Forgiveness or Forgetting. . How can one forgive the man who murdered your sister...

Here is a story about a lovely couple murdered in the basement of their Winnetka townhome.

In short, The killer was New Trier High School student David Biro. Biro later bragged about the murders, which led a friend to leave a tip with the Winnetka police. Police later found the murder weapon at Biro's home.

It don't know how to respond to this. It don't know if I could forgive and shake the hand of the killer who held the weapon that killed my sister......

There will be a special that will aire on television in the US "a change of heart"

Linky

a reply to: ReadLeader

I don't know if I could, but I know why you need to.

Harboring that level of negative emotion against someone who did something like that to you hurts you and keeps on hurting you. And as harsh as it is, the person who did you that hurt will almost certainly never know or care that they are still hurting you. They aren't hurting over it at all and they are still hurting you all those years later over what they did to you.

It would be wonderful if we could make them feel the remorse they should for the pain they caused, but you can't do that.

Again, it all comes back to the hard truth that only person in life you can ultimately really control is yourself. So you forgive. It's all you can do. You let go and stop giving that person the power to keep hurting you. In the end, you aren't doing it for them and they may not ever appreciate what you have done, they likely won't know or care. You have to do it for yourself, so you don't get eaten alive by it.

I can't say that I've ever had to let go of or forgive a murder, but I did spend a period of years in a manipulative, abusive relationship. And I had to give that up and stop hurting over that. I had to forgive and let it go so it would stop hurting me and I could go on.

a reply to: ketsuko

Very well worded. I know what I would "have to do" according to my beliefs. .. . Follow through , however, would most certainly define myself. Thanks for posting.

a reply to: ReadLeader

That is where I fall short. I can forgive things that people do to me, but not my family. Sorry Baby Jesus, but I am just a flesh and blood stupid ass hole human.

you can never forget what they did. Remember forgiveness is not forgetting. Forgiveness is letting go of grudge and hatred so you can move on. We either forgive them or we will be in torment the rest of our lives.

Even if they don't ask you for forgiveness you should forgive it will set you free and leave all judgement in the hands of the righteous Judge who will judge all men at his appearance.

a reply to: Revolution9

Jesus is not a baby.

And really I think you would have a better self attitude than that.

originally posted by: ReadLeader
Here is a story about a lovely couple murdered in the basement of their Winnetka townhome.

In short, The killer was New Trier High School student David Biro. Biro later bragged about the murders, which led a friend to leave a tip with the Winnetka police. Police later found the murder weapon at Biro's home.

It don't know how to respond to this. It don't know if I could forgive and shake the hand of the killer who held the weapon that killed my sister......

There will be a special that will aire on television in the US "a change of heart"

Linky

My general attitude is forgive and forget,but someone violently harming my family is where I draw the line.
I'd let most things go but if someone kills a family member of mine or causes serious injury on purpose they will killed and disposed of,and I'll wait for them to get out of jail if the law finds them first.

I shot and killed a man in an attempted home invasion......(attempted home invasion). I know if a man had killed a member of my family... I would want his life to end. Eye for & eye. I would want him to die in a fashion that was a kin to how he took my family members life....and I would want to be the one that does it. There would be no forgiveness....that's for the imaginary God to do. If I couldn't get to the ACTUAL PERSON....Then his family is open game.

"Forgiveness"

It’s the hardest thing to give away
And the last thing on your mind today
It always goes to those that don’t deserve

It’s the opposite of how you feel
When the pain they caused is just too real
It takes everything you have just to say the word…

Forgiveness
Forgiveness

It flies in the face of all your pride
It moves away the mad inside
It’s always anger’s own worst enemy
Even when the jury and the judge
Say you gotta right to hold a grudge
It’s the whisper in your ear saying ‘Set It Free’

Forgiveness, Forgiveness
Forgiveness, Forgiveness

Show me how to love the unlovable
Show me how to reach the unreachable
Help me now to do the impossible

Forgiveness, Forgiveness

Help me now to do the impossible
Forgiveness

It’ll clear the bitterness away
It can even set a prisoner free
There is no end to what it’s power can do
So, let it go and be amazed
By what you see through eyes of grace
The prisoner that it really frees is you

Forgiveness, Forgiveness
Forgiveness, Forgiveness

Show me how to love the unlovable
Show me how to reach the unreachable
Help me now to do the impossible
Forgiveness

I want to finally set it free
So show me how to see what Your mercy sees
Help me now to give what You gave to me
Forgiveness, Forgiveness

a reply to: ReadLeader

Forgetting something like this is not realistic, it never happens, its BS.

Forgiving, well some can and do but others ....

Forgiveness is necessary, though I try to feel myself in your shoes and I understand this is very hard...

If you forgive then you will forget.
The main thing here is to forgive and the hardest one

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