My Pending AOC - Green New Deal approved Insecticde for killing Palmetto Bugs!

Happy Thanksgiving!

On another Thread some other ATS member was giving me sheet for using Mosquito Joe's to treat my yard for insects. Golly, so in 30 years of home ownership I used a pesticide service once for insects and terminated the service after five months. Whatever.

Anyway onto the subject here. I am going to submit the following to the AOC group in Congress for their recognition and approval of my recommended "green" and new method of liquid insect control for the Control and Termination by death of Palmetto Bugs. You know the 3" long trophy size roaches that somehow can get into ones home in the Southern United States. [See Picture Attached] Right Click mouse over pic to enlarge.



One night as we were enjoying our Made in USA Cabernet Sauvignon Red Wine I must have had one too many and headed inside for dinner, obviously forgetting my glass of wine. That being said I left a fresh glass of Cabernet Sauvignon Red Wine on the elevated rear deck porch overnight on a steamy hot night back in July of 2019 in South Carolina just outside of Columbia. I cant speak for Texas but they grown em big down here in the Carolina's.

So the following Saturday morning I head out with a cup of coffee and holy roachee batman as take a look at the picture. Using simple cheap arse "boxed" Cabernet Sauvignon Red Wine as produced by Franzia, we seduced, invited, intoxicated and induced death by drowning; six [6] trophy sized Palmetto Bugs.

Franzia is a brand of wine produced by The Wine Group, known for its box wines sold in 3 and 5-liter cartons. Franzia wines, throughout their history, were known as affordable table wines, popular in the 1960s and 1970s as "jug wine", and now as "box wine".

I mean as a privileged middle age white man and Mrs. who had to work on an employer generated W2 our entire life without those special tax deductions as enjoyed by persons in the restaurant business did you think we can afford high end bottled wine? Hay no. Actually, Franzia, sooks and the boxes are always heavily damaged. I often wonder if the low cost @ $14.99 per 5 liter box is because the sellers source is from train derailments as in that stuff is supposed to be destroyed and not sold.

Anyway back to the Palmetto bugs. When I encountered them they were DOA as in no movement. I hope they enjoyed their last sip of wine as there were so many in the glass no others could have joined them and get in on the fun. That glass was full of them. Yuk. I took a picture for proof as my Southern neighbors are always skeptical of Yankees along with our methods, practices and superstitions.

The bad news is that that same remaining liquid was useless after one night. Meaning those Palmetto Bugs prefer fresh Red Wine and will NOT tolerate one day old red wine that was left over and exposed to the atmosphere. They must be Connoisseurs.

Well that's my true story and since July we no longer drink that nasty stuff and have moved on to Vella as it tastes better. But I will continue to bait Palmetto Bugs outdoors with the Franzia 5 litre boxes as I can get 28 [6] ounce treatments at $0.54 cents a treatment. Now that's cost effective and lots of dead roaches!

a reply to: Waterglass

This is hilarious! I can picture the box o' wine alongside fertilizer, weed spray and 2-cycle oil on a shelf in the garage (or carport, since we are talking Southlands.)

Nice example of accidental invention - not to mention your new & improved wine quality.

I wonder what Mad Dog 20/20 would do ? Could be the glyphosate of all wines

a reply to: DJMSN

I never knew that. Here is what Forbes wrote but hay , we never know.

22,634 viewsFeb 28, 2019, 08:31pm There's No Need To Panic Over Weedkiller In Beer And Wine Jenny Splitter Jenny Splitter Contributor Food & Drink I cover the intersection of technology, farming and food.

a reply to: dogstar23

Try cheap beer in a aluminum small pie tin for slugs. Place on ground anywhere. The beer will go for about a week. They get drunk as skunks and drown. Some are huge.

Thanks.

I hate palmetto bugs.

My first encounter with one, was in base housing in S. Carolina...

It was crawling up the wall, and I grabbed a fly swatter. When I went to whack him, I paused for a second... I wondered if it would kill it, or if I was just gonna arm him with a fly swatter.

In that moment of hesitation, the damned thing flew off the wall... heading straight for my face. Every school aged child in a 3 block radius, learned many new expletive words that day.

Somehow I managed to knock the thing out of the air... or my loud shrieking may have stunned it, who knows... but I dropped a big freaking book on it.

