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123: Television is one of the keys to a white person’s heart. A proper reference to Arrested Development or the lending of a Wire Season on DVD are considered two of the easiest and most cost effective ways of getting a white person to like you. But with both of those shows off the air, their utility is being quickly depleted. Thankfully, there is Mad Men.
#116 Black Music that Black People Don’t Listen to Anymore
#108 Appearing to enjoy Classical Music
#107 Self Aware Hip Hop References
This distaste caused a dilemma for white people who had to show both that they loved hip hop but also that they were aware they were white. The brilliant solution they came up with was to appropriate hip hop words and mannerisms and filter them through a white appropriateness system.
For example, white people find it particularly hilarious to take slang and enunciate every word perfectly.
“Homey, that bernaise sauce you made is wack. Do you know what I am saying? For Real.”
“Well, I used a different type of butter. I switched the style up, so let the haters hate and I’ll watch the deliciousness pile up.”
Since the above exchange involves people who are very aware of their whiteness it is hilarious, but if it were to be said by wiggers, it would be tragic. The difference is subtle but essential.
80s Nite: If you ever find yourself wanting to take your relationship with white people to the next level, one of the best places to meet a potential partner is at any 80s night event in your local city.
White people cannot get enough of 80s music, partially out of nostalgia, and partially since it was the last time that pop music wasn’t infused with hip-hop or R n’ B stylings. Artists like Joy Division, New Order and Elvis Costello were all pretty well respected and had solid runs at the charts. Also, less respected artists like Wham, Rick Astley and Cameo are still easy for white people to dance to.
If you are in a social situation and wish to turn into one more condusive for romance, you should always ask “does anyone know a club with a good 80s night?” at which point the entire group of white people are likely to invite you to an event.
#2 Religions that their parents don’t belong to
White people will often say they are “spiritual” but not religious. Which usually means that they will believe any religion that doesn’t involve Jesus.
Popular choices include Buddhism, Hinduism, Kabbalah and, to a lesser extent, Scientology. A few even dip into Islam, but it’s much more rare since you have to give stuff up and actually go to Mosque.
Mostly they are into religion that fits really well into their homes or wardrobe and doesn’t require them to do very much.
#7 Diversity
White people love ethnic diversity, but only as it relates to restaurants.
Originally posted by whaaa
Oh yeah, I'm a white people and especially fond of glazed donuts and pie.
Originally posted by riley
Originally posted by whaaa
Oh yeah, I'm a white people and especially fond of glazed donuts and pie.
nope.. thats just americans.
Originally posted by LoneGunMan
Flirting with world class beautiful women
Not being like anyone else