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The faith of the Fatherless

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posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 10:35 AM
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I don't buy the premise that having a father in a family makes the child a better person.

Science doesn't agree with you.

The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children




posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 12:09 PM
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a reply to: adjensen



"Involved fathers" ...
"A father who has a good relationship with the mother"
"positive relationship between mother and father"
"Fathers who treat the mothers of their children with respect"
"Children with involved, caring fathers"
"Toddlers with involved fathers"
"children with good relationships with their fathers"


That's talking about INVOLVED fathers AND ones having a good relationship with the mothers. Ones that play with the children and are involved in their lives. Of course, children with involved, supportive parents who respect each other and have a good relationship themselves, regardless of gender, are going to grow up more self-confident, secure and level headed. But the mere presence of the father in the house does not create these things.

My father was married to my mother and lived with us my entire upbringing, but he was very mean, and his relationship with me consisted of abusive "punishment" when it was deemed necessary. He also attended church every week, as did the entire family. He was not, I assure you, one of the fathers spoken of in your source.

If only the majority of fathers were loving and involved, as the ones in your source.



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 12:20 PM
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originally posted by: Benevolent Heretic
a reply to: adjensen



"Involved fathers" ...
"A father who has a good relationship with the mother"
"positive relationship between mother and father"
"Fathers who treat the mothers of their children with respect"
"Children with involved, caring fathers"
"Toddlers with involved fathers"
"children with good relationships with their fathers"


That's talking about INVOLVED fathers AND ones having a good relationship with the mothers. Ones that play with the children and are involved in their lives. Of course, children with involved, supportive parents who respect each other and have a good relationship themselves, regardless of gender, are going to grow up more self-confident, secure and level headed. But the mere presence of the father in the house does not create these things.

My father was married to my mother and lived with us my entire upbringing, but he was very mean, and his relationship with me consisted of abusive "punishment" when it was deemed necessary. He also attended church every week, as did the entire family. He was not, I assure you, one of the fathers spoken of in your source.

If only the majority of fathers were loving and involved, as the ones in your source.


Seems to me that if families maintained relationships of such quality, it wouldn't matter if a father was involved. I know plenty of people who grew up with single mothers and they are much better people than many who had a father during their childhood.

Having a father means next to nothing. Having FAMILY means everything.

It should also be noted that having a father has nothing to do with who you are as a person. If having a father makes the difference between being a psychopath and being a model citizen, you're probably a psychopath anyway.
edit on 23-6-2014 by AfterInfinity because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 01:02 PM
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a reply to: Benevolent Heretic


That's talking about INVOLVED fathers AND ones having a good relationship with the mothers.

Well, you started by saying that it didn't matter if someone had a father, now you're saying that it only matters if they're a specific type of father. I wouldn't disagree, but those two statements are not compatible. It either matters or it doesn't, and your anecdotal evidence, that it didn't matter for you, isn't sufficient evidence that it doesn't matter to anyone else.


Two biological parents provide the safest environment for a child, according to a study released last week by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s (CDC) National Center for Health Statistics. The study is the first to look specifically at biological and non-biological parents, rather than married, cohabitating, or same-sex parents.

The study found that children are more likely to experience potentially traumatic events, like household violence or a parent’s incarceration, when they live with only one or neither of their biological parents. (Source)

In other words, the best environment for raising children is one in which both of their biological parents participate in their upbringing. That is both common sense and borne out by study after study.



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 01:43 PM
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originally posted by: adjensen
Well, you started by saying that it didn't matter if someone had a father, now you're saying that it only matters if they're a specific type of father.


It's still my position that it doesn't matter if someone has a father, specifically. YOUR source was talking about a specific kind of father. I simply pointed that out.

My position is that any parents, male or female, singly or married, opposite or same sex, if they are loving and involved will be more likely to raise a well-adjusted kid. It's the loving and involved part that's important, not the gender of the parent.

We're getting off topic, I'm afraid.



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 02:29 PM
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a reply to: Benevolent Heretic


My position is that any parents, male or female, singly or married, opposite or same sex, if they are loving and involved will be more likely to raise a well-adjusted kid.

Your position is an opinion, not factual, because, as I have shown, the preponderance of evidence is that the best environment for raising children is one in which both biological parents, mother and father, play a significant role.

That doesn't mean that single parents can't raise good kids (I should know, I was a single father to my daughter for ten years,) or that two parent homes are guaranteed good kids, but study after study has shown that the traditional family is the best environment for raising children.

At any rate, as regards the OP, I will point out again that studies have shown that the passing along of faith to the next generation is significantly swayed by the father/child relationship, so if the father has a good relationship with his kids, his religiosity/irreligiosity is likely to be passed on and reflected in the kid when they grow up, but if he is absent or does not have a good relationship, his beliefs are of little consequence to his offspring.



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 02:32 PM
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originally posted by: adjensen
a reply to: Benevolent Heretic


My position is that any parents, male or female, singly or married, opposite or same sex, if they are loving and involved will be more likely to raise a well-adjusted kid.

Your position is an opinion, not factual, because, as I have shown, the preponderance of evidence is that the best environment for raising children is one in which both biological parents, mother and father, play a significant role.

That doesn't mean that single parents can't raise good kids (I should know, I was a single father to my daughter for ten years,) or that two parent homes are guaranteed good kids, but study after study has shown that the traditional family is the best environment for raising children.

At any rate, as regards the OP, I will point out again that studies have shown that the passing along of faith to the next generation is significantly swayed by the father/child relationship, so if the father has a good relationship with his kids, his religiosity/irreligiosity is likely to be passed on and reflected in the kid when they grow up, but if he is absent or does not have a good relationship, his beliefs are of little consequence to his offspring.


Why not the mother's beliefs?



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 05:24 PM
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originally posted by: AfterInfinity
Why not the mother's beliefs?


I think the idea is that God is a "father figure" (he's male, you know). So, if a father is around and the child feels a good relationship with his dad, he will also have a good relationship with his god.

Of course, I don't think it's that simple (there are FAR too many factors for it to be that simple) and if you read the OP's source, it seems to be a hit piece of sorts on atheists, claiming that people who don't have a good relationship with their father have unresolved issues and that shows up as a "hatred" or "rejection" of God.

I find it very interesting that this religious website think they know the minds of atheists... Truth is, my atheism has nothing to do with my father, nor is it related to a "hatred" or "rejection" of something I think is a fantasy.

Anyway, people will believe what they believe. I know why I'm an atheist and it has nothing to do with my parents.



posted on Jun, 23 2014 @ 05:30 PM
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originally posted by: Benevolent Heretic

originally posted by: AfterInfinity
Why not the mother's beliefs?


I think the idea is that God is a "father figure" (he's male, you know). So, if a father is around and the child feels a good relationship with his dad, he will also have a good relationship with his god.

Of course, I don't think it's that simple (there are FAR too many factors for it to be that simple) and if you read the OP's source, it seems to be a hit piece of sorts on atheists, claiming that people who don't have a good relationship with their father have unresolved issues and that shows up as a "hatred" or "rejection" of God.

I find it very interesting that this religious website think they know the minds of atheists... Truth is, my atheism has nothing to do with my father, nor is it related to a "hatred" or "rejection" of something I think is a fantasy.

Anyway, people will believe what they believe. I know why I'm an atheist and it has nothing to do with my parents.


Same here.




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