(Authors note. Whereas it is not required, I would recommend reading “Squirrelfriend” before diving into this tale.)

Wet Dream

So I was asleep in my tent, out at Elf Woods. Life was good. The fish were just starting to fornicate again so there was finally a little work at the factory. Nothing insane, nothing like the madness that summer salmon would soon bring, but enough that I was finally starting to feel the need for sleep.

To make things even groovier, it had warmed up. No longer was I a shivering mass balled up inside my wet sleeping bag. Now I was sprawled out on top of the bloody thing, stark naked and loving it. When you spend all day working in a cold, wet environment, encased from head to toe in a variety of rubber, plastic and leather garments, being warm, dry and naked becomes one of the greater joys in life.

And I was feeling Pretty Good. Stretched out on my back, tent flap open to let the warm breeze flow through, toes airing out after a long day of wet socks… and dreaming.

Oh, the dreams.

Warm, sensual, caressingly delicious, and slowly melting into the erotic. The dreams were deep and real and I let them carry me away. I stretched in my sleep and a new element entered my slumber. Moisture.

Not the cold wet fish slime that was my life, but a warm, firm moisture that had a decided pinkness to it that was most definitely Not a part of my everyday life. Up and down and around my foot, between each toe, slowly, rhythmically, in and out, the firm moisture explored…

The Dream Me slowly began to realize that I really don’t have a foot fetish, and there was nothing particularly erotic about what I was experiencing… in fact, it was rather annoying and was beginning to tickle. So, still half asleep, I did what anybody would do under the same situation; I twitched my foot.

A lot of things happened in rapid succession after that. The first was that the warmth now engulfed my entire foot. Coupled with that there was also a hardness. Rows of hardness. The kind of hardness that really isn’t metal, really isn’t rock, but is more like smooth wet bone. There was also a very loud and very surprised sounding Grunt coming from my foot.

All of that happened more or less at once, and all of that was more than enough to snap me out of the nice sleepy place I had been lounging in. In one fluid motion I yanked my foot back, raking it across rows of highly evolved, highly efficient, incredibly sharp teeth. I also sat bolt upright and thus found myself nose to nose and looking straight into the eyes of one very surprised Grizzly bear.

At the time it did not feel like it, but looking back I can honestly say that there Was a brief moment were we both went ‘Huh?’

However, the moment was brief, and our next reaction was both identical and simultaneous: We screamed.

I’m not sure whose scream was more terrifying, his or mine. His had the affect of causing me to dump about thirty years worth of adrenaline into my system, which turned me into a gibbering worthless idiot that wanted very much to just rip a hole in the back of my tent and go running naked through the woods, yet left me totally incapable of even drooling let alone defending myself.

My scream, on the other hand, had a much more productive result. The bear snorted, yanked its head back, and then crashed its way through the underbrush… probably in search of a salt lick that wouldn’t kick it in the face and then yell at it *shrugs*

Needless to say, I now sleep with my shoes on.



twj

Lovely story, torbjohn...wet dream indeed. Are you citing from experience in this well structured tale, by chance?

It reminds me of one night, when I was 16 and working for the Provincial Department of Forestry here in Canada, as a junior forest ranger. Things were fairly 'barebones' in the camp, far north of civilization, near a place called Chapleau.

The privy (outhouse) was a shack a smart distance from the bunkhouse and, of course, one night...a warm cloudy dark night, I felt the urge to visit that distant facility. Wearing only tighty-whiteys (no girls within 200 miles), I proceeded to stumble my sleepy butt down the well-beaten path when I heard a 'WHUFF' very close to my face.

I looked up from my feet to see the outlines of a large standing brown bear, its nose almost touching mine... it was so close.

I went "AAAAAH" and it went "BWUAAW" and we both turned and ran as fast as we could away from each other.

From then on I always made sure to make that trip before turning in.
.

MASQUA:

yep, very much a real experience... life's weird enough as it is, no point going around and making up more of it, ya know?

Nothing puts things more into perspective than that Very Distinctive Whuff from a bear... *shudders*

as an aside, I really don't give a rats tail what folks call me (unlike some folks who Can be a little picky about their names) but just FYI my name really is Torbjön... things are getting better these days, but way back when most computers just couldn't handle the oomlot so I gave up on it *shrugs*

anyway, if yer curious, it's pronounced Tor-Byorn, or Torb for short *shrugs* but like I say, call me anything ya want, I'm not at all sensitive about it


thanks fer the feed back...
and remember, don't feed the bears *grins*

rock on
twj

oops...sorry torbjon...must read more carefully.

People call me masque all the time too...it has a feminine connotation and makes me shudder a bit when I see it, but I don't bother worrying over it anymore.

Thanks for correcting me, though...I might have gone on that way for weeks.

