is awesome. You can go naked and not get tazed, and they make some kick-butt bonfires there.

Message to Anonymous from the Church of the SubGenius

Transcript:

Hello, legions of Anonymous. We are the Church of the SubGenius.

Over the years, we have been watching you. We were there when you were born amid the festering pits of 4chan, eBaum's World, and Something Awful. We were there when you took down Hal Turner. We were there when you became a force to be reckoned with. We were there when you declared war on the Church of Scientology. With the introduction and acceptance of Anonymous into mainstream media, your actions to expose the world to abnormality, anti-censorship, individuality, rebellion, dissent, and outright pornography have come to our attention. The Church of the SubGenius has therefore decided to issue the following invitation to Anonymous:

X-DAY IS COMING.

The Church of the SubGenius extends an invitation for Anonymous to gather with us this coming July in New York, to await The Rupture: the arrival at 7 AM, July 5th, of the Escape Vessels of the Alien Sex Goddesses, and the final fulfillment of the prophecy of our founder and leader, J.R. "Bob" Dobbs.

X-Day is an opportunity for members of Anonymous to gather under the auspices of the Church of the SubGenius, pay for their SubGenius ordainments, and thereby benefit from our guarantee of ETERNAL SALVATION OR TRIPLE YOUR MONEY BACK. It is worth noting that the annual X-Day celebration is a wild, adults-only outdoor rock-and-roll party that makes the 4chan /b/ Party Van seem like child's play in comparison.

(It is also worth noting that many SubGenii are already among the ranks of Anonymous. When Anonymous was out in the streets on February 10th and March 15th, we were there among you.)

Anonymous is invited to attend X-Day, in order to gather and take a breather from the Scientology wars in true Anonymous fashion. Attendees at X-Day are encouraged to remain anonymous, not to reveal their "human" names, and to disguise their identities. Random /b/ behavior is encouraged -- as long as participants don't sully the Slack of other celebrants attending the festival.

Because Scientology will undoubtedly make note of this message, we realize there will be attempts by RTC and OSA to infiltrate X-Day in order to dig up "dirt" on Anonymous. We are prepared for this, and we encourage Anonymous to participate in several "Spot The Hidden Scientologist" events that will be planned for the festival. (Please note that live human bonfires are forbidden until AFTER the Xists arrive.)

When "Bob's" prophecy is fulfilled and the true SubGenii depart this world on the Escape Vessels, the chosen legions of Anonymous (or at least the ones who join us on our holy pilgrimage) shall be there with us. But until then, we offer you Slack. We offer you support. And we offer you the opportunity to gather and party with your fellow Anons, in a place far away from so-called "civilization" dominated by the Conspiracy of the Normals.

We are the Church of the SubGenius. We are among you. We are unexpected. # 'em if they can't take a joke. Praise "Bob."

Message by: An Anonymous SubGenius
Video by: MiniTru
Music: "Yacatisma" by Lamprey Systems

Church of the SubGenius: www.subgenius.com...

X-Day: www.modemac.com...

I can feel my third nostril opening already...

Anyone know the cost of membership?

reply to post by Swing Dangler


Thirty dollars. From the wiki:

The Church is incorporated as a profit-making enterprise, and declares itself to be "the only religion that is proud to pay its taxes." Anyone can become an ordained SubGenius minister by paying a fee of $30 US for a lifetime membership. No other requirement is laid upon prospective members, though the cost of ordination separates the Church from the Universal Life Church and other paper churches that offer ordination to all comers. The Church of the SubGenius is known for a standing offer that stems from the ordainment fee: "Eternal Salvation or TRIPLE Your Money Back!" The organization claims that if an ordained SubGenius minister dies and finds himself standing at the gates of "Normal" or "Boring" Hell, he will be personally greeted by Church founder J. R. "Bob" Dobbs Himself and receive a refund check for $90.00, along with a booklet titled, "How to Enjoy Hell for Five Cents an Eternity," which costs $89.95.[7]

It's almost like an entire new society sprang up and wouldn't go away..

An itch that makes you laugh instead of irritate.

A story from inside one of the MAD issues that makes you roll on the floor with laughter when you realise that deep down inside you feel this is how we all really think...

I've got my Pope Card ready!

I haven't heard anything about COTSG in quite sometime, I've been out of the loop (and out of that drug-induced haze) for about a decade now.

Fnord!

I am very suprised that more people on this site have not heard of the Church of the Sub-genius. I have heard of it but I am not a member. I do however have a few close firends that are members and celebrate X day. But this X-day fest has been an yearly thing since 1995 I think. In JR " Bob " Dobbs' prophecy the aliens were gonna come on july 5 1995. They didnt show so they have this fest every year thinking that they ( aliens ) were late or Dobbs got the year wrong.

Originally posted by Extralien

Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by escape vessels piloted by the Alien Sex Goddesses, also known as the Xists.

WHAT!!!!! are you serious?

OMG!! And I thought I was MENTAL cos I'm a Believer