What you find though, is people in strong relationships saying "Oh no! It's wrong! It's infidelity 100%" because they can not fathom the
heartbreak it would cause to them to learn their lover had done something like that behind their back and betrayed them...nor could they imagine ever
needing someone else or doing that to the one they love...likely in a good relationship it isn't going to happen...but still perish the thought!
This is security born prejudice against Internet "affairs"
Then you have those weak of resolve/relationships...either they are afraid of the temptation to themselves or to their partner because perhaps things
are not ideal, or they are insecure in general or in the relationship...so then again...it's "oh the horror! That would be the worst-that is
'cheating!' " etc ...they would NEVER do that to anyone and hope to God it wouldn't happen to them...that their lover would seek something/someone
else somewhere else...oh no...no...
This is insecurity born prejudice against such Internet "affairs"
Then you have me...
But I just blame it all on Timing, Destiny, and the Canadian Factor
Now, seriously, judge me if you must, but until you've slept in my underwear...
Now, while I would not have an affair in the flesh, I have had one online last year. My marital situation is not ideal to say the least and though I
wasn't looking AT ALL...it found me so to speak. A lover from the past...someone with whom I had had a *connection* with once in my life...albeit for
one night-but it made an impact on us....and now we were in contact via the Internet again....and things just escalated.
I am a deeply loving person and very sexual, but I couldn't just look for sex or for romance on the net...just not going to happen, just not going
to fulfill me, ...but sometimes...fate just plays with me.
We have ended our correspondence, and I miss it. It is dangerous-you can get hurt, marriages can be ruined etc...but also it can be fulfilling,
cathartic, and just what you needed...it all depends on from where you are coming from...
As for all Internet secrets-guess I'm still guilty as a few of the opposite sex people know my gender here at ATS and I wouldn't want my spouse
reading our correspondence-guilty-I am highly sexual and can be a flirt-guilty-which is why for the most part I remain as androgenous as I can
here-keeps the temptation low.
However I flirt-or did-innocently with one. Absolutely no intention beyond flirting and mock sexual harrassment about how hot they are etc....another
I would never dream of flirting with...but we have good off the board talks...NO INTIMACY of any type except for the extent of the blatant honesty I
show with this person...and then the other...well that one is kind of fun...kind of hot...but then thats nobody's business...
Just saying...those withought sin cast the first stone...
yes it's infidelity by some definition and some standards, and it's probably good to be seen as such-preserves the value of relationships and
prevents another route of possibly destroying them... but really to me, it's a good thing...it preserves my relationship...gives me something I
need-without having to go outside of my marriage in the flesh...depends on how far you are going to go...I will never go randomly looking for it...I
will never make anything of it...but I do enjoy the fact it has come my way twice to enjoy something in my otherwise disasterous personal life-so
shoot me for having something satisfying in my life-when my marriage fails me, but I stay to make everyone else happy.
[edit on 7-2-2006 by think2much]