Another little true to life bear story for this thread...

Once, a group of about 20 young fellows and myself were heading to a lumber camp far down a horrible narrow logging road riding on the back of a 5 ton stake truck. The trees on either side were thick with jackpine.
Just prior to getting to the camp, we could see a young brown bear hustling along in front of the growling old ford truck, trying to find a spot it could squeeze through to get off the road.

It did, eventually, and shortly afterward, we turned into the campsite. Offloading our gear and stowing into the already set up Bell tents, some-one wondered aloud if that bear was still out on the road. So, of course, all 21 of us decided to have a look.

Well, the young bear was there and immediately started walking away from us. We brave souls, emboldened by our numbers, walked after it and then the bear started to trot. With lots of laughing and shouting, we sped up too. Now the bear was running full tilt down the dirt track and we were in full pursuit, howling like a bunch of fools.

And then the bear stopped. And so did we. And then the bear started toward us...HORRORS...we turned tail and scrambled as fast as we could, screaming in fear.

That young brown chased us right back into camp and into our tents.

I'll never forget the lesson we all learned that day.

*laughs*

that'll learn ya, he hee heee

as an aside, this has Got to be the best thread I ever wrote... in the first half hour it was up it got over 60 hits... spooky.

All bear stories welcome, btw...

bare stories are fine by me too, but keep it within the T&C *nudge nudge*

rock on
twj

Originally posted by torbjon
as an aside, this has Got to be the best thread I ever wrote... in the first half hour it was up it got over 60 hits... spooky.

Personally, I think it was the provocative title which produced the spike of hits. I'm sure more than a few punched it up wondering "what the heck?"

I was a bit taken aback when I read the title myself.

I was also wondering where it was going by the time I read the paragraph starting with: "Not the cold wet fish slime that was my life...", but, you managed to surprise the reader, causing them to 'wake up from a dream' much like the character in your story, when you introduced the warm wet tongue of the black bear. (or was it a grizzly?)


Seriously, though, the story is excellent and had me thinking of all my bear
encounters (as well as others I've heard of). It's a truly memorable experience when nature's food chain is up front and personal...like when you see a pack of wolves pass by on the run.

You have fine descriptive abilities, torbjon...keep up the good effort, but, like you say, work within the T&C's.
.

*laughs*

ya, a good title is half the battle, huh? Still... I have to wonder what they were looking for and why... after all, it's Not that kind of a site, ya know? I find the whole 'porn' versus 'art' thing to be a rather interesting subject... mostly I think it boils down to placement. I've seen some imagry in churches in Europe that would put Husltler magazine to shame, and I've seen photographs in Playboy that belong in a museum... hmmm... (idea brewing)

---

we had black and brown bears on the island... black bears would get up to 350 pounds or so, brown bears could hit twice that... This one happend to be the brown variety.

We never called anything a 'Grizzly'... tourists did, but to us it was just 'black' or 'brown' *shrugs*

I used 'grizzly' in the story because I think that's what everybody else in the world would have called it....

rock on
twj

Originally posted by torbjon

ya, a good title is half the battle, huh? Still... I have to wonder what they were looking for and why... after all, it's Not that kind of a site, ya know?

I think there should be a certain amount of latitude in writing...after all, we're talking about the human experience in all its variety when we try to paint pictures with words. But, we do have to temper what we compose with the understanding that teens, even pre-teens, will be reading our descriptive creations.

I've a tendency to the macabre, myself and that can be construed as pornograpfic in itself. What I do is write as if my kids will read it...and they do.

Having a great title does draw people in, though...

Browns and blacks are the common way to distinquish bears...but there is a real difference in how the react to people. A black bear is shy compared to browns. Did you know there is a species of white bear on Vancouver Island and the west coast of Canada. I've heard them called 'Ghost Bears'. They're browns, but have white fur much like a polar bear.
.

(Waaaaay off topic, but something Masqua said sparked this rant…)

Save the Children Rant.

This particular subject is a Very Touchy one for me. I’ll probably use the word ‘you’ a lot… know that I am Not targeting any specific individual, but rather am using that word to denote Society as a whole.

Save the children, protect the children, shelter the children, shield the children…

Just exactly WHEN did it become MY responsibility to protect YOUR children? And just when, Exactly, did you decide to take on the burden of responsibility to protect MY child?

Just exactly What are you protecting MY child from, and WHY?

What makes Your judgment Better than Mine? And what makes MY judgment better than YOURS?

Just exactly How Far does your responsibility go? Are you going to pay my kids doctor bills? Or are you simply going to deny her access to certain concepts that You find offensive?

Just exactly When will my daughter be ‘allowed’ to look at a dictionary?

A thesaurus?

An encyclopedia?

