The Monster Within... A Message to the Depressed.

Thanks for this thread, Jude11. I think it's important for those suffering to have a place to voice it….I don't know that knowing we're not alone does any good, really. That's just one of those things: people always tell you, well you're not crippled, you don't have cancer, your life isn't what that guy's is….and that seldom helps, really--at least for me.
I am what I am; the comparisons don't serve any purpose. It's as useful as the LPN in the doctor's office the other day telling me I had to quit stressing out or I'd give myself a stroke. Let it go, she said.

I'd love to. That's the thing. It's not a question of cognitively changing my thinking, just looking at it differently, or waking up in the morning and deciding I'll think myself out of this hole…. If it were that simple, pharmacopia and psycopia wouldn't be necessary at all, and they're both huge, powerful industries.

Anyway, when you look at the statistics for clinical depression in the world's population, it seems quite alarming, and informs us that there is more to this than meets the eye. So whatever we can do to talk about it, find ways to cope with it, and somehow get out of it can't be overlooked or undersold, imho.

tetra

originally posted by: tetra50
Thanks for this thread, Jude11. I think it's important for those suffering to have a place to voice it….I don't know that knowing we're not alone does any good, really. That's just one of those things: people always tell you, well you're not crippled, you don't have cancer, your life isn't what that guy's is….and that seldom helps, really--at least for me.
I am what I am; the comparisons don't serve any purpose. It's as useful as the LPN in the doctor's office the other day telling me I had to quit stressing out or I'd give myself a stroke. Let it go, she said.

I'd love to. That's the thing. It's not a question of cognitively changing my thinking, just looking at it differently, or waking up in the morning and deciding I'll think myself out of this hole…. If it were that simple, pharmacopia and psycopia wouldn't be necessary at all, and they're both huge, powerful industries.

Anyway, when you look at the statistics for clinical depression in the world's population, it seems quite alarming, and informs us that there is more to this than meets the eye. So whatever we can do to talk about it, find ways to cope with it, and somehow get out of it can't be overlooked or undersold, imho.

tetra

No thanks needed because this is Needed.

Thanks for the share.

Peace

a reply to: jude11

and Peace to you. Something I would say to all who have contributed here, as well….
thanks for sharing and opening yourself up for the rest of us scared to do so, sometimes…..
It means something in desperate, desolate experience. Take care, everyone.
tetra

To everyone in here... I care and understand.

Very nice video. I think the author described core depression very nicely. But the level of ones depression is a continuum from mild-functional to catatonic-immobility.

Anyone experienced somatiform? All of a sudden one of more appendages of your body won't fully answer the helm. Kind of like a stroke. For instance, you have to consciously will your hand to grip the doorknob; then you have to concentrate twice as hard to make the hand turn the knob.

Then there are the morbid ideations. Self-loathing so severe that you can imagine being sawed in half lengthwise. Or you imagine the release you would feel if the ceiling were to collapse on you right now.

And of course there is that state where you can't focus long enough to carry on an intelligent conversation. I'd strongly suggest that you don't operate a motor vehicle in this state of mind.

And one of the pre-suicidal states is the recklessness state. Self preservation mechanisms are completely deactivated. "I have the overwhelming urge to take that bowl of food away from that snarling angry pit bull dog."

Depression can be a pain so deep that it defies description. But it's not a physical pain, that's easier to overcome. It's a pain in the mind. It feels like part of your soul is dying.

Sometimes as we descend into the depths of our melancholy, we consider the same remedy that one might employ for a fatal mind-numbing physical pain. Euthanasia. In this case, that's self-termination. That's the only way to completely silence the mind and permanently end the pain.

Here on ATS was where I first saw the announcement that RW had died of apparent suicide. I was immediately saddened and it affected me a great deal. But some of the folks in this thread can appreciate those last few moments of RW's life: Oh the sense of relief he must have felt.

Everyone with Depression has a different way of coping. Most of the time I'm of the opinion that I exist in this cruel simulation for some reason. So, I try to find the "magic" purpose of my existence for each day.

But make no mistake, there is a level that most of us can reach that negates any and all purpose to exist. All of the logical reasons for existence just don't resonate in light of the excruciating pain in your soul.

Dex


BTW: Doom Porn is another one of my coping mechanisms. Why else would I hang around this place.

a reply to: Night Star

Thank you, your response to Dodol means more than I can express.

Thanks for bringing light to a far more ominous problem in the world right now.
Hopefully someone will benefit from this thread.

a reply to: jude11

Thanks for one of the best videos I have seen on depression. A few years ago I spent a couple of weeks in a hospital suffering from it and they taught me a lot but my family loved the video as its a disease that runs down through the generations - I can see it on one of my sons, like a black mantle around him on occasions.

