You can't go back: Thoughts on growing up.

You can't go back to the way it was. This isn't meant to be a doom and gloom thread, just my thoughts.

Here are some examples.

I met a girl the other day who is 19; I am 23. Now it might seem like we are in the same age range, but it is ridiculous how much I have matured since when I was 19. I tried talking to her and connecting with her, and we were hitting it off at first, but I realized there was much we did not have in common. The maturity level just wasn't the same.

A similar thing happened with a girl a few months ago who also happened to be 19. I had to end our relationship because I couldn't handle the "high school" attitude. Now I know this makes me sounds like a total (insert word here) but to be honest I will stand by my opinions. You can't go back to an earlier time. We change too much throughout the years.

(Quick interlude to say trust me I know I am still young and have a lot to learn but I still feel like sharing this)

Another example. About a month ago I went to my home state to visit family and friends. I was shocked at how some of my friends were still acting in the manner of how they did in high school and not progressing in life. I could no longer connect with them on the level that we used to "back in the day."

Next example. I had a chat with my coworker who is 25, and we talked about how unfortunately we are growing up. It really is not a bad thing but once you do grow up its hard to go back. Yes we still act like kids and have fun at times, but there is a certain point in your life where maturity kicks in. I personally like it. I like knowing the consequences of my actions and being able to think ahead instead of making rash decisions.

Just felt like sharing my thoughts on growing up. Feel free to join in on the discussion.

Gaining maturity is an ongoing process, with one unfortunate side effect: death.

You ask for comments. I dunno, I'm a lot older than you. When I hear talk about getting old, I think of a line from a Leonard Cohen Song:

And I lift my glass to the awful truth
Which you can't reveal to the ears of youth
Except to say 'it isn't worth a dime

The major difference for me between my old mind and young mind is that all the enthusiasms, all the excitement over things, all the hope to change the world strikes me as futile and pointless. Pleasure becomes more and more about simple things, that would have bored me in my younger years. Judging by the behaviour of really old people, I expect this trend to continue. Wisdom in the modern world is equivalent with being jaded, sadly.

So my two cents? Don't rush toward "maturity" or pride yourself on having it. It comes to us all, in spades. Along with its unfortunate side effect.

PEace

reply to post by tridentblue


Very good wisdom!

Don't think of it as aging, think of it as leveling up.

reply to post by tridentblue


I just got knowledge handed to me on a platter.

Tastes good man.

You sure can not ever go back! The only thing that stays the same is change. I understand where you are coming from, when I was your age I felt so disconnected from those around me. I grew up fast and when I was 18 everyone thought I was 25. The thing is now that I am 30, everyone still thinks I am 25. It is odd. Before I was the guy that was more mature than my peers, now I am not. I have watched all my friends get married, get sucked into a job and what not; I am still the same, it's not that I do not want to grow up; there is too much living yet to do. Who wants to be stuck in a life of suburbia, and be married to a soccer mom, or be a soccer mom? I am not sure what to tell you? I wouldn't be so quick to disregard what a 19 year old tells you. In the grand scheme of it all, we have all been around the block a few times, some of us more then others have. A 19 year old may have more wisdom behind them then a 70 year old, it all just depends on who they are, you never know who it was you are talking to, or for that matter, who you are.

You sure can not ever go back! The only thing that stays the same is change. I understand where you are coming from, when I was your age I felt so disconnected from those around me. I grew up fast and when I was 18 everyone thought I was 25. The thing is now that I am 30, everyone still thinks I am 25. It is odd. Before I was the guy that was more mature than my peers, now I am not. I have watched all my friends get married, get sucked into a job and what not; I am still the same, it's not that I do not want to grow up; there is too much living yet to do. Who wants to be stuck in a life of suburbia, and be married to a soccer mom, or be a soccer mom? I am not sure what to tell you? I wouldn't be so quick to disregard what a 19 year old tells you. In the grand scheme of it all, we have all been around the block a few times, some of us more then others have. A 19 year old may have more wisdom behind them then a 70 year old, it all just depends on who they are, you never know who it was you are talking to, or for that matter, who you are.

reply to post by bryan2006


It's so early in the morn yet all this awesome input and knowledge!

Now I know I shouldn't discount all 19 year olds. It's just I have had bad experiences with two in a row!

Maybe as a mature person, I shouldn't group them all together and continue to give the younger generation a chance. After all people don't stay one age forever. One day they will be 23 as I am now. Ugh I woke up too early to be thinking of this deep stuff.

reply to post by tridentblue


That in a nut shell!

It's funny that I didn't really notice it until I looked around. I don't recognise much of the world I used to see around me. Everything can seem, at times, played out. But so terribly bad and not in any way it comes across on here from 99% of the threads. I see it as a downward spiral that we're willingly playing along to, and it only leads to a singularly dismal end - complete apathy and stupidity. We're a herd. Being herded. But the food is nice, and the shiny things make us uhhuh it's a fly splatt it..

But it's not all so corrupt and futile, there are sparks of ingenuity and no hint of selfishness to make things different. But ultimately, like the program of life, they will isolate themselves and eventually perish from loneliness.

The rest will implode in a world of indifference and selfishness, seeking the newest fruit product because the internet isn't on the tubes any more, it floats all around you, in everything. isolation from real world social interaction and confined to the walled in reality that keeps satiated and passive.

And they don't even realise it. they're too busy with their face buried in the phone on the angry birds or the twitters.. I never have to avoid making eye contact on public transport these days. No one lifts their head.

Originally posted by zonetripper2065
Don't think of it as aging, think of it as leveling up.

Haha how funny that is as it's closer to the truth than the young'uns will consider.

They're still on the first level and it's all pew pew and running with the knife... When you've played the same level enough times as you progress tho, and mostly fail or just make it, then you start to realise how far ago it appears when things were easy and re-spawning was only for nubs and spawn campers.

Life calls an air strike on you and bam everything's flashing red and you can't move properly for the next 40 years.. stoopid life..

Oo

reply to post by winofiend


Like I said in my OP, this isn't meant to be a doom and gloom thread, just some thoughts.

Oh trust me I still see the magic in the world, when I get out of town and out into the mountains and forests.

I still talk to people face to face. It is the best way of communicating. I have actually come across people who seem to have lost the ability to talk in person anymore. Sad huh?

I still act like a kid from time to time, but I still think maturity has its place. That doesn't mean you have to be a prude and such, it just means you are more wise and careful in a way. Maturity can strike at any age I know this much. My 4 year old niece has held conversations with me that made more sense than most adults nowadays.

Like I said, I just felt like sharing some thoughts and I am open enough of a person that I will accept other people's thoughts as well. So keep the thoughts flowing!

reply to post by winofiend


I'll figure it out eventually, one day I'll be an old wizard.

You'll loose that mature feeling when you go through your midlife crisis. Stay in shape so you don't break anything...

I'm 42 and I don't think I've ever grown up at all.
At least my wife keeps telling me to grow up.
My twin on the other hand has already had his midlife crisis, wanting to be a gangsta, wideboy whatever you want to call them ( t***ers is what I call 'em). But he's matured a bit now.
I still play games, muck around as I feel that as soon as you start to 'grow up' you lose the sense of wonder the world has.