originally posted by: rukia
But then, not everyone reacts with jealousy. It's people like that that make me happy. To me, that's beautiful.
Fundamentally, the key is to not worry about what other people are thinking and concentrate on what you think. What seems important in your teens and
twenties eventually fades into insignificance as you get older, have a greater depth of perspective, and if you have developed yourself, worked on
your skills etc, then you will know that what you have is yours by endeavour, not because it was handed to you on a platter because you are pretty.
People can think what they like, you will know
In terms of there being an intelligence/attractiveness correlation, perhaps, in some, but definately not in all. Intelligence is plastic, can be
developed, or it can atrophy due to a lack of decent material to work with. There is also though the factor of adversity, the more we overcome, the
smarter we get. That works however you look, at whatever station in life you find yourself. We all have crosses to bear, and how we approach and
overcome those, is what makes life interesting, dynamic and an experience of learning. Being beautiful offers certain advantages, if you wish to
exploit them, if not, they can be a disadvantage. Same with anything and everything, it is where you apply the focus. If intelligence and beauty
were intrinsically associated, there would be significantly less objectification and exploitation of youthful sexuality. I hate having my photo
taken, therefore turning down offers to model was a no brainer, but to others it may seem like easy money, but very few women, once objectified, make
it back to being taken seriously in the public eye
, however intelligent they may be. Some do though use it to springboard to other things, to
pay for school, to help others or to go into business. It is down to the individual and what they want out of life. Lots of dumb young girls and
boys, oozing beauty out of every pore, have been used up and cast aside and there are always more being born to refill the ranks. The actively
intelligent amongst us can protect ourselves from the perceived "pitfalls", which is indeed another advantage but one that requires hard work if it is
to be an advantage in the long term.
So, if you're intelligent, take it on the chin and recognise it for what it is, superficial people being superficial. So long as you make sure that
you invest more of your time and resources into your intelligence rather than your appearance, it evens itself out. You have absolutely no control
over what others think, feel and do, but absolute control over yourself. Let them get on with it. Getting out of life what you want out of it, is a
long game for the vast majority to us, and there is no such thing as a free ride, all experience carries with it the opportunity to learn. Falling
flat on your face, being hated for something you have no control over, can make you a much better person, on the inside, or it can make you a
self-pitying whiner...it's a choice...but recognising that there is always someone worse off than you, overcoming the seemingly insurmountable, does
make it easier to get back up, dust yourself off and start all over again.
Life may seem easier for some, but if it hasn't been easy for me, I am kind of glad, it is all turning out quite well in the second half because I
stayed true to what I valued rather than what I was told I should value. By middle age, you will realise that the people around you are a reflection
of you, if you find them beautiful, that is a better indication of whether you are too than the reflection in the mirror.