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My wife's Diarrhea experience - [SS2019] - Writer

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posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 05:26 AM
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A sneaky fart,
a suspicious leak.
Lifted the covers to take a peek.
Too late to shut the gate!
Out it came at a thundering rate.
Over the bed and across the doona.
I couldn't get out of bed any sooner.
Landed, on bent knees,
cursing the curry pie and peas.
Rumbling, rattling crap squirting from my bod.
Missus leaps up yelling, "OH MY GOD!"

The END!




posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 05:33 AM
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Now that is a scene you do not read about every day S&F



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 06:46 AM
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Why?....WHY????...did I click on this????

I thought...no, surely it can't be...but then there it was!

Curry pie and peas....

A "Havana Omelette" waiting to happen!

**GAK, GAK, GAK**
edit on 4/3/2019 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 08:06 AM
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a reply to: bally001

Excellent!...I would be happy to hear more about your wife's intimate moments.



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 09:36 AM
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Reminds me of that episode on Nip Tuck and the hot tub.




posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 10:16 AM
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Sounds like an experience of someone who is taking Metformin.


I knew about five people who had those symptoms from that med.



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 10:25 AM
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a reply to: bally001

great story!



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 10:45 AM
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disqualified. more than 50 words . plus its not really suspenseful or paranoia related.
These competitions need to be more strenuous.

~A newb.

a reply to: bally001



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 11:51 AM
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originally posted by: neo96
Reminds me of that episode on Nip Tuck and the hot tub.



That is probably the only scene I remember from that series.. gross!!



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 11:59 AM
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a reply to: chris_stibrany



that was tongue in cheek by the way...



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 12:18 PM
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a reply to: bally001

Nice writing about an ugly scene.

I could not resist but to post this in this thread. Forgive me, in advance, for my sick mind and dark humor:

www.youtube.com...



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 02:17 PM
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I really like the adolescent vibe that now permeates this site. So refreshing than that stupid "deny ignorance" BS.
edit on 3-4-2019 by olaru12 because: brenda cio...



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 02:37 PM
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a reply to: bally001




posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 08:36 PM
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a reply to: bally001

Your ability to paint this scene so poetically, reveals the very nature of your candor.

Bravo! Good Sir.

Very suspicious, and leaves us with questions, about their continued success as a couple.

Compelling, indeed.

From it's very title, It drew me in. I had to know more. Ending with laughter that made me long for a pub.





posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 09:05 PM
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a reply to: rickymouse

Reminds me of this
originally posted on craigslist.



DO NOT EAT PRINGLES FAT FREE POTATO CHIPS. THEY WILL GREASE YOUR ASS. (ANAL LEAKAGE, ANYBODY?) Don't even ----- say a word. I like potato chips, and can't eat them very much or I'll get fat. I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the #. The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont f@#king tell you... Except in tiny print you cant read without a f#$king electron microscope ...is that the primary ingredient is something called "olean" which I have since learned is Latin for "Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease." Oh Yeah. I'm not even kidding. So today, while I'm standing in the living room debating whether or not Laundry or Dishes will get done first, I get the urge to fart. I live alone, so sweet. I let the honk loose and its wrong. Something just sounded wrong. I know my own wind, and I have never farted a sound that sounded like a fart wrapped in a pillow. Oh yes, something was very wrong. I had just shat myself. But this evil olean makes sh#tting yourself sound almost like a regular fart, and had I not been particularly attentive, it could easily have gone unnoticed, I'm telling you. THAT's how utterly covert and evil this olean stuff is. What the f#ck?! What if I'd gone out to hang with friends or gone for a drive, what then? So I walk carefully to the bathroom and disrobe. before I even sit on the toilet, I wad paper and carefully wipe from the front. Sure enough, it was light brown, and had the texture of soft spackle. You #ing Pringle bastards. I sat down and pushed a bit, and lo, out came a jet that I didnt even feel an urge for one minute earlier. It piled in the bowl like brown marshmallow fluff. The problem rose when I tried to wipe. I went through a whole f%^king roll of TP and could not get it all off me. So. I jumped in the shower. Yep, its gross, but it had to be done. There I stood, water pouring down, cheeks spread, and using my own hand to make certain I'm clean. That was when I discovered that after using my hand to wipe myself (before I soaped the area) my hand came back covered in some sort of transparent grease. It was so #ing foul. The grease made water bead off my hand. It was tacky too, and very difficult to manage. So I grabbed the bar of saop and went to work. You #ing Pringle bastards. The bar of soap came away coated in grease as well, and would no longer wash. I had to turn the water to hot and massage the soap for five minutes to get it to the point where I could use it again. It took me an hour to get the #ing grease off my pucker. I shudder to think of what its doing INSIDE ME right now, but I will damned sure never eat that # again. F@#king Pringle bastards. This is where the joke about "anal leakage" came from. its real. F&ck Pringles.



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 10:48 PM
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a reply to: vonclod

I tried the ketogenic diet to control my epilepsy, it makes the poop into glue putty and you might need to use soap to loosen it from your butt cheeks.
I think I would rather have a partial seizure than have to use a spatula to remove the poop. It also costs ten cents in toilet paper every time you poop.



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 11:22 PM
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Mine is coming!

Wrote two and have made a choice which is better.

I’ve read a couple stories and they are good!!




posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 11:33 PM
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a reply to: rickymouse

Oh my..lol, sorry about the Epilepsy, I know a few people with it, they seldom have seizures, I can't imagine how frightening it must be when they occur.



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 11:39 PM
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Pure genius, you certainly have a way with words!



posted on Apr, 3 2019 @ 11:48 PM
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originally posted by: vonclod
a reply to: rickymouse

Oh my..lol, sorry about the Epilepsy, I know a few people with it, they seldom have seizures, I can't imagine how frightening it must be when they occur.




I control mine with diet since I reacted badly to all five classes of meds. I have been doing that for ten years now and have not had any seizures, some close calls and colors and sounds but no seizures. Using diet to control epilepsy is not that fun, most people would not like what I eat, including me. I make it taste really good, but I can't eat a lot of the really tasty foods anymore that many people enjoy and get a fun buzz off of.







 
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