My granddaughter has the antidote for it, she rushes in jumps on my stomach, grabs my arms and jumps up and down giggling. She is like a tonic and occasionally catches me before it goes too deep.

I do think with people like Robbie Williams, when you see the funny side you are also open to seeing the sad side of the same situation and the sad side sometimes doesn't go away.

I do think with people like Robbie Williams, when you see the funny side you are also open to seeing the sad side of the same situation and the sad side sometimes doesn't go away.

a reply to: Shiloh7


Absolutely. You nailed it there. For all our pain, we have to find the laughter to live through it. The sad part, and I think of this when I think of him, is no one was there for him in the end, to comfort, to hug him, to know that and be there….and that is overwhelming sadness, expressed, ultimately.
tetra

Just thought i like to say this in response to the title of the thread. Depression is not a monster its your friend. You are depressed for a reason and the depression is telling you something and that you should find out what. Once you pinpointed what is causing your depression THEN you can do something about it. For some its easy to fix like a change of job or a new partner etc for others its not so easy so they can go years suffering depression. Once you find the source of what is causing your depression it does change things when you get that epiphany

a reply to: jude11Why did you even bother making a Robin Williams mention, then? As far as conspiracies goes; well, there are a few coinky-dinks that fit the M.O. Do some research and you'll see. Also, how is everyone sooooooooo sure depression is a medical issue? I mean, Robin Williams said he was hearing little voices. Doesn't sound like a medical issue to me. Sounds to me like Robin was battling some demons. Go to the psych clinic and tell them you hear voices. Let me know what happens. lol I'm certain, they won't be telling you you're depressed. You might, however, find yourself in a padded room, strapped to a table. lmfao You people are too much, with all the propaganda.

If you hear a voice, telling you to "jump", "pull the trigger", "pop those pills".....REBUKE THAT DEVIL!!!!! You ain't depressed. You're possessed.

originally posted by: Cantbebothered
Just thought i like to say this in response to the title of the thread. Depression is not a monster its your friend. You are depressed for a reason and the depression is telling you something and that you should find out what. Once you pinpointed what is causing your depression THEN you can do something about it. For some its easy to fix like a change of job or a new partner etc for others its not so easy so they can go years suffering depression. Once you find the source of what is causing your depression it does change things when you get that epiphany

Treating depression is usually not as simple as that. There are different kinds of depression that affect people in different ways. For the vast majority of sufferers, simply ending a toxic relationship or changing changing jobs will not help in the long-term. Many sufferers have a family history, which makes attempting to treat the problem by addressing external circumstances very difficult as the underlying cause is most likely genetic.

Many people tend to assume depressed people are the lonely, quiet, introverted, gloomy ones who are suffering financial hardship with few friends or family to support them. The truth is that the condition affects a diverse range of people from all walks of life and social statuses.

Depression is a condition that affects the individual deeply from within.

a reply to: jude11

I wrote this and put it into the Short Stories Forum. It kinda fits this Thread too, so here's a Copy/Paste of it.

My Poem, "Darkness" : Hope You like It. Syx.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Darkness falls on the Sunlit room
Taking away the light,
and filling it with gloom.

Not the whole room it seems
but just around Me,
why does the Darkness loom?

The crowd of people quiet down
when I enter the room
seems I make the flowers wilt,
instead of helping them bloom.

Darkness and despair
follow me wherever I go
I wish for the days
to see the Sunlight flow.

Alas, gone are the
Sunny days of lore.
I fill my life
with Darkness once more......

As someone who suffers from depression if have found my salvation in trees....no matter the weather, Rain, Snow, Hail or shine...i find just being around the forest helps me get my $*@t together...
Now what is it about the Trees?. Are they Healing me?, is it the isolation?.. or am i Healing myself just by being there?...

I dont know and i dont care. it just works for me..Stuff the Doctor and the pill popping here's a ready made cure culture. tried that. it wasn't for me.

Just go find that one something that makes you function again and use it to your advantage.

People have asked me in the past why am i such a Loner, why i dont communicate like normal people do...Dont have the answer to that but it seems to be more of a problem to them that i am what i am than it is to me.

Like Robin, i'm a fun guy, always cracking the jokes, always trying to make others laugh. I guess deep down i'm getting some sort of kick from making others laugh whilst i'm hurting inside....Time to head to the Trees to recharge, reconnect the Broken wires..

Awesome Video BTW... S&F

Quick EDIT...I dont SUFFER from depression...I HAVE Depression from time to time and i deal with it....Just thought i would clear that up.

