It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

The Monster Within... A Message to the Depressed.

page: 2
57
<< 1    3  4  5 >>

log in

join
share:

posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 07:22 PM
link   
a reply to: jude11

The problem is when you don't have anyone that will be left behind. I have my husband but I really struggle with the fact that I once again I don't have a single living blood relative. It is a very overwhelming realization that confronts me every morning when I wake up. I dealt with it as a teen and young adult and then I had kids and a blood connection to someone. Now I am in the same boat again.

It annoys me to know end when people say reach out to your family. People always make assumptions that people have family.




posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 07:22 PM
link   
If anyone is depressed and wants to U2u me, that's fine. I'm a good listener. I took myself off yet another anti-depressant. I get too zoned out, zombie like. LOL I do have a med for anxiety which helps a great deal as I tend to really worry and stress over things I have no control over.

Try to spend time with an awesome friend, get out into nature and soak up the sun and fresh air. Lose yourself in the pages of a great book or movie. Sometimes diversions help. Get some pretty little fish. They make you smile when all else sucks. Just know that you are never truly alone. You have your ATS family by your side.




posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 07:27 PM
link   
a reply to: Night Star




You have your ATS family by your side.



Well I wish that were so, but there are many cruel and thoughtless people here also, very unfortunate.



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 07:34 PM
link   
That was an amazing video and thanks for sharing jude11


I've had problems with depression and anxiety since my teens so I resonate with this alot. Sometimes you just don't want people helping you in the sense that you feel that any kinda help seems so false and alien and even a little bit insulting as you feel that your problems are so unique and complicated that nobody could possibly begin to understand what you're going through and they don't appreciate that you just can't snap out of something so easily.

In fact theres been times when people have tried to help me and it's actually made things worse as i get the feeling that i'm pressured into feeling better and somehow i'm letting this person down buy not responding to there efforts which will then lead me to start cutting these people out of my life because i just can't face them because I feel so much pressure that I should be making progress when I know deep down if I was to face them I'd feel like a fraud.

It's littrally like having the weight of the world on your shoulders because society seems to expect stuff of us and when you begin to stop functioning you feel that pressure even more as you start to question why you are not able to perform the things "normal" people do.

This is why I like the video in the OP so much because some times you don't need someone to blast into your life like a tornado and be a hero for you. All you need is an unconditional friend that will listen to you whilst you rant about how it's society thats f_cked (we're the sane ones lol) or sit and talk about video games until the early hours and not make you feel like a complete f_ck up because you couldn't face getting up out of you're bed until late in the afternoon.

This is why I love the internet because we can just be our true selves. We tend to think that our online friends are somehow seperate from reality whatever that is. But that little U2U you send or the PM you leave even though they are offline but lets them know you still care or even that hillarious gif you must share could have some very real life influences on the person at the other end that message.



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 07:39 PM
link   
I didn't think Robin Williams death would bother me so much. I can't discuss it on the phone because I cry. I cry because I feel the pain he felt. I know how it feels, the struggle. He had everything, money, fame, family, luxuries I can only dream of and yet none of those things made him happy.

Possessions and material things do not make you happy. Heck even family can't. I know from personal experience. I've dealt with depression and bi polar for years and have had very little help and it's not from lack of trying. Mental health where I live is a joke. Meds make me a zombie and well I can't live like that, that's not living it's being. It's a struggle every day and some days I do want to crawl in a hole and never come out but I have my son, he keeps me going. I put on that smile, fake as it may be most of the time, but I do it and I do what is needed. From the outside nobody would be able to tell I'm depressed unless you happened to be very close to me.

I have people close to me like my husband who just do not understand depression and think that by thinking happy thoughts or having things will just magically make it all better. It doesn't work that way! It is very frustrating because they don't understand and they think they can just fix you and well they can't.

I don't open up easily, although I find it easier to do so on here. I've had more support from people I've never met than those closest to me.

I have mentioned wanting to check myself into a place yet nobody takes me seriously. It's not like I can just do it because I have my son and he would need to be taken care of while I'm gone. I have called the local places and they NEVER call me back. I called the suicide hotline before only to be treated like I was interrupting the person on the other end. So it can be REALLY hard to reach out for help when you are always getting slapped in face for doing so. Believe me I know. I get so angry. I feel like nobody cares who is suppose to. I hate feeling this way. I wasn't always this way.

Here's an excerpt from my favorite some. It's literally been like mini therapy to me many times, if I could ever meet Rob Thomas I'd thank him.


I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I use to be....me



(post by tencap77 removed for a serious terms and conditions violation)

posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 08:05 PM
link   
I have suffered with depression for decades and I still pile on the regrets. I do take Mirtazapine and go to the VA and have even just graduated a group and hung the certificate beside my Honorable and my two Arcoms and many acheesement medals.

I try and see the accomplishments I have done but I just can't seem to get passed the regrets and even though I have support of family who really does love me I sometimes simply cannot pass through that door and when someone does get me out I feel like I have failure written across my forehead. I just cannot shake it.

Mr. Williams dying hit home for me since his death fell on the three year anniversary of the death of my father. Last week I ran off my girlfriend of two years so now I sit in my house trying to find anything that will give me hope but all I can see is grey.

Thank you for posting this vid. It did affect me enough to write this. Maybe I am not as alone in this as I have thought.



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 08:22 PM
link   

originally posted by: Terminal1
I have suffered with depression for decades and I still pile on the regrets. I do take Mirtazapine and go to the VA and have even just graduated a group and hung the certificate beside my Honorable and my two Arcoms and many acheesement medals.