When can she watch the news or read a newspaper?

When can she go into a museum? An art gallery? A Cathedral?

Why Then and not before or after?

Who is better equipped to make these determinations; You or Me?

If people are going to allow their children to participate in activities UNSUPERVISED that is their choice. Be Responsible and Face The Consequences of YOUR ACTIONS.

I am NOT going to baby sit Your brat for you. And I sure as ‘ell don’t want You baby sitting Mine.

I take My responsibilities as a parent VERY SERIOUSLY. If other people don’t want to take their responsibilities seriously, Fine. I don’t care.

But don’t even THINK of getting ticked off at ME when I teach Your kid the F word.

Where Were You When YOUR Child NEEDED You??

Responsible people govern themselves.

I don’t need or want you to tell me what is ‘right’ and what is ‘wrong’ anymore than you want ME telling you (or your kids) what is ‘right’ and ‘wrong’.

Having ranted alla that, yes, abusive situations are a bad scene for everybody. However, there’s a big difference between an abusive environment and a graphic image, (or the F word, or a political or spiritual philosophy, etc.)

When you ‘save’ somebody, you are ‘saving’ them for LIFE. You are ‘saving’ them FOREVER. Which means your responsibility to that person is now Forever.

For-Ev-Er.

Few people are truly willing to take on that type of responsibility….

*ponders*

Do you get the impression that I am anti-censorship? *laughs* ya…

Why does the censor get to watch that movie, read that book, look at that picture, but I can’t???

Why does the censor get to tell me that This political or spiritual philosophy is O.K. for me to study, but That political or spiritual philosophy is not??

What makes the censor so bloody wise and clever and the rest of us just a bunch of stupid dunderheads?

bah.

*laughs*

Probably didn’t think you were gonna open up THAT can of worms, now didja, Masqua? *grins*

I’ve always been responsible for myself and my actions. I’ve been supporting myself since I was 15 years old.

I’ve been taking care of my daughter since she was born (my wife is the bread winner in this family)

When anybody implies that my daughter needs protection from the big bad boogieman that is the World, they are also implying that I am not doing my job or taking my responsibilities seriously.

Needless to say, that offends the ‘ell out of me… I think it would offend Any good parent…

hmmm….

speaking of which….

duty calls.
twj

Originally posted by torbjon
(Waaaaay off topic, but something Masqua said sparked this rant…)

Save the Children Rant.

This particular subject is a Very Touchy one for me. I’ll probably use the word ‘you’ a lot… know that I am Not targeting any specific individual, but rather am using that word to denote Society as a whole.

Save the children, protect the children, shelter the children, shield the children…

Just exactly WHEN did it become MY responsibility to protect YOUR children? And just when, Exactly, did you decide to take on the burden of responsibility to protect MY child?

While appreciating the fact that you're not responding to me personally, but, as you say, society as a whole, it must be remembered that you are using ATS as the medium for posting material...and that they will be held responsible for the content.

So, it's not really what I, as a mod, think is allowable...but that of the board 'vision' the administrators have outlined in the T&C's.

Having raised two sons (now 32 and 35), I believe I have some idea of what would be a reasonable topic for a pre-teen or older. I now have a new daughter-in-law and another one in the works...the content of conversation with them is refined by me, in some manner, mainly because I have only a rough idea how they were raised. For that reason, I studiously avoid some subjects. And these are adults- not children.

Anyways, interesting rant, torbjon...

*laughs*

I got NO problems with the T&Cs of ATS... I totally understand the Why behind them. I've never had to bite my tongue here, never had a post edited for content.. this is one of the few internet communities I've found where I can actually be Me *dreamy*

nice place.

But you made an interesting statement that I feel is indicative of society as a whole, which was:

"Having raised two sons (now 32 and 35), I believe I have some idea of what would be a reasonable topic for a pre-teen or older."

Honestly??

Now then, I have No Doubts whatsoever that you have a good idea as to what would be a reasonable topic of discussion for YOUR family... in fact, I believe that you and your spouse are probably the only people on the face of the entire planet capable of making that decision... BUT

Are you Honestly going to tell Me that it IS cool to fill my kids head full of Santa Clause and Easter Bunny? (or Any subject whatsoever, doesn't matter... pick a subject)

My kid is Not your kid. (and vise versa, of course)

Again, ATS T&C totally aside here, you really don't want Me censoring the information that is made available to your family any more than I want you to censor things... or do you?

To me, censorship is the opposite of education... it is embracing ignorance and denying information.

um... you Do know that this is a Purely Philosophical conversation, I think we are both aware of the fact that there's a great big world out there, and nothing is That Simple, yes?