We all need love,health and a desire to be a useful/respected and an overall good human being in order to feel good...The world is a very scary place for people who don't experience any of those qualities,no matter how rich,famous or beautiful they are...We all experience depression periods in our life and if we focus on the real problems and try to accept or solve it, we wouldn't need to calm ourselves with drugs,alcohol,food or any other substances which will eventually lead us to the point of no return...Life is a great amusement park and we all have tickets with an expiry date on them. It is all up to us to choose the rides.

a reply to: Cantbebothered

Once you pinpointed what is causing your depression THEN you can do something about it. For some its easy to fix like a change of job or a new partner etc for others its not so easy so they can go years suffering depression. Once you find the source of what is causing your depression it does change things...

For the average every day person, yes depression can be temporary and they can bounce back from it. For others, they know why they are depressed and are depressed because they Can't do anything about it. They can't bring back the person who divorced them or the family member or friend who died, or cure their degenerative physical problems. Maybe they are living in a dangerous neighborhood and can't afford to leave. Maybe for some it is just one negative thing after another, year after year after year that can't be changed or improved.

The last one is me. I have been through too many negative experiences outside of my control for too long. Just since 2008, I had lost my Father, been hit by a mini van as a pedestrian that left me with nerve damage in one leg, had breast cancer, became disabled with spinal problems, had a husband of 34 years who all of a sudden decides he doesn't want to be married anymore. I take one day at a time. I do have good days. I try to help others when I can.

a reply to: Night Star

I always think that there is a reason for the sufferings we experience,and I am sure our personalities evolve stronger and stronger with each and every one of them.There are many things that we can do and enjoy the life despite all our disadvantages and shortcomings...Not taking life and specially ourselves too seriously is a big step towards a happier life.I have found out that being thankful helps me to breath easier and be more in tune with the universe...At the end nothing really matters except love and kindness and nothing will remain of us except a good or a bad name,so we better be as humane as we can, sit back, relax, go with the flow and enjoy the show,and do not forget to contribute...So go on and find a nice ride to enjoy girl,you will be amazed how easy and fun it is.

originally posted by: Soloprotocol
As someone who suffers from depression if have found my salvation in trees....no matter the weather, Rain, Snow, Hail or shine...i find just being around the forest helps me get my $*@t together...
Now what is it about the Trees?. Are they Healing me?, is it the isolation?.. or am i Healing myself just by being there?...

Maybe underneath it all the trees have a consciousness of their own, and can help heal and guide you if you are lucky and learn to communicate with them on their level...

maybe...

People must understand the difference of mourning someone that passed away from being depressed.
It is natural to feel sad for someone's passing, but it is not natural to keep lingering on that feeling for months. What is normal is for people to get their act together over time.
It is not only losing good people (even pets!) that can lead to a depression though.


People go and start looking around themselves and feel powerless because they set an objective in life, feel like they wasted time and are still far away from it. They see now the opportunities go by and have no more willpower to pursue them. And that leads to more "wasted" time, which leads to less willpower, etc etc etc, ad infinitum.
That for example can lead to an anxiety/depression diagnosis, they tend to go together those two.

The thing is, people sometimes set too high of an objective for them in the short run and forget that whatever it is that you want as a dream, will take lots and lots of arduous and hard work.
Nothing in this life comes easy, those other succesful people around you, unless extremely lucky, had to work their asses off to get where they are now, and so must you.


So, instead of setting this huge objective in the short run, let go of it for a bit, evaluate where you are in life and see what the natural first step towards that huge goal is and set it as your next objective instead.


Slow and steady you will reach that easier goal, and start stablishing a very strong basis for yourself as you move on to the then next objective wich you will then know it is within your grasp and towards your dreams.



I know it is easier said than done, but it is as simple as that.

You may think waking up everyday and looking in the mirror saying "I can do it" or "I am awesome" is a dumb thing to do. As a matter of fact it is not, because all you are doing is affirming a truth.

You can do it and yes you are awesome. No time in your life is ever wasted, every experience teaches us something new, and they all take time, time wich is precious.

Some people take a longer time to learn a valuable lesson than other people, but do not ever think you wasted time, even right now as you are depressed you are learning a lesson, and you will snap out of it when you want to from the bottom of your soul.


Having a family support you can help you but in the end, it is all up to you.
Not having a family to support you will make it harder but in the end, it is all up to you.
Anti depressants can help you but in the end, it is all up to you.


Unless you were born with a very serious case of retardation, or suffered an accident that led to serious brain damage, things that could mentally limit your life like that, you can do whatever you put your mind into, just take your time and start acting on it.


You still do not realize how awesome you are, how unique you and everyone else is, the ammount of potential stored within.

So stop saying you can't and start believing in yourself again, start moving, even if it feels fake in the beginning, even if it feels like a wasted time, even if you think I am just some stupid person from the internet that does not know jack.

Just do it, because you can!

originally posted by: RoScoLaz4
welcome to my world.

Ditto.