I try and see the accomplishments I have done but I just can't seem to get passed the regrets and even though I have support of family who really does love me I sometimes simply cannot pass through that door and when someone does get me out I feel like I have failure written across my forehead. I just cannot shake it.

Mr. Williams dying hit home for me since his death fell on the three year anniversary of the death of my father. Last week I ran off my girlfriend of two years so now I sit in my house trying to find anything that will give me hope but all I can see is grey.

Thank you for posting this vid. It did affect me enough to write this. Maybe I am not as alone in this as I have thought.


For me...accomplishments are never enough. I have many but they just seem to be only memories which seem to fade.

The grey you speak of is always lurking isn't it? Think of this...we who confess to the grey are most likely the few who admit to it. Look around on the street...look at the faces...they are all in their grey.

Our Difference I believe is that we see it. I sometimes think that we see more than most. Maybe that's why we feel more than most?

When you wake up tomorrow, remember this conversation and look beyond the grey...at least try. That's what we Do.

Peace



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 08:37 PM
link   
a reply to: jude11

Yea... it never fades. I can see the grey in others. Easy to see cause I can relate.

Tomorrow to me is always a hurdle. Each and every one of them. I survive each day if that makes sense. I survive but that can be considered a curse, can't it?

I should get a puppy...




posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 08:45 PM
link   

originally posted by: Terminal1
a reply to: jude11

Yea... it never fades. I can see the grey in others. Easy to see cause I can relate.

Tomorrow to me is always a hurdle. Each and every one of them. I survive each day if that makes sense. I survive but that can be considered a curse, can't it?

I should get a puppy...



Puppies need love and we need to feel it.

No grey.

Name him/her "puppy"

Peace



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 09:36 PM
link   

originally posted by: Char-Lee
a reply to: Night Star




You have your ATS family by your side.



Well I wish that were so, but there are many cruel and thoughtless people here also, very unfortunate.




Then ignore them and stick to people like the ones in this thread who can relate and understand and have compassion for others.



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 09:40 PM
link   
a reply to: Terminal1


I should get a puppy...


I just bought some more fish. So pretty and soothing to watch them. Do what makes you happy.



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 09:44 PM
link   

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: Terminal1


I should get a puppy...


I just bought some more fish. So pretty and soothing to watch them. Do what makes you happy.





I like the electric blue fish....Vibrant!

Peace



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 09:52 PM
link   
a reply to: calstorm

not entirely true.

imho, how much we know about ourselves make a huge difference between being depressed and being not depressed.

if the depressed ones still need someone to make her less depressed... what will happen when that someone is taken away from her/his life?

peace
edit on 12-8-2014 by dodol because: (no reason given)



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 09:56 PM
link   
a reply to: jude11

Did you get any?? I'm keeping it simple and have one community small bow front aquarium with some tiger barbs and fancy guppies in all colors and designs, some kind of algae eater fish with little polka dots and whiskers LOL, and there is a neon in there somewhere. Then...I have a big tank with just my turtle. And..I have good sized glass bowls...one has a few goldfish I rescued from being feeder fish LOL, one has a beautiful blue betta, and my newest arrival today, a rather exotic colorful betta. Oh and I rescued a baby rat from being snake food. LOL



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 10:01 PM
link   

originally posted by: dodol
a reply to: calstorm

not entirely true.

imho, how much we know about ourselves make a huge difference between being depressed and being not depressed.

if the depressed ones still need someone to make her less depressed... what will happen when that someone is taken away from her/his life?

peace



As a person with experience in Depression, we know too much it seems.

we never NEED someone to take us out of it but rather just to leave us alone if we ask and to be honest when we need. Can't explain but there it is.

Peace



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 10:05 PM
link   

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: jude11

Did you get any?? I'm keeping it simple and have one community small bow front aquarium with some tiger barbs and fancy guppies in all colors and designs, some kind of algae eater fish with little polka dots and whiskers LOL, and there is a neon in there somewhere. Then...I have a big tank with just my turtle. And..I have good sized glass bowls...one has a few goldfish I rescued from being feeder fish LOL, one has a beautiful blue betta, and my newest arrival today, a rather exotic colorful betta. Oh and I rescued a baby rat from being snake food. LOL


No fish right now but I have a squirrel that insists on coming in thru my window and sharing my Dinner table sometimes.

Best thing? He/She? Never judges me...lol

Peace



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 10:08 PM
link   

originally posted by: dodol
a reply to: calstorm

not entirely true.

imho, how much we know about ourselves make a huge difference between being depressed and being not depressed.

if the depressed ones still need someone to make her less depressed... what will happen when that someone is taken away from her/his life?

peace




When that someone is taken away, how can you NOT be depressed? We can know all there is to know about ourselves and still be depressed. For some it is because of things beyond their control. Perhaps they have been through too much for too long. Usually depressed people feel things very deeply and are deeply sensitive beings. Even if they were once bubbly and happy go lucky, they can only take so much for so long before they can't bounce back again.

There is a myriad of reasons why a person might be depressed. It's not like a depressed person can just turn their emotions on and off with a switch.



posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 10:10 PM
link   
a reply to: jude11

A squirrel? Oh how sweet, he/she adopted you!




posted on Aug, 12 2014 @ 10:47 PM
link   

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: jude11

A squirrel? Oh how sweet, he/she adopted you!



I prefer that we chose each other.

We have an agreement...He/She keeps me happy and I promise to not make squirrel stew. lol

Peace




top topics



 
57
<< 1    3  4  5 >>

log in

join