(This really Has been the best thread I've ever started! *laughs* Who woulda thought that my foot in an animals mouth would lead to an interesting conversation about Censorship???)

hmmm...

speaking of kids... somebody is telling me that I need to Stop pounding on the keyboard and Start playing bouncy ball...

soooo

I gotta go
twj

Originally posted by torbjon
I got NO problems with the T&Cs of ATS... I totally understand the Why behind them. I've never had to bite my tongue here, never had a post edited for content.. this is one of the few internet communities I've found where I can actually be Me *dreamy*

nice place.

On this I agree...

by masqua
"Having raised two sons (now 32 and 35), I believe I have some idea of what would be a reasonable topic for a pre-teen or older."

Honestly??

Yes, honestly...I do think so.

I believe that you and your spouse are probably the only people on the face of the entire planet capable of making that decision... BUT

Are you Honestly going to tell Me that it IS cool to fill my kids head full of Santa Clause and Easter Bunny? (or Any subject whatsoever, doesn't matter... pick a subject)

I wouldn't for one second think it my place to fill your kids head with anything...especially the Christian and pagan subjects you mention. No...it wouldn't be cool...especially if it ran counter to the teaching you were yourself providing to your children. That's why, in my previous post, I remarked on the fact that I'm careful in how I approach such subjects with my new daughter-in-law and my other sons' girlfriend. I'd rather let them make statements regarding controversial things first, in order to better understand how their parents raised them.

Again, ATS T&C totally aside here, you really don't want Me censoring the information that is made available to your family any more than I want you to censor things... or do you?

How do you figure that I am or even would want to, since you are involving me by the word 'you'? I have no designs on what your children learn. I can only, at this time and in this place, work within the T&C's...they are my boundaries (as well as every other member) on everything I write here.

What I think of censorship is irrelevant when I post here due to those restrictions, which I have agreed to abide by when I joined.

My birth in Holland and the close ties which remain there, no doubt have influenced my political stance on censorship, and, furthermore, it is an excellent subject for debate...but I don't believe this is the right forum for such debate.

To me, censorship is the opposite of education... it is embracing ignorance and denying information.

Yes, but I'd never leave a 'Hustler' lying on the coffee table when the neighbour's 10 year old is visiting either.

um... you Do know that this is a Purely Philosophical conversation, I think we are both aware of the fact that there's a great big world out there, and nothing is That Simple, yes?

At my age, I think I'm beginning to understand that I'm just beginning to scratch the surface of what life means...seriously. If you were to look at what I'm studying these days, it would be obvious to you that I'm one of those people who are always surprised at the complexity of the human experience. The short 3,500 years of current history is difficult enough to grasp, let alone the whole of our (Homo Sapiens) ~190,000 years on this earth. To truly understand people, you would have to know how they became moderm humans...and 98% of our history is a blank.
.

hey comrade, I'm just chatting... If I struck a bad chord or rubbed you the wrong way I am Really Sorry about that... that was NOT my intention at all... I just really enjoy conversing with you... this is a passionate subject for me....

I'm Not trying to change anybodies mind, (especially yours, see below) or say 'my view is right, your view is wrong' or any of that stuff...

nor am I going off on the T&C of ATS... I TOTALLY understand the politics, legalities and philosophy of the T&C here... I understand the need for them and whereas I don't bend over backwards and bite my tongue TRYING to abide them, I seem to abide by them naturally... which is one of the reasons why I like here it so much (that, and because people like You are here)

Mostly, I just read something that set off a flame in me, it IS a passionate subject for me, and basically I just turned off my brain and let my fingers do the walking.... (which I tend to do a lot here, just dump Me, the Real Me, onto the board... and so far I've been accepted here *dreamy* Can you imagine how gratifying that is??...)

I precieve you as being a very responsible person, Masqua, and I value that greatly. As I said earlier, Responsible People Govern Themselves.... and I see you doing that, and that just helps me respect you even more.

Again, I'm NOT going off about the T&C here at ATS... if anybody ever got that idea from my rants then I've failed miserably as a communicator, which is my fault and my fault alone.... I'm sorry if that was the case.

Censorship is one of those topics like politics and religion... ie one of those subjects I tend to avoid like the plague *laughs* Basically because when it comes to these types of subjecs, EVERYBODY is Right, ya know? Everybody has their reasons for believing in those sorts of things, and their reasons are right,,, For Them.

but you're right... this conversation doesn't really belong here, huh? We're a long way from the foot in the mouth story that started this thread... that too was my fault and I'm sorry 'bout that...

I also didn't mean to attack you personally. I cannot emphasize enough how sorry I am about that.

*sighs*

Basically I'm feeling like a class 'A' idiot right now, so I'm just gonna end this by saying Thank You for being so patient with me and I hope I don't make a habit of testing your patience with me in the future 'cause I think you're pretty cool.


okay

rock on
twj