Sexsomnia or sleep sex; Sleeping disorder, page 2

reply to post by greeneyedleo

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No, I don't take any medications. I haven't been on any for 20 yrs.

Yes, it's still an issue. My husband doesn't bring it up much anymore. He knows it's a disorder, but I still think it bothers him, but there's not much I can do about it.

I have just recently read that Valium is prescribed to help. Next time I go to the Dr. I'll mention it.

reply to post by americandingbat

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When I used to be an active member on the sleepsex forum, I noticed that a lot of the activity took place where the person fell asleep. It was rare for a person to leave the house, but it does happen.

The ones who don't know they have this can lead to be a very dangerous situation. One man on the forum had left his bedroom while asleep and his daughter had a teenager friend sleeping over. He was extremely upset at what he'd done. He had no idea he'd done, but he found out fast.

As far as raping their bedpartner, sometimes it's more than just rape. There is an aggressiveness involved. Can you imagine being afraid to sleep with your partner and getting raped/bruised, etc. weekly, or more often? This can be a huge problem.

It took me 20 yrs to be diagnosed, but I would bet most folks who have this are never diagnosed with it.



[edit on 19-11-2008 by virraszto]

reply to post by virraszto

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Rereading my post, I see I wasn't very clear.

What I wanted to say was that I think that having this disorder become more widely known may prevent actual assaults or rapes by making it easier for people to get the diagnosis and to accept the diagnosis.

That benefit of publicity will outweigh the possible downside of having people try to claim it as a mitigating factor in criminal cases. For one thing, I think it would be incredibly rare for such a case to involve someone outside the house and the burden of proving the disability was a factor in a case like that could be set extremely high.

I'm sure the most common occurrence is the rape of a bedpartner, and I didn't mean to imply that that wouldn't be terrible and traumatic, just that it would be unlikely to be prosecuted in criminal court if both parties were aware of the diagnosis.

I can't imagine being in that situation, and I guarantee that if I fell in love with someone who aggressively attacked me – ever, even if I knew he wasn't aware or accountable – we would not be sharing a bedroom. But I also can't imagine pressing charges in a case like that.

The major concern, I think, would be in cases like the one you relate, where a family friend who is staying over is attacked. And these are exactly the kind of cases that I think are most likely to be prevented by making the diagnosis more widely known.

I hope that's a little more clear

I admire your strength in living with this and your honesty in talking so openly about it.

reply to post by virraszto

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Dear Virraszto,

This is my third attempt at getting in touch with you - so here's hoping.

My name is Jodie and I'm a journalist from Australia. I'm currently researching sleep sex for an article I'm writing, and am very interested in speaking with people who have first hand experience of the disorder. Sexsomnia has recently become a big issue in Australia as we just last year had our first case of a man being acquitted of rape due to the fact that he suffered sleep sex, and was not fully aware when he committed the crime.

I am interested in raising awareness about the disorder - not just to help protect people (women) who are victims of a sleep sex "attack", but to show that those who have the disorder are victims as well, as it affects their relationships in an often negative way.

If you would be interested in having a confidential chat, or if you would like any more information, please get in touch with me through this forum (I can't send a U2U message until I've made 20 posts... but I'm sure you could send me one) or through my blog theconversationchair.wordpress.com...

Thanks,

Jodie

reply to post by dramafreak

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Just like it is practically illegal to defend oneself against street violence right now with this rotten law system in the UK.

OP, please excuse me, I will get to replying to the topic, but 1st I must address this misrepresentation. In fact, UK law allows a person to defend themselves from any illegal violence using "reasonable force". The definition of what is reasonable in any given situation is up to the court of law in which the events subsequently get scrutinised.
In practice this means that if a person attacks you, you may legally kill them if their death results from an injury sustained as a result of an attack by yourself which is commensurate with the level of threat they posed to you.
A 7' brute tries to pummel the bejesus out of you; you stab them; they die: thats legal. The same person threatens but does not actually attack you; you stab them; you're going to jail. Someone attacks you with a knife; you hit them on the head with a bat; thats legal. You carry on beating them when they're down; you're going to jail. Someone you're afraid of breaks into your home; you shoot them; unless there's actual evidence they attacked you; you're going to jail.
Just because the Daily Mail or the Daily Telegraph love to make out like criminals have more rights than anyone else doesn't mean its true. You see, just because somebody is attempting to commit a criminal act, doesn't mean that they have ceased to be a human being & citizen, with the same rights as anyone else. Which, if you think about it, is absolutely correct. Otherwise, anyone could assault whoever they wanted to, doing whatever damage, & simply claim self-defence. People have been lured into situations to be murdered before...

reply to post by virraszto

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This reminds of those people who claim their sleepwalking made them raid the fridge.
Seriously, I think it *is* a disorder of some kind, but I don't buy the current "scientific" explanation.
(Same with the "sex addiction" thing. It's bunkum, a lame excuse for lacking restraint, but the shrinks make a good living out of it.)

If anything, I think this could happen as a result of sleeping pills a la Ambien that are known to produce amnesia. Or that people can fall asleep during sex because of narcolepsy. But that's a whole different story.

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