Bullying at work

a reply to: MagnaCarta2015

Hello, First of all i wanted to say that this is an interesting thread so i SnFd it .

Secondly , I was wondering if i could enquire as to what country your from ?

This is really troubling and i am actually quite disturbed by this, noone deserves to be bullied like that . At work of all places too and i feel really bad for this guy . I understand that going to the bathroom all the time is not conductive to a healthy work environment especially if other people are having to carry your workload because of this but who can say if this guy has some sort of condition or legitimate reason for having to run to the bathroom all the time ?

Also i would like to add that the piece of S#%# that put him on show in front of everyone deserves a smack in the mouth and should face some sort of disciplinary action . Its just not professional and any person that condones or joins in on that kind of behaviour should also be dealt with (Including management) . If management are too gutless to step up and do their job in regards to providing a safe and comfortable work environment for the employees then i would go straight over the top of their heads or at least speak to them about it before taking further action .

I would like to add that even though it would be so tempting to clean this bully up, do not do anything that would land you in hot water and if you pursue this then make sure you do it the right way and through correct channels .

Interesting thread again .

O85

Sometimes you have to pull the awkward out and get them to open up. I like the teamwork philosophy of finding the weak link and making it stronger by rallying around it and shoring it up , rather then cutting it from the chain.

Understand the victims culture - is he Muslim... then say hello and inquire on Eid, or something of their world and pull him into the culture of the office by sharing. Find the funny you both understand. And get him to stand a little firmer.

Guys are a*&%les - Sorry it's true... I am a Vet, grew up in a Body Shop and know if you can't hang with the straight up a(*&!e behavior they start swimming like sharks around the injured. Try to get the victim to find some inner courage.

originally posted by: MagnaCarta2015
I half expected him to snap the guy in half but he didn't, he just grabbed his coat and his bag and went to the toilets where he audibly cried for half an hour before sneaking out the back of the building and went home.

human beings f****ng suck man.

I think it is important to realize people only take away from you what you let them. If someone is pulling an emotion reaction out of you then it's nobody's fault but your own. We are the owners of our own psychological development and strength.

a reply to: dfnj2015

I think it is important to realize that humans are not isolated islands. We are social beings and people are part of our environment. And the environment influences and affects you, no matter what you've deluded yourself into believing.

If what you just said was true, then there would be no boundaries about what we could say (or do) to one another in any given situation but as it stands, where I live, there are lines that shouldn't be crossed. When they are crossed it's called harassment. And deep down inside those harassments feel like betrayals, cause we humans have feelings about things.

But I agree that what we do with our feelings is our own responsibility- and that how we view the world shapes our feelings about things in a big way. But changing how we view the world is not so easy for anybody, as the christian who is taught to rejoice in suffering knows very well. Things hurt, they hurt deep. Like when you know that it's wrong but you can't do anything about it... And others may recycle the abuse more directly, however I am glad to say that I have art and the like to recycle the abuse through- and I will own that sh-t and those feelings and that behavior and my own actions. But I will never, ever own the direct, hurtful, recycling of abuse of others.

If what you just said was true, I could (along with the majority of people surrounding you) call you an idiot and stupid and worthless all day long and you wouldn't be phased. But even if ONE person treats you like you're a dumb piece of sh-t in public all the time and the public does nothing... you would be phased. You would be influenced. You're only lying to yourself and everyone else when you say otherwise. I know that you would be deeply affected because not only would you be being abused by one individual (or more), the public that never does anything about it is showing you that they don't care about you enough to do anything about it either and that, too, is another kind of abuse. Maybe a worse kind of abuse.

In short, you are wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong WRONG.

Also just because a person is resilient... it doesn't mean that they should accept or subject themselves to hostile, toxic environments either. Like just because you can fix something... it doesn't mean you get to break things just for sh-ts and giggles. It might be like that for some people, but not for me.

Well it went ok, fortunately some of the girls from the office went out drinking with the bully last night and convinced him to apologise this morning, it wasn't anywhere near as public but he accepted it so it's all good.

I took the guy out for lunch and even though the language barrier made it damn near impossible to have a conversation it was enjoyable. It all worked out a lot better than punching the guy in the face and quitting anyway, thanks for the input .

a reply to: TobyFlenderson

I once worked with a power lifter who actually set off the smoke detectors after using the commode.

I know this is a serious topic but I can't stop laughing - seriously what's coming out of his ~arse...smoke or fire?

a reply to: MagnaCarta2015

and even though the language barrier made it damn near impossible to have a conversation it was enjoyable

earlier you wrote this

Anyway, there's this muslim guy from Dubai who works there, he's been there longer than me and he hardly speaks English

Its good that its all working out. What I cant understand is if you're doing office work in a construction company how can the the muslim guy get anything done if his English is not strong?

a reply to: TheConstruKctionofLight

I wasn't present in the stall, so didn't actually see what came out. I think there was too much particulate matter in the gas, I would suppose. This was quite a few years ago and the technology might not have been what it is today. It was funny as hell. The incredible thing is that the guy was quite proud of it.

a reply to: TheConstruKctionofLight

He processes contract payments on the internal system using some kind of quasi algebraic code, I don't understand it but XNRIV would be something like gas box, 2 gangs, kerb with slabs etc. It's pretty much the only job in the office where communication isn't required.

a reply to: MagnaCarta2015

Awesome.. Not the great big Hollywood ending some people might have wanted but life is rarely like that.. Usually it's somewhere down the middle, like in this case. Glad things got resolved