Kill them all. Leave no survivors.

Cool stuff!

Why not try an assortment of hobo wines as well and see if there is any difference.

a reply to: madmac5150
My first encounter with a palmetto bug was on a military base in Florida in 1980. It made the SC bugs in the OP look small.
I was walking outside on the base one night and one flew out of the top of a palm tree. It aimed right for me and hit me s yard in the middle of the forehead. I asked the woman walking with me “What the F%#k was THAT?”
She said, “Oh that was a palmetto bug, like giant roaches.... and they do that all the time.”
Thought, Oh yay.... giant roaches that fly out of trees to smack you in the head.

Obviously, I live in the palmetto bugs home state of Florida. A word of caution: don't smack one. Juice and guts fly everywhere.

LOL !I do not miss those giant flying cockroaches .

I grew up around Red Bank and Lexington.

Never tried wine before, just swatted them with my hat.

a reply to: Waterglass
Being a Floridian I can really appreciate this great Tale!!!
I can add my own discovery from a party long long ago. It was a BYOB and someone brought the Nattie ICE Tall Boys aka Natural Ice. The wife wouldn't even it allow it in the house because of what it turned our friends into in a very short period of time.

As parties go, one rarely cleans up the night it was had and puts it off till morning. With the smorgasbord of choice to drink left laying around in varying degrees of finished, yes I too came to find out that the same prize winning roaches had only a taste for the Nattie Ice.

Who knew???
Feel free to add this other form of destruction in you AOC green presentation. Sometimes it is good that the buyer too has a choice!

I live in Wilmington NC and I hate those things. I try not to squish them, as the mess they make is epic. I'll have to try this.

LOL ae our first home my ex-wife and I lived back to a little forest with a small lake and creek down the hill. We used to get huge flying palmettos among others here in Georgia. So I got the biggest bug zapper I could find, ran an extension cord to the corner of our lot about 125 feet away. But I snipped open up the gaps on the bug zapper so larger ones could get in there about 2 inches square. There would be the longest zaps all night long and when you would go out in the morning and there would be piles underneath the zapper as well as ones fried to the screen

Hmm... I'm not too familiar with the "Palmetto bug" but looking at the picture (and based on the other members stories about them) they look/sound to me like the typical flying household cockroaches (Periplaneta americana). Upon looking up the "Palmetto bug" (Eurycotis floridana) and looking at pictures, it seems they're a flightless species? Much like many of the bush cockroaches we have in Australia. I have no qualms with the bush roaches, they typically stay outdoors and are nothing like the dirty household roaches which tend to fly straight at you when approached. As a kid (into entomology) I used to keep the giant burrowing cockroaches as pets... they grow to be as big as your hand, eat only dead leaves, and make great pets for kids.

In any case I think a lot of people are confusing the American Cockroach (Periplaneta americana) with the Palmetto bug (Eurycotis floridana) .

a reply to: Waterglass

I actually thought of using alcohol to make a roach trap. They are attracted to a variety of alcoholic beverages.

You can have some sort of net or mesh to catch them above it and maybe a slippery ramp, trap door or something to make it a one way portal into the trap. Maybe someone can design one and make a lot of money.

a reply to: putnam6

Sounds nasty. You'll have exploded bugs everywhere.

a reply to: Waterglass

Palmetto Bugs!

You mean roaches?

originally posted by: Waterglass
Using simple cheap arse "boxed" Cabernet Sauvignon Red Wine as produced by Franzia, we seduced, invited, intoxicated and induced death by drowning; six [6] trophy sized Palmetto Bugs.

Franzia is a brand of wine produced by The Wine Group, known for its box wines sold in 3 and 5-liter cartons. Franzia wines, throughout their history, were known as affordable table wines, popular in the 1960s and 1970s as "jug wine", and now as "box wine".

Us classy people refer to that as 'Cardbordeaux'.
You're welcome.
And Happy Thanksgiving!

a reply to: NoCorruptionAllowed

I need to get a hold of some of that white lightening @ 99.9% pure grain alcohol and add some maple syrup to it for bait. Same stuff we used to drink in college only to then have a "moon shot" while lying in bed then see Jesus and blow our cookies all over the place.

a reply to: Navieko

I even found a dead Dung Beetle in the yard. Took some pics. I wonder where that guy came from. Insect Caravan?